Topic : 12/25 Parent Trap

I can relate 100% to this show. I was told I was the father of a daughter from my ex-wife which was later discovered that I was not.

I have always kept in touch with all 4 children and have always been there for all 4, which the other 3 I knew from the start were not mine, but they still call me Dad. I call them regularly, send birthday/christmas cards/presents and also help with school supplies and such as I need to to be there as much as I can. They also have made comments of coming to live with me.

The lawyers can talk all they want about LAW, but the states also have to step up there responsibility with holding the mother responsible, finding the men they slept with, finding the father and holding the actual fathers responsible financially to support their children. My ex-wife has had total trouble with Colorado state on keeping on the actual fathers of the 4 children with getting child support and is always told that the state can't do anything. The states want to hold a man responsible to pay money for a child that is not his, but yet do not want to take the steps necessary to find the actual father. And then also not hold the mother responsible when she does not want to give names of possible fathers and continue to pursue an easy avenue on men that have done the right thing and continue to have contact with the child that they thought was theirs.

I have two wonderful sons.  When I got pregrant with my first son my ex-husband and I were not married

and we had broke up but were still haveing sex.  I was seeing someone else and so was he we were not dishonest with each other.  When we worked everything out we decide, which ends up being a bad decision on both parts, to get married right after I found out I was pregrant and I told him the baby may not be his.  H said he didn't care and married me anyway when the baby was born he refused to have a test done.  He was a great father to both of our boys until we divorced when the oldest was two and the baby was about six months.  After a year of fighting in court he then decided he wanted a test done and the judge denialed his request stating that he knew what was going on when the baby was born and he put his name on the brith certificate.  He nows doesn't see either child but pays his child support.  He has seen his kids in 10 years and me and the boys are doing just fine with out him around.  I do apperiate the child support and it is helping me and the boys while I go to school to make a better life for me and my children.

I am a mother of two small girls, and from day 1 a good mother thinks of her children first!  You must have had a sad experience to feel that all mothers are that selfish. It is not true.

It is sad that something like this can actually happen in this day and time.  We are in the same boat.   My husband found out after 14 years of raising his son that he was not the father (his son is now 18).  Even though he was hurt and upset at the mother, it didn't change his relationship with his son, he still lives with us to this day and doesn't want anything to do with his real mom.  The issue was never about money, it's about the child's right to know who their real relatives are.  To this day we still don't know who his father is and according to her she will take it to her grave.  It's a shame that it seems our children have no rights, our government has no laws in place to protect people from this injustice.  Right now the son in this matter is suffering, he had a right to know who his real father is.

The only thing the guy did wrong was break his relationship with her. The girl had every right to know the truth. It really doesn't matter when she found out because it would still be shocking and devistating. Maybe worse if she found out a lot longer. You can talk to Wynonna Judd and ask her. She found out when she was in her 30s! 

 

If she's worried about the money, she should find the real father. The woman didn't try finding the real father because she was too scared to let her husband know he wasn't the father and lied to him and made him pay and was OK with it! SHE is responsible for this mess. She's the one that lied and she's the one that knew the truth. She purposely kept it from him. She's the one to blame, not the guy.

 

If everyone is truly interested in the best interests of the child money should never be the first issue.  If proof exists that Enrique is not the biological father of Selina he should stop paying but only under strict circumstances.  If these circumstances cannot be met then yes, he needs to step up to the plate and pay.  Maria has to be healthy and able to work to support Selina (doesn't appear to be a problem here--her smirk makes me livid--childrearing is not a game).  Her net worth should also have to be revealed and looked at in the big picture--maybe she can manage just fine on her own.  If the biological father can be found, he clearly should bear some responsibility.  Enrique should not expect to be reimbursed any monies as experience sometimes has a price and he clearly made some mistakes as well.  Going forward the biological father and Maria should bear the financial responsibility.  Mending the relationship between Enrique and Selina should be priority and strongly encouraged.  With a rebuilt relationship there will be plenty of opportunity for Enrique to assist monetarily, and this way it can go directly to the child.  It's not always about the money!!!!!!!!!!!!  Shame on you Gloria Allred, I was embarrased for you today on the show.

 

 

I saw the episode today with Salina and her father, I do not know her pain. What I do know is this: my real father has been out of my life since I was two, he never paid a cent of child support to me or my mother. Now the person whom I call my father has been in my life since I was four. I did not know he was not my father until I was six; this did not change our relationship at all. He remains my dad until this day. His name is not on my birth certificate, but he is my father. There is no blood between us, but that doesn't matter.

My mother has unfortunately coerced other men to say that they are one of my siblings parent just so my sibling will not ask about their real dad. My mom is a manipulative liar. She will swear that so and so is their dad,when they really are not. She will have the real parent pay child support even though she will not let them see their child.

Paper should not matter in a person's heart, if he wanted to be a father to Salina,then nothing should of stood in his way! Come hell or waters high, he should of stepped up to the plate,even though he was hurt. Salina should mean everything to him, despite her mom's evil doings...

Wouldn't it be a novel idea if both the man that has been the functioning father in the childs life and the biological father went to the child and said, "Look, this is what happened in the past and we cannot change that, but what we can tell you is you have one more father!  We both love you, are here for you, will not desert you, and will help you in any way we can, along with your mother, to be the success we know you can be!!!"

 

Dr. Phil,

   I am just a good ole girl from Abilene, Texas who trains horses for a living, but hell even I can figure this one out!!!!!  Pretty simple solution!!!

      I feel that if more women are held responsible for the lies that maybe these young girls will think twice about doing the same thing.  I think that the only one that was up on stage not hurt, was the mom.  She got the nice husband to stand by her, the support and the child.  Shame on her.  I watched this show with my 15 yr old and made sure she knew that what that lady did was so very wrong.  I feel the child is suffering for the sins of the mother.  P.S. I sure love your show.

I think that we as a people should go back to basics.   Back to the birth certificate.  When the mother and child are in the hospital and the child is born , thier information can be put on the birth certificate, because it is known at that time.  The father & child should have an automatic DNA test at the time of birth.  Then if the father is the biological father, put his name on the birth certificate.  The father field on the birth certificate should be entered as unknown when it is not correct; or the mother can identify the correct male and have another DNA test.    Women need to step up to the plate and be honest.   I am a female and this gives our gender a bad rap for what appears to be not an insignificant problem.