Topic : Stress at Work

Is this a small company or a big corporation?  If this is a big corporation, most likely they have corporate headquarters located somewhere that you can right a letter of concern too.  Most likely this will take care of the situation.  However, if this is a small company, maybe whenever this is brought up in conversation you should try to change the subject.  If changing the subject does not work, then walk away from the crowd of people you are with.  By walking away it shows that you are not interested in hearing these rumors any longer, and this may change the subjects at lunch and breaks.  No matter where you go to work there are always gossipers, some people do it more often than others. There are Aholes everywhere.

Never tell evil of a man, if you do not know it for certainty, and if you know it for a certainty, then ask yourself, 'Why should I tell it?'

I would send an anonomous letter to the corporate headquarters detailing what is going on.  Guarenteed something will be done about it.

 It seems as though there is no justice in the work place unless you are in just the right position.

First of all, I have learned that supervisors and managers do not really want to deal with your problems.  It has come to my attention also, that squeaky wheels often get replaced, ignored or black-listed.

Complain, venting and being generally pissed will just make YOU look bad.

Going over the heads of immediate supervisors (via corporate or HR office) will usually just make it worse.  If your boss gets in trouble, they will take it out on you and your co-workers (because they are going to point the finger back).   If they know that it was YOU that "told on them"  (which they usually do), they may tell coworkers and others so that you will get blamed any way you slice it. 

So... what are we to do to protect our dignity and rights:  I will suggest a few ways to deal......

*Know your co.'s policy on everything....Read and learn the co. handbook, If you have questions, call HR, for answers..(not for justice).

*Obey all rules (no matter how dumb).

^Try to think of work as just a way to finance your life....not as your life.

*Be yourself.  They hired you for a reason.

^Let go at the end of the day.

Lastly, contact a Lawyer or the dept. of labor if you think you are being harassed or treated unfairly.  Employers should not be allowed to leverage our Jobs so they can do what ever they please.

By the way.......   "at will" employment  does not mean that you have no rights.

I work in the courts system.  I have worked there for over a decade.  I have trained many people to do my desk.  Some of the people I trained, came from a job that did similar work and had experience, while some did not.  All of those people went on to be promoted to other jobs. I have only had a minor problems with one of the people I trained, but that person did not want to do my desk and I can understand that, it is a very busy desk, that requires doing mail, answering telephones, going to the counter and other tasks.  The people I work with have become family.  We can all talk about anything to each other.  I have wonderful bosses.  I just love my desk duties.  Until this month.  It  is ironic that they hired someone to learn my desk to help me and that person has made my life this month a "living hell."  I have developed headaches within an hour of being at work and I go home and within an hour or so thankfully they are gone.  The problem this person has created at work for my desk is unpresidented.  I am supposed to be training this person during "probationary" period and report all mistakes to the bosses.  This person charges ahead and does not follow instructions.  I have, in the past, trained someone  who charged ahead and made mistakes, but that person learned from them and did not repeat them.  This person keeps repeating them.  I took a few days vacation leave from work and when I came back, there was so much to clean up from that person's mistakes, I started having headaches full time and cannot sleep nor keep from throwing  up at home. I am getting physically worn out.   I don't want to get into details, because I don't want anyone to recognize this situation.  My last backup, whom the new trainee seems to like (and I want to keep it that way and keep my last backup out of it), took the last problem to the bosses.  Up until then, I had been correcting the mistakes with the thought that the person would catch on to their mistakes.  The bosses called me in and I had to tell them about the other mistakes this person was making.  The bosses were not happy with me, because I had not documented the mistakes and brought them to their attention.  So now the bosses have told me I have to "check everything" the new trainee does, document mistakes  and bring it to them.  I think the new trainee thinks I told the bosses about the mistake. The trainee started being rude to me and everytime the trainee needed help the trainee went to my last backup coworker.  That coworker has told me that the new trainee cannot possibly have any past experience in doing what is required because she has noticed that the new trainee is making the same mistakes that even someone who has no experience would "catch on to and not make."  I made simple instruction sheets and gave it to the trainee and at the trainee acted insulted.  Later the trainee came back and thanked me and I thought things would get better.  But when the trainee  made another mistake on something simple that I gave very clear oral instruction on  how to do,  the trainee came to my desk and slammed down a copy of our regulations with yellow highlight that  co-employes are to be treated with dignity and went loudly announced that I was the problem in training, because I was treating like she was dumb.  I went to the bosses and took the file with the mistake and asked to be relieved of the training.  The trainee came into the bosses office while I was their and asked the same thing.  The trainee, in front of me,  told the bosses I was rude, embarrassed said trainee and treated trainee as stupid.  I was speechless.  The bosses told us both that there was no one else to train the trainee.  The bosses had separate interview with us after that.  The bosses told me I had to train this trainee and that ANTHING the trainee does wrong I have to bring to their attention.  I told the bosses my stress levels are up and that I have headaches constantly at work and I am not sure I can "do a desk two people did by myself, train the trainee by giving written instruction on everything in order to have proof of what I told the trainee to do and review all trainee's work" but the bosses pointed out we are shorthanded and that there is no other option  for me.  I don't want to be in any way shape or form reponsible for someone losing their job.  I have not had an experience with a co worker like this before.  I was really excited about getting someone to help me at my desk, now I am thinking about quiting my job.  I have bills to pay, but if the stress keeps up and I don't want to have a stroke from high blood pressure, those bills are not going to get paid if I am dead.  I am trying to stay calm at  work and treat this trainee as if nothing has happened and just go on training, but when I come home, I cannot sleep and I am throwing up when I try to eat. People at work ask me what is wrong, but I do not comment.  I know I cannot discuss this problem at work with anyone at work other than the bosses.  I have discussed it with my children and even my exhusband and they tell me that I should demand that this trainee be fired.  But I cannot accept being responsible for someone losing their job.  I would have to quit first.   IS MY JOB THAT I USED TO LOVE WORTH THIS? 

Hello everybody, i have a problem at work, not a serious problem but it's bothering me

4 months ago, a new gentleman started work with us, he's handsome and foreign

I did'nt talk to her for a long time, by little by little we stated getting to know each other one day we had lunch together, we used to send to each other e-mails at work but nothing more

actually, i hoped he could ask to go out with him but he didn't, after a while, he stopped talking to me as usual, just good morning, he stopped sending to me e-mails and stopped invinting me, i didn't understand why, and i did the same thing as he did

the last week, another person said to me that there are some rumors, they said that someone saw us in a coffe in the week end and it's totally wrong, it didn't happen

the problem is that 2 other people told me the same thing, everybody is talking about us

yesterday, i called him and i told him what is happening and he shocked me because he already knew it, but he didn't tell me anything because there's nothing to worry about, he didn't care

after a while, he came back to see me and told me : if this rumor is true, maybe we should do it really : ))"

i don't know what to do, i just hate this place, i hate the fact that everyone is gossiping and talking about me but no one dare ta face me

and even if it's true, it's personnal it's not their business

what do i have to do?

Hi, I have been happily married for four years to a wonderful guy. Well, he's not that great, he has been struggling through college for five years now and changed his major 3-4 times and still has not graduated, but nevertheless, I do love him.

My problem is that I am having conflicting feelings about my boss. Every time I have a job with a male boss, I start to have feelings for them. I do not want to have feelings for male bosses, but it seems like anytime a male boss "helps" me (ie. gives me a job, promotions, encouragement, praise) I start fantasizing about having sex with them or even worse having a life with them.

I do not want to have these feelings at all. I even went so far as to talk to my husband about these feelings regarding my current boss because I knew that talking about it would help me. And it did! I no longer have these feelings as often. 

Help! How can I work with men or have male bosses and not want to have sex with them or leave my husband to be with them??!! This is a major problem I have with working with men and I really need some advice. Thank you.

CubeDrama is an online study that encourages visitors to share their work/career related experiences. All experiences whether they reveal funny, frenzied, dicey or unfortunate incidents will be accepted. To protect the innocent and not so innocent, names of people and/or corporations will always be omitted.  This site is not designed to reveal or disclose identities. Use this site as your soapbox and sound off-you got something to tell!  Visit the CubeDrama community to submit your story, answer the question of the week-or just have fun.