First of all, did the mother actually trick him in the sense of the word, or was she really unsure who the father was. I don't believe that she should have kept her affair to herself. She should have confessed it to Enrique. Did she not tell him because she still loved him and didn't want to lose him? This doesn't excuse her because this must have haunted her inside to some point.
My problem is that it's not just the sperm alone that make you a father. The father is the one who raises the child. He is the one who feeds, changes, plays and nurtures them. Even though it is a terrible thing that happened and a shock to him, it is not the childs fault. She is his daughter and he is her father. Her biological father is the sperm donor.
As far as I'm concerned, Enrique walking away from his daughter the way he did is a far worse crime then what his exwife did. This child was all of 10 years old. How could she have understood the reasons.
Taking her to a park and telling her was totally unacceptable. He should have sat with the mother first and discussed how they were going to tell her. They should have told her together. Just the two of them.
He should have ensured this child that he still loved her. He should've never stopped seeing her. He is the daddy. Her daddy, the only daddy she ever knew. Until this point he thought of her as his daughter and should never have even thought different, even though he isn't the biological dad. He raised her as his own.
I feel, he should pay child support because of the relationship they had. This for the love of the child. To go after the biological father at this point is pointless. If he doesn't want to give the money to the mother, and I can understand his mistrust of her. He could be told of Selena's needs and go with Selena to get them. This again, because he loves her.
It's sad that this happened to him but he is the adult and must swallow it for the child, not the mother.
The mother will have to live with the guilt of what she has caused forever.
I feel the new wife of Enrique has too much to say., She dictates to him how she feels and he believes her words and intuitions. Well, she is the 3rd party in this and should let him think for himself. He is a pretty insecure person to not be able to think for himself. This is putting it nicely. It is nice of Chris to want to adopt her, but in Selena's eyes she had a father and he is still living.
This whole issue should not involve the new partners. They should step back. This is for the mother and father to deal with. The anger and the deceit towards each other should be between them and not the child. The child is the one who's suffering the most, unnecessarily. Whether, she'll be able to ever heal totally from this terrible mess will be seen in the future.
I think that Enrique should step up and pay for the child's sake.
The mom, well she'll have to live with her deceitfulness and the payback she will get, will come to her in one way or another. God will give her the pennance. What comes around goes around and payback is usually not very nice.
In all of this, the important person to think of, is Selena. What is best for her. She is the victim here.
Let us not forget that we as adults are to protect our children. I think this child has suffered enough.
God bless her!
It's too bad that money is such a priority in our lives that we will make it more important then our children.
What a sad, sad world we live in.
(Original Air Date: 10/29/07) Fraud. lies. conspiracy. They may sound like the latest Washington scandal, but these are allegations of exes at war over child support. Dr. Phil's guests claim they became victims of the perfect crime when they were led to believe they fathered a child that was not biologically their own and were forced to pay. First up, Enrique says he was shocked and angered to discover he was not the father of his youngest daughter, Selina, and that she was conceived during his ex-wife, Maria's, adulterous affair. Maria says he raised Selina but then abandoned her to save money. Why does Maria say Enrique's current wife is to blame for the fractured relationship? Next, 13-year-old Selina speaks one on one with Dr. Phil. Will she decide to let the man she once called Daddy back in her life? Then, Carnell Smith, who uses the online moniker, "Man4Justice," suffered a similar fate to Enrique, and but he fought and won. He says he's tired of seeing women trap men and get away with it. A heated debate ensues between him and feminist attorney, Gloria Allred, who argues that men like Enrique should continue to act as the father ... and continue paying! Talk about the show here.
