Topic : 12/25 Parent Trap

My heart just goes out the young lady that was so hurt by both of them. I think that the mom should own up to her part in this matter. She was very happy to put blame on Enrique. I do think that the way he handled it was truly out of anger and he was not thinking about the pain and heartache his actions would cause this child. I Think that we have all done things that we are not proud of but if we learn from that experience and admit when we do wrong it makes us  better. I really would like to have a few minutes alone to talk to this mom because I would have a lot to say to her. First I would tell her that I am a mom that has gone though a divorce and my ex-husband is a dead-beat dad. So I think that for moms that struggle with that would think that she gives us hard working honest moms a bad name.! She is just sorry that she was caught!!

To Enrique think about this most men can have biological children but it takes a REAL MAN TO BE A DAD!!!  To be a Great Dad takes more than a piece of paper, it take someone with an open heart to realize that children are gifts to us..I am glad that my new husband (that has no children of his own) is a Great Dad to (our ) daughter, since her biological father is not. I hope that the mom owns her part in this matter soon and maybe if she does that it will help her daughter heal from this. I also think that the real father should know so that he has a chance to be a Dad.

roobugsmom/ Nev

For all you women out there who are carry a child and you aren't sure who daddy is or messing around with more than one man let me tell you be prepared!  This is what happens when you don't tell your partners what is going on!  So, you messed up and slept with more than one guy it's better to fess up and deal with it now rather than 10 years or more down the road!  He will be mad at you if your in a realtionship, but at least he'll be prepared.  I'm lucky I've always been smart enough/mature enough to know the meaning of my marriage vows.  As far as the guy who ran out on that darling girl well, grow up.  No I don't think you should pay childsupport.  Yes, the state should go after the real dad.  If she wants you in her life than be in her life for her.  As far as mom goes you are selfish, greedy, and a lier.  He doesn't owe you a dime and I think you should have to suffer the actions you have taken.  You say you care about how this effects your daughter, well you should have thought that when you spread your legs!  I have no respect or sympothy for you.  Kuddo's to the step dad for stepping up and at least trying to build a relationship with this girl.  You are a good man.  As far as the girlfriend goes butt out!  This is not your fight.  When we all can fess up that we aren't perfect and we mess up the world will spin a little lighter.

As a father with 2 daughters this show really caught my attention.  I have both of my daughters half the time.  I actually had to fight in court to half the timeshare I do.  It completely disgusts me that some women use children for financial gain.  I was married to my oldest daughter's mother.  We divorced when she was 3 years old.  Despite the court order only giving me an every other weekend timeshare, we immediately decided to have a 50/50 timeshare.  Meanwhile, I was paying full child support.  After 2 years having my daughter half the time, my compensation plan at work was cut by 40%.  I told my ex that I would no longer be able to pay her the child support and I would split my daughter's expenses with her equally and I would also continue to pay the health insurance.  Long story short...she filed for back child support and won a judgement.  I in turn filed a motion explaining we had never followed the court order and I proved that I did have 50/50 custody by virtue of daycare log sheets.  My ex tried to say that I was unfit and the judge saw thru her lies.  He asked her if she felt I was unfit then why did she allow me to have her half the time for the past 2 years.  The judge cancelled the child support and granted me the 50/50 custody that I already had been experiencing.  In this case, it was obvious that all my ex wanted was money!!!! 

I have my youngest daughter half of the time also, however, her mother recieves nearly $600/month.  She works a part-time job on purpose so she can continue to receive child support.  She is clearly manipulating the system!

I feel Enrique could have showed a lot more tact and care when explaining the situation to his daughter.  I do not think the courts should have the right to force a person, man or woman, to bear the financial obligation of a child that is not theirs!  The mother is clearly scandalous and is the person ultimately responsible for this awful situation.  Enrique and his daughter, if they choose, can have a wonderful relationship and finances do not have to be a part of it. 

Gloria Allred really seemed to be avoiding the issue at hand.  She is nauseating! 

I was very surprised at Enrique's desire to emotionally cripple his daughter(s). Let him off the hook for child support but make him pay for all the therapy this child is going to need as a result of indulging his wounded pride by injuring a little girl . While his ex-wife may have lied to him about his paternity, his new wife wins the immorality contest hands down. I was shocked and angered into yelling at the television when she referred to the daughter as, "it." Her direct quote is as follows," The moment I saw Selena I knew that It was not his biological daughter and I felt he should know the truth." Evidently Mia isn't happy enough with just having Enrique as a husband but feels she must totally monopolize his affection by creating drama and conflict and alienating him from other relationships. If she were just vilifying the ex-wife, I wouldn't care, but to use his daughters as pawns and destroying his relationship with them is unconscionable.

The mother was a jerk for cheating, a jerk for lying, and a jerk for continuing the lie. I think anyone who commits that kind of fraud should be held accountable and it would serve the mother right if she were prosecuted or sued. Nonetheless, I cannot get past that Enrique and Sabrina lived as father and daughter for 10 years and he could just cut the bond like that. I believe there is true regret on his part and he is absolutely a victim, but justice or not, as a grown man with a conscience how could he knowingly hurt that innocent child? My heart breaks for Sabrina. Yes, everyone agrees the mother is responsible for starting the whole thing, but I can't imagine anything more important than preserving that father/daughter relationship. The mother was a jerk, but 'm disgusted none of the adults took a higher road in the best interest of the child.

Also, am I the only one who thinks Enrique's current wife had an agenda of her own? What kind of woman looks at her husband's child, questions his paternity and convinces him to have a DNA test? Maybe I missed something, but It didn't sound like Enrique brought it up first. I know lots of people (fathers and mothers) who don't look like their kids. If it occurs to me to question their parentage, I hope feel ashamed for going there and keep my mouth shut.

Dr. Phil wouldn't tell Enrique's wife if he thought she was right or wrong, but I'm curious what he really thinks. To me, opening that can of worms was an awful, hurtful, bordering on evil thing to do, to both father and daughter. Regardless of how much of a jerk the mother is, Enrique and Sabrina had a father/ daughter relationship before the new wife came along. Enrique had a right to know, but Mrs. did not have an obligation to force him to. At the end of the day I wonder how both he and Sabrina would answer the question: If you could go back to when you believed you were father and daughter, do you wish you had never found out the truth?

Dr. Phil,

I must admit I generally watch reruns of King of Queens during your show, but today the Hefernons were rather boring so I scanned the airwaves, landing on the Parent Trap episode of your show.  I am a nationally recognized author of a book that was written to help young people champion over the perils of their youth, but this is an issue I cannot seem to conquer in my own life.  I am at the tail end of a divorce from woman that I have been married to for nearly 18 years.  I was 20 and she 19 when we married in 1990.  We share four children together, and I have raised her daughter from a previous relationship, since she was two years old, now 20.  In my soul I believe my children are mine, but women like your guest today, Maria, serve as a reminder that is OK not to trust, devote and completely give your heart and soul to a woman.  I am exhausted from this feeling.  I feel like everyday of my marriage I woke up wondering if my children were mine.  I have not only been their father, but have been "daddy" since the day each of them were born.  There have been several splits in the relationship between my future ex-wife and I, and at each split she became pregnant.  I recently learned of an affair that she had in 2007, but it was with someone she has known and has been with on and off since 1990.  It was painful for me to watch what your male guest went through because I understand the dilemma he is facing.  His knee-jerk reaction to cut off visitation with his daughter was rooted in pain.  It was the only way he could show his ex-wife how much she hurt him.  Once he was able to process the pain, he was able to understand that the child is not a weapon to be used to hurt his ex-wife.  But how is a man able to show a woman like Maria how truly hurt he is by her actions?  I believe there is no greater harm one human being can do to another than what Maria did to her ex-husband.  I am a writer, but have no words to describe the type of person who would do that to someone.  May I submit that your guest reacted in such way because he is a real man that was truly, deeply hurt.  My youngest child was conceived during a "break" between my wife and I.  It has been eight years, but I have questioned the paternity.  However, one week ago I signed paternity paperwork, without requesting a paternity test.  I love this child, with my entire soul, and although I questioned the paternity, I was willing to sign the documents.  Each day I wonder if I will end up like your guest, but in the meantime I am spending one day at a time loving, nurturing and raising my children.  Divorce is ugly, and it brings out the worst in people, except children, they somehow seem to bring a rainbow after the storm.