Topic : 12/25 Parent Trap

takeabreak-This is 1PAPA (1FAMLY) and i'm from IOWA, too. BOONE, IOWA-THANX-1PAPA

From personal experience:

Mom should pay NON-BIO Dad back

Bio Dad should be found for monetary reasons & emotional of the child

Non bio dad should continue some sort of relation w/ his kid's sibling

DNA tests should be required before Dad's nameput on legal document - birth cert

It's really that simple -

How can anyone expect this guy who was cheated on to be double slapped on the face

and require him to pay monetary support for a child that was conceived in an affair, unless the dad agreed from the get go

Mom needs to take responsibility find the bio dad,apologize to her ex husband, pay him back (that would make a man do it)and start getting financial help from the real bio dad.

to that lady attorney - the child is important but dignity for everyone and personal responsibility needs to happen  - this guy is gettng cheated twice and the child is cheated also - why in the hell would he have to pay on going child support for  a child he did not conceive.  WOW is that lady out there, I would be scared to death knowing she fights legally for others- she's way too emotional for her own good -look at the big picture- hello

 I was involved with 2 different men years apart from eacxh other. I was told that the youngest child was not theirs from mutal friends that knew but didn't know what to do with the info. The first time the son was about 8 and we contacted an attorney that thank God, put the child first. He made us look at what the ramifications would have on the child. The child support paying man was not about to put "his son" through that at any price. To this day he does not regret his decesion, later on, when the child was an adult, the mother had to come clean to the son during a medical emergency.

When this happened to me the second time I counseled my husband the same way the attorney had counseled me the first time. He also was not willing to put "his" 12 year old son though this and continued to pay child support until the child was 19.

The law does need to be changed but I cannot think of anyway it can be done without hurting the innocent child. I don't regret paying the child support, yes, I paid it we had joint accounts.

It's a new day. The show did not accompolish anything because the mother was not hearing it she just want her money which in other words its called greedy. All we know is what was said on the show but no one knows what has been said or done between both parties to become public. in both cases each parent is at fault to where the child is involved. It seems that no one is telling the child that she is loved and the other sibling also has feeling too. If you take one you have to take the other not meaning money its time. The mother is concerned about the money do I recall her being married to someone else; however, this is not the case she need not to rely on her ex-husband money. She need to take care of her mess and start earning her own income and take care of her children.

You have to be kidding me!  How in the world can anyone think it's okay for a man to be financially responsible for a child whose not his... especially since his wife had not disclosed that she had committed adultery?  She fooled him for nine years and now he's on the hook forever???  While I agree he has an emotional responsibility for the child and he made a grave error in the way he notified her of her parentage, he is not responsible for the sins of his ex-wife. 

That woman's smug expression and attitude on the show disgusted me.  How she could laugh and say that because she duped him for nine years, he has to pay forever (and the money is all she cares about)?

This just shows that all children should have paternity tests upon birth and only after the parentage has been confirmed should a man except the responsibility of being listed as the "father" of a child. 

BTW - I am a woman myself and would NEVER have foisted such a visicous lie on both my daughter and husband.  She is completely responsible for this whole mess and her daughter ought to be blaming her mother, not her "father".

Heres how I see it..and I am a father.

I feel that what the woman has done obviously is wrong...to deny both the gentalman and his daughter the right of knowledge is simply wrong, and irresponsible...Its not her right ( the mothers) to destroy the individual lives of these two people for her own self worth...

In this case, i feel he should not have to continue paying suport. HOWEVER....

If he had entered the relationship, knowing the mother was pregnant,  and the unborn child was not his, and was involved with the mother and the child from birth, assumed the responsibilities as father, and the title of Dad, he should be held to those responsibilities, even though he is NOT the biological father.

I feel if I was in the same situation, I would have bonded with this child, as did the child with me...I had been there, I was called DAD, I disciplined, and assumed all the other roles this child and actually the mother, needed for some 13 yrs and I am the ONLY man the child knew as his/her dad, then I should hold to that honor, and continue to be their dad. Even though I found out later otherwise.

But again , thats just me..some men feel a certain relief when they later find out a child is not theirs....more from a financial standpoint..and not a Human standpoint...Unfortunately, Money is the root of all evil as it is said, and the actual financial gain becomes more important then the childs feelings.

I know there are alot of women whom are possibly ashamed of  what they may have done in their lives, and the consequences have become a child, However, please remember this.....

Your consequences are not as involved as the feelings of hurt you may put your child, or the man you involve  through, in covering up your infidelities....

This is just my opinion..and I felt it was just something that needs to be said.

Respectfully,

The un4gvn