Message Boards

Topic : Workplace Bullies

Number of Replies: 245
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Thursday, July 07, 2005, 09:25:23 am
Author : dataimport
Bullying is not just a schoolyard pastime anymore, it has spread to the workplace as well. Share your stories, support and advice with others dealing with a bully at work.

As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

October 18, 2005, 6:52 pm CDT

Workplace Bullies

Quote From: lucky35

You're peace of mind is more important than any senority at a company or money. You could possibly claim harrassment.  I would document everything being done to you or said to you. Harrassment charges are a long shot because you'll probably be the one fired if you decide to go that route, but since you've been there for so long, you might be able to get an attorney to represent you.  I would talk to an attorney and see what he/she says, too. If you can't find one to back you up then I wouldn't do it, but if these people are this way now, they won't change. So, you might consider looking for another job.  It just isn't worth the stress you're under to continue with a group of unprofessional, mean-spirited people like these and unfortunately these are the type of people that companies usually keep and they let all the good employees go.
Your so right! I did decide to apply to another job. Things got out of hand and I did ask for help from "higher" ups. The reply I got was I was just trying to set up these people and the finished with a snipy remark that he had better things to do than deal with it.  I decided that they can have these witches.  I am looking forward to working with new employer, they do not tolerate such behavior, even gossips are fired post haste.  Thank you for your advise, it was very much appreciated. It will be awsome to actually look forward to going to work. :)
 
October 22, 2005, 9:54 am CDT

Workplace bullies

After 16 yrs. at the same company, and after I was given accolades, awards, great reviews and raises along the way, a new supervisor comes along and all of a sudden, my performance goes down the drain! Of course it did not but my supervisor was insecure and wore her poor self-esteem on her shoulder. She documented complete lies about me and just because they were in writing with a date, they were supposedly true. She is still doing this to employees that she doesn't like (because of her insecurity) and who are exemplarary employees. I know Dr. Phil says to not give power over to the bad guys, but when it's your supervisor and she has the key to your career future, good or bad, what do you do? I eventually had to leave the company because the bullying affected my health.  I could have stayed on and she would have eventually terminated my employment. She doesn't care about employees getting quality work done and being a dependable, good employee, she just cares about how much you kiss her butt and stroke her ego to make her feel good. What a sick person she is!  However, I'm trying to learn from this and put it behind me.  I won't retaliate because I know God will take of that for me and she is probably a miserable person. 

 
November 1, 2005, 6:28 pm CST

Schoolhouse bullies...the grown-up kind

Principals can be the worst of workplace bullies because often no one knows what they are doing other than the people they are doing it to--who have to go through a grievance committee and follow the chain of command and otherwise put themselves way out there to voice any disention....then end up being black-balled and not able to get a job teaching anywhere. My building principal is new and not sure of himself, so he makes his way easier by trying to shut down every older, more experienced person on the staff. He writes us up for crazy things like "negative attitude" when we question some new thing he wants to do, and turns the newer staff members against us by telling them that we have old-fashioned, stagnant ideas. The superintendent isn't about to NOT defend his principal, the other teachers aren't going to risk their jobs to stand behind you, and the school board's only input will come from the superintendent...so basically you're screwed. If you're old, you earn too much for any other district to want to hire you, so you're pretty much stuck where you are for as long as you can stand being treated like a useless, brainless, hasbeen. I've been in the education business nearly 4 times as long as this principal has been, and all of my years were in elementary--while only this past year as principal has he been in an elementary school. He doesn't understand the psychology of the elementary school child, the curriculum necessities and demands. He wants to run it like a secondary school---and anything said to the contrary about how it might have a negative effect on the students--is worthy of a massive put-down and the old teacher is lableled as "having taught too many years from her laminated lesson plans"...ARGHGHGHGH! I wish there was a way that older teachers could be respected and that new principals would have to have served in the classroom for at least a few years at the level the principal is overseeing. OK I vented. Feel better. But why is it that we allow our older, more knowledgeable, more experienced people so little respect in favor of a young one who just finished 3 years undergrad and 2 years graduate school and served 2 years as a SR high coach? THis happens over and over and over....and it was just not ever right....and now it's happening to me, too!
 
November 12, 2005, 12:30 am CST

workplace bullies

I don't know if you want to read another story about a workplace bully, but maybe someone will realize they're not alone. 

  

I worked as an admin asst at a bank a few years ago.  After a few months running the dept. myself, my new boss was introduced to me.  He told me to lose some weight and get some new clothes to better represent himself.  He was a fitness freak.  We worked in an open office of cubicles, and he often yelled (raised his voice) at me so others could here.  I was in tears most of the time, and he told me to "buck up."  The last straw was when he screamed at me (he worked in a glass walled office) from his desk that I was an imbecile and useless.  He didn't even bother to walk to my cube.  The whole office heard and was silent.  After I gathered my courage, I walked into his office and said "If you have something to say to me, you should have the decency to do it in private."  He answered that he had the right to say whatever he wanted to me wherever.  Needless to say, my self esteem was shattered, and I really needed that job.  Luckily I found a job paying much less and quit. 

  

You don't have to take it!! 

 
November 12, 2005, 12:31 am CST

Workplace Bullies

Quote From: utahinbc

I don't know if you want to read another story about a workplace bully, but maybe someone will realize they're not alone. 

  

I worked as an admin asst at a bank a few years ago.  After a few months running the dept. myself, my new boss was introduced to me.  He told me to lose some weight and get some new clothes to better represent himself.  He was a fitness freak.  We worked in an open office of cubicles, and he often yelled (raised his voice) at me so others could here.  I was in tears most of the time, and he told me to "buck up."  The last straw was when he screamed at me (he worked in a glass walled office) from his desk that I was an imbecile and useless.  He didn't even bother to walk to my cube.  The whole office heard and was silent.  After I gathered my courage, I walked into his office and said "If you have something to say to me, you should have the decency to do it in private."  He answered that he had the right to say whatever he wanted to me wherever.  Needless to say, my self esteem was shattered, and I really needed that job.  Luckily I found a job paying much less and quit. 

  

You don't have to take it!! 

Oh, I forgot to add:  this man went through 6 admin assistants in 6 months.
 
November 25, 2005, 1:45 pm CST

Been there...

I have 37 yrs experience, 16 here. I have always been considered a good employee. Then I came here. Most hateful, insecure coworkers, and really twisted supervisor. They finally got their chance and fired me. I applied for unemployment and was denied, then won the appeal. I have now filed w/ the EEOC. I will not quit until I have won it all. It is so wrong for this type of thing to go on and I will not tolerate it. For those of you who are having problems, do something about it. There are many tools out there to help you. Go up the chain of command with respect for each individual, but be firm. Then go outside the firm to an attorney. Worked for me! My emote is strength.   

 
November 25, 2005, 7:34 pm CST

Workplace bullies

Quote From: msfree

I have 37 yrs experience, 16 here. I have always been considered a good employee. Then I came here. Most hateful, insecure coworkers, and really twisted supervisor. They finally got their chance and fired me. I applied for unemployment and was denied, then won the appeal. I have now filed w/ the EEOC. I will not quit until I have won it all. It is so wrong for this type of thing to go on and I will not tolerate it. For those of you who are having problems, do something about it. There are many tools out there to help you. Go up the chain of command with respect for each individual, but be firm. Then go outside the firm to an attorney. Worked for me! My emote is strength.   

But that doesn't work when the person is sleeping with the higher boss.  No matter what I did I was not going to get anywhere.  In the long run I did win, because I got to retire.  She thought she won over me, but I am the happy one.  She is still having to go to work every day and has a new boss!  But she is working and coning her way with this person, as I have been told.  My thing is, what goes around comes around and sooner or later it will catch up to her.   

  

Thanks!  I would have gone that route too.  Glad I didn't have to. 

 
November 26, 2005, 4:11 pm CST

Miserable Lunch Ladies

    

    I am certainly not the most confident person, and I will say that ten years ago, I was less so. That said, the lack of respect and meaness I found in my school district's elementary and high school cafeteria was insane. Each kitchen had one cook that was a total tyrant, berating and belittling workers and students alike. The cook at the elementary school terrified the children with her loud comments, orders, threats, and (in her mind ) humorous jabs at students. She was such a control freak, she'd stand over me my first week or so and scream at me to go faster ( ladeling food ) or hold the utensil in a different way, or whatever. I've worked in restaurants, I'm a mother, and I understand and appreciate hustle. This woman and the one at the high school cafeteria were very much the same and bullied and berated even when work was done well, just because they could. Why? I don't know, in my opinion these women were twisted. There were plenty of other ladies doing their work as efficiently and capable of doing these toads' jobs just as well that had pleasant demeanors, and could somehow let the hostile atmosphere roll off their backs as I could not. I could have been happy working there if not for their vulgar ways. It was hard work (much more than simply serving food), but it was a pleasure serving and interacting with the students and school staff. I still do not understand how the supervisor tolerated and condoned their behavior. I believe she was a toad as well. Jeez, I was happy when i first began this post, now I'm disgusted all over again. But you know, I just think there are always those unavoidable  people in our lives, and thankfully, the sweet far outnumber the hostile. 

 
November 27, 2005, 9:07 pm CST

Workplace Bullies

Quote From: utahinbc

Oh, I forgot to add:  this man went through 6 admin assistants in 6 months.
I have been an Admin Asst at the same company for almost 4 years. I have been stressed out because I bend over backwards and go out of my way to do whatever I can to keep my boss happy. I feel as though I am walking on eggshells and no matter what I do it is not enough. I am just now starting to get my resume out their to other companies. It's such a shame because I really like where I'm at and I get along very well with everyone else. I am tired of not feeling appreciated. Hang in there....it's nice to hear that there are other people out there going through a similar situation.
 
November 28, 2005, 12:12 am CST

Workplace Bullies

     Having worked at my present job for over15 years. I know a lot about bullies. As soon as my first boss retired, in came another one, who, having been here less than a month,  preceded to downgrade my performance. That supervisor eventually left, only to be followed by yet another bully. With the help of someone else who thought she knew more than anyone else, they tried their best to get me to throw in the towel. Yet, here I am.  

  

     My present "supervisor" ("micro-manager" is more like it) I avoid like the plague. Just because I refuse to put my business in the street (i.e. tell her all about me, which is NONE of her darn business), with the blessing of the HR manager, she decided to put me on probation,  When I left her office, I said to myself, "Lady, you just declared war." From that day on, I made it a point not to be in the same room with either of them. I refuse to make eye contact with them, I will not engage in casual conversation with them. Also, this person is a major time-waster, constantly creating work for others, yet overlooking some very important (and I might add, obvious) factors. It is not uncommon for me to miss incoming calls while she insists on talking to me about some upcoming "project" (something I've done a hundred times) that she will invariably give to me at the last minute. Yes, I can relate.  

 
First | Prev | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Next | Last