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Topic : 12/25 Parent Trap

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Created on : Friday, October 26, 2007, 02:49:00 pm

Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original Air Date: 10/29/07) Fraud. lies. conspiracy. They may sound like the latest Washington scandal, but these are allegations of exes at war over child support. Dr. Phil's guests claim they became victims of the perfect crime when they were led to believe they fathered a child that was not biologically their own and were forced to pay. First up, Enrique says he was shocked and angered to discover he was not the father of his youngest daughter, Selina, and that she was conceived during his ex-wife, Maria's, adulterous affair. Maria says he raised Selina but then abandoned her to save money. Why does Maria say Enrique's current wife is to blame for the fractured relationship? Next, 13-year-old Selina speaks one on one with Dr. Phil. Will she decide to let the man she once called Daddy back in her life? Then, Carnell Smith, who uses the online moniker, "Man4Justice," suffered a similar fate to Enrique, and but he fought and won. He says he's tired of seeing women trap men and get away with it. A heated debate ensues between him and feminist attorney, Gloria Allred, who argues that men like Enrique should continue to act as the father ... and continue paying! Talk about the show here.

Find out what happened on the show.

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cindypoo888

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December 25, 2007, 5:07 pm PST

12/25 Parent Trap

I am concerned that mothers who successfully prove that frauduent behavior is monetarily rewarded is sending a really bad message to our young women in this matter. A child is undoubtedly deserved to be held unaccountable for the parent's problems, however, the bottom line isn't just that the child deserves to be protected from being emotionally hurt, but also psychologically from learning that unconditional love means that it is also ok to sweep a lie under the carpet. I believe that we can go too far in "protecting" our children... Shouldn't we invest in our children the truth? Are really helping them if we are in essence teaching them that they are not worthy of knowing the truth? How far will we go to "protect" our childen? One should find a way to reveal the truth and do it in a way that won't harm a child--In a controlled environment. That child has a right to know who in his or her immediate environment hasbeen deceptive. The father who has been defrauded against has a right to have his self validated for being significantly wronged! Only when the truth comes out can healing begin.

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vicpacheco

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December 25, 2007, 5:08 pm PST

No excuse for woman

I am so tired of women who lie about who the father is to a child, they start the whole problem, but somehow manage to push blame onto the man who in situations like this was a victim, and Allred I am so tired of her butting into every issue giving her two cents = bottom line the woman lied, she should be held responsible, made to pay back the man, and if the child wants to continue the relationship with her "father" let them, without the financial responsibility.

Gloria tries to always change the subject when in the hot seat to another issue related to the topic, please don't have her on again, she is annoying

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1FAMLY

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December 25, 2007, 5:13 pm PST

I FOUND 1 'MOTHER'

Quote From: takeabreak

In some cases it is not the fault of the women. When my 3rd child was born I had been seperated for quite some time from my now ex husband. When he was born the hospital told me that the only person I could legally put on the birth certificate was my (now) ex husband since we were still legally married. I explained to them that he was NOT the father and that we had been seperated for quite some time but the reply I got was "thats the law, your husband has to be listed on the birth certificate or left blank". I left the space blank because I knew he was not the father and was not going to put someone down that was in no way responsible for the child. The state came in afterwards and tried to sue him for child support. He then had to go to court and fight the matter and pay those expenses plus the price for a paternity test. In my opinion, he should have never been put through all that. From day one I have told everyone (including the state) who the father was and they have yet to go after support etc from him. I will not go after support from him because we are managing fine and would rather not have him in my sons life (because he has addiction problems) but I dont believe anyone should be financially responsible for a child that is not theirs.

I APPLAUD THIS MOTHER FOR DOING "THE RIGHT THING". I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW THE STATE IN WHICH SHE RESIDES SO I COULD EMAIL THEM TO EXPLAIN "THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN RIGHT AND WRONG" and hopefully one of their legislatures might read these messages and realize what "A - - ES" they have in their state government.--THANX-1PAPA

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abi_phil

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December 25, 2007, 5:15 pm PST

Maria should feel some shame

As a female I am embarrassed for her. She looked so proud, proud of what deceiving a man and her children. It was wrong to have the affair, it was wrong to lie to a man and her daughter for her own convience.

I feel bad for Selina she is a beautiful young girl, but I do not think Enrique should be paying any money for being decieved. Her mother should get two jobs and support her daughter. She has created such negativity in her daughters life, she should take responsibility.

The laws need to be changed.

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fooloof

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December 25, 2007, 5:15 pm PST

The Child is Most Important

In this case, the woman was obviously wrong for tricking her husband; on the other hand, the father, while not legally wrong, certainly was immature for revealing to Selena that he was not her father. First of all, she was too young; second of all, it doesn't help her. As long as she has a father to love her, that's what's important. I also think that Enrique knew that he probably wasn't the father. When his new wife suggested that he get the test, if he had really believed taht he was Selena's daughter, he would have told the wife to take a hike. ? All you fathers think about it. If your new wife says "the kid doesn't look like you", what would you do? Are you going to run out and get the test? Not unless you've already strongly suspected that you weren't the father. I think he only pulled the DNA card once the child support issue came up. Also, Selena sounds coached by mom. Phil asked "what was your reaction when you found out?" She said "I couldn't believe that he would do someting like that." That's a pretty sophisticated thought for a 10 yr-old to have. The child would feel like her entire world came crashing down on her. Anyway, in this case, Enrique got to enjoy the benefits of having the child: raising her, sharing laughter, tears, and memories. For all intents and purposes, she was his child, and I think he should keep paying.

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dirtbikejim

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December 25, 2007, 5:15 pm PST

accountable

This man is definitely morally and emotionally obligated to "his" daughter and he should continue with proper therapy to support that, however he should be monetarily reimbursed by the deceitful mother and the biological father jointly for the ten years of support he provided and he should in no way be monetarily responsible for the child's support from this time forward.

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custodial_dad

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December 25, 2007, 5:15 pm PST

12/25 Parent Trap

Quote From: blackane

If a man doesnt pay his child support he is held legally responsible. If a woman "fraudualently" obtains child support nothing is done. Mothers should have to re-emburse the child support and then they can seek child support from real father. I missed two payments of child support for my daughter and my driving privleges were suspended. I moved in with a woman and her sons father was $15.000 outstanding in his child support and nothing was done. When she informed Child Support Inforcement Agency a service up here in Canada and they had no disire to go after the money. Infact no one really wanted to help till she informed Mothers Allowance a Family and Social Services program. Because, my then, girlfriend was on Mothers Allowance the outstanding debt was actually owed to them. It didnt take them long to see to it that the debt was paid. After that, his payments were suppose to come directly to her but it was a fight every month to get him to pay. Had a new wife, new children and a five bedroom house so it wasnt even a matter of him affording his son.

So again, if a man doesnt pay his child support he is held legally responsible. If a woman "fraudulently" obtains child support vitually nothing is done.

I'm sorry to hear that her ex is like that, I pay over $1300 a month and would never thing of not paying, I may not agree to the amount, but would never hurt my daughter.

On the other hand I do not get a penny for my two sons from my first marriage becasue she had triplets from her present marriage, she to has bought a home as I am stuck live in an apartment.

As long as I can make my kids happy in life then that makes me happy. money as you know can cause major stress in a relationship, focus of the love of your kids and your girlfriend

Good luck to you both!!!!!

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onie530

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December 25, 2007, 5:19 pm PST

CHILD SUPPORT

This mother is in it for the money. She is greedy and uses the child to get what she wants. Enrique does not owe her anything. If anything, she should be paying him back the child support he has paid and for the DNA tests he had to pay for. The least she could do is let him be a part of this childs life and encouage the child to be a part o his life as well and not expect money in return. The woman was wrong from the very beginning. There are alot of woman who has done this the past and gotten away with it. They should be made to pay for the pain they have caused to the children and the men involved.

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hiddemjen

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December 25, 2007, 5:19 pm PST

Unfair

I personally think what this mother did was unfair and hurtful to everyone. And truthfully now if she was really concerned about her daughter she would let her see the man that she made her daughter believe was her dad without receiving child support. If it's not about the money but her daughter then it would be that way. This deceiver has nothing to lose with letting her daughter see the man she made to be the daughters father. If she is so upset about the money the take the real father back to court for support! She shouldn't blame a man who was there for her mistakes. Yes, maybe the way he told the daughter was wrong and mistakes were made on his part but if she was honest with him things would have been different from the beginning.

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1FAMLY

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December 25, 2007, 5:23 pm PST

BACK TO LAW SCHOOL

Quote From: sharihodges

Your rights are protected under 42 USC 652, under extrinsic fraud. False Paternity is protected under Federal Law.

MAYBE GLORIA ALLRED NEEDS TO GO BACK TO LAW SCHOOL AND TOUCH UP ON "FEDERAL LAW"-THANX-1PAPA

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