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Topic : 12/25 Parent Trap

Number of Replies: 3786
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Created on : Friday, October 26, 2007, 02:49:00 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original Air Date: 10/29/07) Fraud. lies. conspiracy. They may sound like the latest Washington scandal, but these are allegations of exes at war over child support. Dr. Phil's guests claim they became victims of the perfect crime when they were led to believe they fathered a child that was not biologically their own and were forced to pay. First up, Enrique says he was shocked and angered to discover he was not the father of his youngest daughter, Selina, and that she was conceived during his ex-wife, Maria's, adulterous affair. Maria says he raised Selina but then abandoned her to save money. Why does Maria say Enrique's current wife is to blame for the fractured relationship? Next, 13-year-old Selina speaks one on one with Dr. Phil. Will she decide to let the man she once called Daddy back in her life? Then, Carnell Smith, who uses the online moniker, "Man4Justice," suffered a similar fate to Enrique, and but he fought and won. He says he's tired of seeing women trap men and get away with it. A heated debate ensues between him and feminist attorney, Gloria Allred, who argues that men like Enrique should continue to act as the father ... and continue paying! Talk about the show here.


Find out what happened on the show.


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July 15, 2008, 8:26 am CDT

That's nice but...

Quote From: laurentsia

Here in Sweden, the childsupport is to the child, to make their life as positive as possible, it´s not for the mother.

I understand all the difficulties in this issue but I have to say that I feel that if he has been taking care of the child for ten years he ought to be willing to make her life positive.

The mother can´t use the money for things for anyone but Selina so he should be ashamed not being willing to continue to make her life positive!

It doesn't work that way in America.  The mother is using that money for a lot of things that don't have to do with Selina.  That is why she wants it.
 
July 16, 2008, 11:50 am CDT

Hope

I just saw the show. I believe that the "father" made a huge mistake with the way he told Selina that he wasn't her father. He clearly didn't think of the consequenses. I'm glad to see and hear that Selina doesn't blame herself for this. She's obviously more mature then her parents are.

I find it appalling to have to conclude that this is all about money!

You can't ever put a $ to the welfare and happiness of your child! That should be priceless!
I can only express my hope that the parents will grow up eventually.

Luckaly here in the Netherlands, things are different.

My parents got divorced when I was 9, and although they still aren't on speaking terms, they always had the best interest for the children in mind. Growing up in a split-up household is difficult enough for children.

 
September 19, 2008, 5:29 pm CDT

I need advice on child support issues!

I have a story that definitely needs publicity! There are Dad's all over that are getting the hammer put to them by the courts for child support while others get away with paying nothing! This is my story: The Child Support Enforcement (CSE) unit is failing huge! My oldest daughter is nine years old, my case entered the CSE when she was two. Since then I have received only a couple of payments. When contacting the CSE I was told her case had been closed, and that I needed to re-file, so I did it is now nearly six months later and I have heard nothing. Except they can not locate the father. Here is my boyfriends story: His ex filed child support on him. Somehow the CSE used only her sworn financial statement, never allowing him to fill his out. She made up numbers and forged documents, by doing this she was granted 1000 dollars a month for one child! This is from a man who has never made over 25,000 in a year and most years made a lot less. This figure is outrageous! The CSE also failed to give him credit for his three other daughters who he also was court ordered through the CSE to pay 800 per month. This does not make any sense to me: just because his ex lied and forged documents and claimed she did not know of any other child support orders, the CSE who placed both of these orders did failed to check there own system? How does this happen. His child support for both cases totals 18,000 per year which is more than he makes most years. How can one man be expected to pay that on his income? The real kicker to this story is he did not know there was a child support order until he was 1 year and 12,000 dollars behind. By this point he was in contempt of court. He was so overwhelmed and felt so helpless. While employed these payments were taken directly from his check often leaving him with only 40 percent of the net income. He was just falling farther and farther behind. So he filed four times for a motion to modify through CSE and all four times he was denied. He then became unemployed due to not being able to travel with his company, because of child support related issues. Because he has also lost his drivers license because of child support he had trouble finding a job. He is a heavy equipment operator and a drivers license is a necessity in his field. He finally received advice to file through the courts, and how to do it without paying the 185.00 filing fee which he obviously did not have. So he proceeded to do that about a month and a half ago. Well today he went before the Judge in Jefferson County and was sentenced to 180 days with the possibility of work release. It just so happened that he started a new job last Monday. And today he was getting his first pay check. The Judge did not even look at his motion to modify. I am very angry CSE claims to for the child’s best interest but it is all a joke! There is not one child involved there are seven and not one of these seven children will benefit in any way by him sitting in jail! We both fully believe in child support, but in a situation like this the system has failed everyone! I have been left to struggle to support my two previous kids and a child we have together. He watches the kids while I work, so now I do not have his income and do not know how I am going to arrange child care. If his payments were reasonable he would not be in this situation. I do not understand this at all. PLEASE HELP!

Thank you for your time,

Amy

 
November 3, 2008, 6:28 am CST

12/25 Parent Trap

I just saw the show. I think the reason people are talking about money is because it seems to be the only grey area. It's obvious that the mum shouldn't have lied about the paternity. It's obvious that the dad shouldn't have responded to the truth the way he did. It's obvious that the welfare of the child is the most important thing in this case. The reason people are talking about the money is because it's the one thing that isn't clear.  


 

My opinion is that the person who parents should pay for the needs of the child. While the dad was understandably angry with his ex-wife he seems to have really loved and enjoyed the time that he was a parent to Selina. Parenting is wonderful but it's not free. Staying up late to help your child with a paper is actually the fun part. Paying the tuition bill isn't. At the end of the day if you're lucky you can watch your child make something of themselves and say I paid for that education / beautiful smile / dance lessons etc. If you get to parent then you get to pay. As far as voluntary relationships go I wouldn't let some guy who doesn't help with expenses deprive me of my children for a weekend.
 

 
November 3, 2008, 6:29 am CST

12/25 Parent Trap

I just saw the show. I think the reason people are talking about money is because it seems to be the only grey area. It's obvious that the mum shouldn't have lied about the paternity. It's obvious that the dad shouldn't have responded to the truth the way he did. It's obvious that the welfare of the child is the most important thing in this case. The reason people are talking about the money is because it's the one thing that isn't clear.  


 

My opinion is that the person who parents should pay for the needs of the child. While the dad was understandably angry with his ex-wife he seems to have really loved and enjoyed the time that he was a parent to Selina. Parenting is wonderful but it's not free. Staying up late to help your child with a paper is actually the fun part. Paying the tuition bill isn't. At the end of the day if you're lucky you can watch your child make something of themselves and say I paid for that education / beautiful smile / dance lessons etc. If you get to parent then you get to pay. As far as voluntary relationships go I wouldn't let some guy who doesn't help with expenses deprive me of my children for a weekend. Because they are totally wanted all the time and they come with a mother attached. 

 
November 3, 2008, 2:00 pm CST

Better late than never

i got to see this show today (a year later than you but thats the UK for you)

 

I'm a massive Dr Phil fan but i have to say he went so easy on the woman who lied to her family for 10yrs regarding the paternity of her daughter. She knew she slept with someone else but failed to mention it to her husband. i was shocked the she didnt get an earfull from Dr Phil. He was probably protecting the young girls feelings but she deserved to be made to feel like trash in my opinion!!!! Dc Phil i exspected more from you!!!!

 

p.s and yes i agree the so called father handled things VERY badly also!

 

 

 
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