Topic : 12/25 Parent Trap

ENRIQUE HAVE THE RIGHT THE FEEL THE WAY HE DOES, MY QUESTION IS , WHY IS  MARIA ON HIM ABOUT CHILD SUPPORT, WHEN ENRIQUE CAN BE THE FATHER IN SO MANY WAYS, MINUS THE CHILD SUPPORT MONEY.     WHY  IS THAT SO HARD TO DO.  IM SURE ENRIQUE WILL HELP  SELINA WITH ANYTHING SHE NEEDS WHEN IT COMES TO MONEY BUT HE DOES NOT HAVE TO BE LEGALLY

RESPONSIBLE FOR IT.  THE BIOLOGICAL FATHER SHOULD BE RESPONSIBLE FOR  SELINA.   ENRIQUE SHOULD NOT PAY FOR MARIAS SINS PERIOD. 

 

LIKE THE SAYING GOES, THE LORD WILL NOT PUT US THROUGH A SITUATION WE CANNOT OVERCOME AND SELINA BELIEVE IN THE LORD AND HE WILL GUIDE YOU THROUGH YOUR YOUNG LIFE AND OVERCOME THE PAIN AND HURT YOU ARE GOING THROUGH RIGHT NOW.  GOD BLESS YOU SELINA AND MAY YOU HAVE A HAPPY LIFE.

 

I do not understand why people lie.  They need to be help responsable for their lies.  It affects so many  innocent lives.  No one else should pay for her lies

Simply, a lie is a lie is a lie.  Stop the lies.

I think that he should not have to pay for this child that is not his.  Men get the bad end of everything.  Women have it made when it comes to child support . I think it is wrong that  a man has to pay for a child that is not his and that our system would let this happen.  I do feel sorry for the little girl, it is not her fault.  Her Mother should have to pay him back for anything he has paid for so far.  Women really don't step up and take responsibility for anything.  The men always get the raw end of the deal when there is a divorce, or child custody.  And the children suffer too.  Women think that men owe it to them.  Nobody thinks of the children.  I really wish women would step up and take responsibility for their actions.  I really wish that the children heal from all of that they have been through.  I also wish that their mother would have to pay for her part of it.  I also feel that the father is getting a bad deal.

The older I get the more wisdom I find in idioms.  The one I find appropriate for this situation is “the sins of the father/mother will be visited upon the head of the child.’  It’s more than apparent that both of these people hold responsibility for the pain, disillusionment, betrayal, and future issues this child will endure.  Is one more responsible than the other?  Does it really matter?  I could sit here and argue one point or the other, if I wanted to but I don’t, and it would make no difference because the damage is done.  The cat is out of the bag, genie is out of the bottle, etc.  It’s a done deal.  What concerns me is that it continues being done here as well as in many other similar situations that haven’t found the good fortune of Dr. Phil intervening on the child’s behalf.  So instead of adding my bat to beating these people up over what already cannot be undone I’ll instead send my most sincere hopes and wishes that better judgment will now rule and that life can be mended to all their benefit.

What I came for is propose a solution that seemed glaringly apparent to me.  It won’t correct the current occurrences of like events but it can curtail it for future generations.  First of all a birth certificate is a legal and binding document so I’m amazed that this hasn’t become common practice before now.  Why a person can simply be named on a legal binding document without proof of that person’s party to paternity is simply legally irresponsible on all sorts of levels.  At any rate my solution is to add paternity testing to the standard testing that they do on any infant when it is born.  Problem solved.  Perhaps such a solution might have further benefits of being a deterrent to behavior that would so negatively effect so many others outside themselves for so long after the fact.  Accountability – what a concept!  For those who oppose this solution one would have to question their motivation and wonder if there may not be some duplicitous reasoning that would cause such opposition.  It’s easy to rant over a problem, everyone does it.  Better to just resolve it and get on to the next issue.  There’s always going to be plenty more waiting in line…

Hi,

My name is Jenn  and i just want to give a character testimonial for Mia. I met Mia in our seminary school and i have had the privilege of sitting besides her and working together on our readings and just figuring our 'stuff' out. She is a wonderful person. She is ethical and kind and doesn't seek out to hurt anyone. It is truly shocking to me to read some of these posts. How can people pass such judgment when they don't know Mia personally or Enrique. No one really knows the truth except the people involved. It is my wish that everyone find peace in their lives and people stop blaming each other and look for the change within themselves. Good luck to everyone...And now i leave you with my favorite poem that seems fitting today..Enjoy!!

People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered.
Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful you will win some false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you.
Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight.
Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous.
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow.
Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough.
Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the end, it is between you and God;
it was never between you and them anyway.

I can't believe this show and Dr. Phil's response. Why is anyone blaming the father???? The mohter is to blame for all of this. The daughter should be angry at her mother not this poor man who was lied to. The daughters sound like they are parrting what they have probably heard their mother say. Some mother she is. All she is interested in is easy money!!!! Why doesn't she pursue the real father for $. This type of woman makes all women look bad. She should be put in jail for fraud!

I can't beleive that fathers can simply stop being a father because the blood is different.  My dad paid childsupport and accecpted me as his child and still does even though he is not blood related.  a father is made a father through his actions and love and that is it!!!  Go see your daughter because you will never get that lost time back!!!!

I think it's sad that Selena had to go through all of this. I'm not sure I agree with Enrique asking for a paternity test this late in Selena's life.

However, I'm glad that Dr. Phil is covering this issue. Legal systems and our society regard single fathers as being low on the totem pole, regardless of any malicious doings by the mother. Fathers are treated like common criminals in family court and I think that it is very wrong. Rarely are single mothers held accountable for their actions. To often custodial parents use their children for revenge and blackmail. It's time that the courts treat both parties fairly and truely act in the best interests of the children.

People can argue that they understand what this woman did.  She was afraid her man would leave her.  Well, she should have been worried.  None of this would have happend if she would have just told the truth.  Would he have left?  Maybe, but single moms raise children everyday, and he still would have been responsible for the first.

As a parent, I can honestly say that one of the reason's that children are so important is because they are a sign of the love you share with the co-parent.  Ideally.  I love my son,more than anyone has ever loved anyone, but I don't even begin to know what I would do if I found out he was a product of my huband's betrayal.  My entire world would be shatterred, and the son I love so much might become a sign of heartbreak and hurt.  Luckily I am a woman, and I would NEVER cheat onmy husband, and even if I did, I would have the courage to admit it.

Let's also not forget about another possible victim:does the realfather know he has adaughter?

This show really hits home for me. As my dad did this to me at the age of 39, I tried to get him to do the test to prove he was my dad but he refused,,I think he just likes to use this to hurt me.and to get back at my mom as they have loved to hate each other and pull us kids in since there divorce and they have been divorced since i was 5 or 4. He see it as most likely am not his , most of this came about when i had a huge fight with my older sister who he is very close with ( she is daddy,s girl ),,he sided with her with the words well I don't think am your real dad, wow ! But he isn't man enough to do the test, I think cause he doesn't want to be prov en wrong,,this way it is always there to throw at me and my mom, how bad is this I am middle child of 8, go figure. Best thing is for the girl to stay away so she isn't hurt any more, at least she knows the truth.I wish the best for her.