Topic : 10/17 Sexual Predators?

This is a subject that has touched my life personally more than once. Having been the victim of this crime and having to spend years in psycotherapy as a result I have dealt with both the victim's and the abusers role and how they interplay with each other.

 

That being said let me start by saying that the pedophile/sexual predator is a product of our society. Sexuality has been made so dirty by television and the big screen and we as consumers have let it happen. Young kids, especially girls, are dressed up and made to look like they are 27. Is it so strange then that a man could look at an attractive young girl and relate in his mind that she is older than her actual age and act on the normal sexual drive God put in all men?

 

What this man did goes beyond explanation and in no way to I excuse his actions. He is an adult and must have some moral conscience in his head, to think otherwise is to admit we are nothing but animals. I don't believe sex offenders of any type are born that way. They learn that behavior from the circumstances of their formative years and all the censory input they encounter druing that time. So if one comes from an abused background and has no strong moral guidlines to offset that he/she will most likely have some serious mental issues to deal with.

 

Why is pornography allowed on the world wide web? Is that really freedom of speach? No, it is just plain sick irregardless of how old the participants in the scenes may be. Much of this trash is produced here in the US but more time and attention is being paid to "border patrol" and saving the northern wilderness in Alaska from oil drilling. Out national priorities are perverted as badly as the people who end up committing such horrible crimes.

 

Why are Playboy and Playgirl Magazines accepted in our society at all? This is blatent mental polution that society thinks is just fine, benign, harmless but is in fact giving people a warped sense of who and what the opposite sex is as a person. And anyone who thinks that their teenage kids don't get their hands on this pornography is lying to themselves.

 

There is always going to be some sickness in society but when a society contributes to the cause and then asks why it happens is most disturbing because I can't believe people are that blisfully ignorant!

 

What this man did is horrible and I have a hard time understanding what he did like so many of you have expressed. A three year old child? Yes we need to find out how this man got the way he is and fix the social issues so that it doesn't continue to happen!  

Recently, we allowed our young teen age daughter to go alone on a cruise with her best friend and her divorced father whom we have known for about 14 years.  On 2 seperate mornings while his daughter lay sleeping in the bed next to my daughter this pervert touched her inappropriately.  He put his hands down her pajama pants mostly on the buttocks.  My daughter pretended to be asleep hoping he would leave her alone. When he tried to come around to the front, she removed his hand and pretended to go back to sleep. Thankfully he left her alone.  To use his position of trust, friendship and generosity in an effort to molest my daughter is unforgivable.  To think that she was in the middle of the ocean unable to communicate with either my husband or me makes me sick to my stomach - can you imagine what a predicament this was for my daughter? No one to turn to - so vulnerable!!!!

 

This was the ultimate betrayal. I want to prosecute, my husband is on the fence and my daughter does not want to as she is concerned about her friend and her future because of the emotional and economic impact.  I fear that she will regret that decision years from now and I feel that without justice the rage stays within me.  Help!!!

 I feel the mom in this  Chester Stiles case, is hiding something.  There is no way a 3yr. old child can be away from her Mom long enough to video taped and raped,  When my child was 3 I watched him at all times, Why wasn't her child crying  according to reports, the child was just laying there, like she was used to it or something. And  the mother wants him dead really really bad, now what mother wouldn't not want to confront an animal like that.  Its sad to me people would love to confront animal killers but not a man that raped your child and  not  to notice any signs from her child not even the size of her privates that makes my stomach hurt. Once again what mother would not notice her child has been touched?  Did she give the child baths was the child still wearing diapers whats wrong with these parents they need to stop doing meth and pimping their kids out. GOD forgive me if I'm wrong but not know if your child has been touched until you see on TV  four years later thats sounds RIDICULIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!

You should prosecute. Do it. Not only for what he did but is probably doing to his own daughter. I know how your daughter feels for her friends future but he has done and is probably still doing something that is clearly WRONG. If you all allow him to get away with this, you are condoning his behavior and then the pedophile wins again. No matter what, do the RIGHT thing and prosecute. She is doing a disservice to her friend if she does not go ahead with this. Her friend will thank her for it in the long run.

Dr. Phil!

 

At the age of 56 I'm still affected by a sexual predator that molested me when I was a small child. Little did

I realize as the years went by how more and more my life was defined by this horrible mess that was created by an adult. I use to feel different as a child, then it continued into my teens until I became promiscious and had a child out of wedlock. Then I nearly married someone, didn't then did marry to a man who beat me from room to room. My life just kept going in circles making poor judgement calls and decisions that further effected every aspect of my life. The only thing that remained out of wack was that I was a high achiever, became successful, I am meticulous about myself, my home and my appearance. No one would ever know any of this ever happened. In fact I never uttered a word until I was 48 yrs. old. Once this was finally out in the open I divorced a year later from a 23 yr. marriage. I moved and bought the book "Courage to Heal" and it took me nearly 1.5 yrs. to open it as when I did I became so frightened by what I read I had to stop. My ex spouse did get many questions answered by reading the companion book and we both ended up realizing that how my life turned out was not my fault, but that doesn't ever make you whole again. I am so glad this subject is being brought front and center. In fact just today in my career I have the opportunity to start to determine how these animals will be kept in civil confinement under strict supervision and housed where they can no longer hurt people.  Maybe that is the gift I've been given that I can finally do something positive to save another child from being destroyed as I was from the age of 5 forward. Dr. Phil I ask that you do everything in your professional power to expose this and to ask everyone to write there Congress and Senate Representatives and scream bloody murder until permanent housing is in place this segment of society.  Thanks for hearing me out and I hope that someone reading this will realize that your life can look normal as hell and yet be so broken inside and yet we can survive and go on and do good things in our lives......

I agree with this. It's everywhere, on TV, magazines, billboards, internet, you can't get away from it. Women allow themselves to be exploited. They are the "attention starved that do anything for money" types. Those kinds of women (Hooters waitresses, prostitutes, those in the porn industry, celebs, those that dress trashy and have no self-respect) are all enablers and give good decent women a bad name. We need to stop buying junk magazines, don't go to stores that sell pornography, weed out all the crap bit by bit and start to educate these women. When you put yourself out there in a sexual way and are in people's faces 24/7, YOU are those 'triggers' for the "pedophiles/to be". You are not helping!

 

Think about that next time. Make the right choice, be responsible in your actions and be aware of the fact that everything that you say and do and how you dress can have extremely negative consequences.

At the age of 15 I was raped by a family friend. He stayed at our home because of the distance to work. He was married with 5 kids. I was threatened if I told anyone what he did and when I was 15 (which was the late 60's) if you were attacked it was how you dressed or a certain way you led the person on. I regret that I never told my parents or anyone until I was in my 30's.  The harm this man did to me has been with me throughout my life. I wish I could go back to the day he raped me and I would prosecute him to the hilt. I never want anyone going through what I have gone through. I want him to pay for what he did but now its too late. So yes, prosecute this jerk and make him answer for what he did to your daughter!!!

 

I agree with some of the things you say, how is it possible to abuse a child in that way and there are NO traces to alarm a mother who takes care of her child like a mom is supposed to do.....

 

On the other hand, I have been thinking that maybe the child was drugged for a grown man to be able to do what he did and that little baby not crying out because of excruciating pain....... And drugs could maybe the reason she does not remember either....    In some strange way I hope that is the case....

 

 

 

My children were victimized by their older sister's boyfriend/fiance, who went on to become her husband, before the molestation was revealed. How I wish that he had looked like Stiles!  He never would have made it past the front door.  I would have nailed it shut to protect the older one, because the man just looks dangerous...and yes, could I believe him to be a pedophile?  Without a doubt...this is what they SHOULD look like.  How about a clean, college senior.  A drug free, non drinker, Dean's list student...progresses to a career in scientific research in the City's Health Department.  Looks like a younger version of Paul Newman.  Try to prove that one in court...if you can, you're better than I because the case wouldn't fly.  So, our family has been estranged for 7 years, my daughter, I have learned has 2 little girls with him. 

Thank you for calling it what it is...A MYTH...he is undoubtedly, a pedophile of raging degree...sort of like a stage four...but not a prototype...Yes, it's good to get him off the streets, no one wants him running loose...but it's no major victory.  He, sadly, is the exception, not the rule...the majority are as you've said, good looking, normal looking people...often very bright and successful.  If my daughter sees this show today (I hope that she doesn't), it will just strenghthen her belief that her husband is innocent, and her brother and sister are liars....he doesn't look like that, certainly never acted like that...so he'll be seen as more innocent today then yesterday. 

Stiles wouldn't fool too many people, certainly, he would not  have been welcomed in MY home...I had to luck out with Mr. Nice Guy, who did fool me, my husband, our relatives and friends...but worst of all, he raped my children by using their trust...more than likely inspired by OUR trust. 

While I hope that Stiles gets put away for a long time, i hope moreso that his appearance doesn't lull families into the security that is so false...the trap that we, and too many others, have fallen into.  HE IS THE EXCEPTION,NOT THE RULE!  You can't tell by looking, that's why the conviction rate is so low, why so many children are not believed.  If they all looked like that, I can tell you for damn sure there'd have been two less victims of childhood sexual abuse....my son and my daughter!