In reading some of the posts on here I am sitting here and thinking this is some of the reason that we have the problem with child molestation that we do. People tend to think of this as a sexual problem that these men and sometimes women are having and therefore the obvious answer would be to end the sexual part of that person…Castration. This while a good thought will NEVER stop or even impede child molestation. Reason being is simple. It is not any form of SEX to the perpetrator and certainly not to the victim. It is a form of control for the perpetrator. Most of the time they have been controlled themselves and feel their lives are out of control and so they compulsively do these things to try and feel like they are in control of something even if its someone else, someone helpless.
A word about tossing them in with gen. pop in prison. This does nothing to further what our cause should be which is to figure out WHO these people are POTENTIALLY before they commit their first crime. We need to figure out what the triggers are for these people, the reason they offend. We can throw them in gen. pop and kill them but if we don’t get back story on these people and find the commonalities in their histories we are only stopping that offender and the next child to be on the news could have this story;
I was ten and at the babysitters house. It was summer. We were all outside playing on the swings. I had on pink shorts and a pink and white striped top. I needed to use the restroom and went inside alone. He opened the bathroom door and quickly said excuse me didn’t know anyone was in here. When I came out very embarrassed he said let me make it up to you. I said I should go back outside. He was there to spray the house for bugs. He had a nice white uniform with his name in a patch in red letters, DAN. My mother had always told me I could always trust a man in uniform. If I was lost or scared look for a man in a uniform. How wrong she was.
He asked if I wanted to use the sprayer and I said yes that would be neat. We went from room to room with him spraying and we began talking about school, my parents, all sorts of things. I became comfortable with him quickly. I kept asking if I could spray this room or that room and he wouldn’t let me. When we got upstairs to one of the bedrooms he said it was my turn. There was a spot he couldn’t reach so he needed my help. It was under a bed with a chenille bedspread. I laid in the floor and the fringe was in my eyes from the bedspread. He offered to help and said he needed to be there anyway to help me spray. He pulled the bedspread up a little and then he laid on top of me and told me to press the button and don’t stop until he said. He assaulted me and the whole time I kept spraying and looking at that fringe hanging in my face. Then he got off me and acted like none of it happened. He walked out and left me there as he finished the house.
When I walked out of that bedroom I got to the stairs and looked back at that bed and right there put all the memories of it away. When I got outside the babysitter never suspected, when my mother picked me up she didn’t suspect, when I went to my bible school they didn’t suspect. They didn’t suspect because I had repressed the memory. I went on through my life and had some issues but I was okay. When I was twenty six I was sitting in my living room on a May day with windows open and right as I put the glass of iced tea to my lips the wind blew across my face and the memory released from somewhere in my mind and I threw the glass of tea across the room and then cried hysterically.
I am 43 now. I told my mother shortly after I remembered and she asked if I wanted to try to find him. I told her he was probably long gone. Within three months his face was on my television and they were saying he still work as an exterminator in the area and a six year old girl had reported him for molesting her. I called the DA’s office to tell my story and testify if needed. They took my name and told me they had over 50 other women who had called in with the same story. He is in prison for the rest of his life but it has been hard for me to deal with the guilt of all those other girls. If I had only had the courage to deal with it at the time this would not have happened to them. On a side note, all my life I have never been able to touch anything chenille and so far that hasn’t changed.
This is my story. I want to know how this gets started. I want to know what happens in these people’s lives that gets them to the point of inducing harm to a child to feel like they are in control and what can we do to stop it from continuing into the next generation. I was an innocent child but my offender was at a point an innocent child as well. He was not born a monster, he was made. I want to know how.
I know this has been long and thank you for reading my story
You've read the headlines, now watch the story about a crime so heinous some would rather see the suspect dead than in jail. The manhunt for the nation's most wanted alleged pedophile ended last night as fugitive Chester Stiles, accused in the videotaped molestation of a three-year-old girl, was arrested outside Las Vegas. Stiles had been wanted since October 5 on warrants issued for 21 felony charges in connection with acts seen on the videotape. Could you spot a child predator? Is your family at risk? Be there when Dr. Phil tells you the warning signs to watch for -- you'll be shocked! Plus, the reported victim's mother breaks her silence in an exclusive interview with Dr. Phil. Then, hear what Stiles' ex-girlfriend's son has to say, and what the victim remembers about the attack. If it's happening now, Dr. Phil is going to deal with it now! Don't miss this breaking news Dr. Phil Now. Join the discussion.
