Topic : 12/25 Parent Trap

Ok...yes Maria was wrong to not admit that the child was not Enrique's...and she had no excuse.  I believe...at the time she was doing what was best for her child.  The biological father was probably a good for nothing guy and Enrique was a more reasonable candidate for the 'daddy' position.  She most likely didn't tell him because she was scared. (that still isn't an excuse for what she did).  By doing what she did, she gave her child a father she wouldn't otherwise have and a sister who she became very close to in her 'family situation'.  The 4 person family they built gave the children the most beneficial relationship they could have grown up it.  However, she is admiting she was wrong.  What Enrique did was cold and very damaging to the daughter.  He was probably upset with Maria, but he shouldn't have made her suffer.  Adults need to resolve adult relationships and work out their situations without dragging the children into it.  The daughter was the victim in this situation and she will live with the outcome.  Enrique will move on and forget about her.  She's will forever suffer...she didn't have to.  This could have been Dealt with in a more productive and less child (emotional) abusing situation.  The only thing Dr. Phil didn't bring up is the other daughter.  She has and will continue to suffer from this situation also.  Enrique hurt both the daughters.  But somehow....nobody even thinks about how the second daughter is suffering.  She has to watch her happy family become unhappy.  She has to see her parent's split up, her sister disowned by her father. (can she even have the same relationship with him anymore?).  And...her sister hurt and left without a father.....then new ppl brought into the situation.(is she really ready for a new step-father or step-mother...not in my opinion).  And who was that outspoken white woman with Enrique...i couldn't tell if she was his woman or his lawyer.   Im only 21years old and im sorry to say...but these adults need to 'grow up'

Umm, yeah, it's the mother's fault 100%. The step mom never held a gun to Maria's head and forced her to get into bed with someone else while she was still married, and then keep it a secret that Enrique may not be the father.....Mia wasn't even in the picture then.

Just because the child lives with Maria doesn't mean she is taking responsibility for her actions. We don't know that she isn't badmouthing Enrique to her daughter every chance she gets. We don't know what is said.

Yes, maybe Enrique could have handled things differently, but we aren't the one who found out the wife cheated and got pregnant by someone else and that he child isn't ours......everyone reacts differently.

Hello I too think that it is selfish to hide something so important as paternity.  Our non bio child has a series of health issues, and this was one thing that alerted her father that she may not be his.  None of the problems she was experiencing was coming from him and the mother said it was him not her.

 

Bottom line, the lie will never get better even with everyone trying to hide the truth.  As the word says the truth will set you free.

 

God Bless!

Umm, yeah, it's the mother's fault 100%. The step mom never held a gun to Maria's head and forced her to get into bed with someone else while she was still married, and then keep it a secret that Enrique may not be the father.....Mia wasn't even in the picture then.

Just because the child lives with Maria doesn't mean she is taking responsibility for her actions. We don't know that she isn't badmouthing Enrique to her daughter every chance she gets. We don't know what is said.

Yes, maybe Enrique could have handled things differently, but we aren't the one who found out the wife cheated and got pregnant by someone else and that he child isn't ours......everyone reacts differently.

I do understand the LAW and the need for the child to be financially cared for until the age of 18. Fathers who were later proven NOT to be the biological father have been ordered to continue to pay support due to their relationship with the child; in the child's mind (and often the man's), the child is HIS. Let's face it, if these men do not pay, someone else will (someone else will be us taxpayers).

 

With that said, it's a touchy subject, ESPECIALLY when women (and many do) know that the man they say is the father is NOT the father. These women have committed both a moral and legal SIN and they should be extremely embarrassed and ashamed (sadly, many today don't even know the meaning of the words).

 

These women are the ones who created this mess by LYING. No lie is ever justified. The men should be able to sue the women for all the child support they've had to pay and they should WIN.  But HOPEFULLY, these men care enough about the welfare of these innocent children to stay involved and continue to be "fathers."

Very good post. Thank you.

Why is the mother always right, and the father wrong? And if stepmom wants the money to stay home so what. IT IS HER MONEY, not the ex wifes!!! She made a bad decission, the daughter, the ex and his wife shouldn't  pay for her decission.  Mothers everywhere who decide not to have the biodad in the picture go it alone.  Why should she be any different.  If the dad was the one to cheat, everyone would stone him.  It shouldn't be about man vesus woman.  We all should be accountable for our own actions.  If the mother loved Selina she wouldn't have played w/her life.

no the spouse should not have to pay child support if he is not the father of that child, I agree these women

should be ashamed of themselfs.   I mean who in there right mind would do that I am very interesting to see what will happen on todays show should be very interesting.

 

fietkau2

My ex-husband got remarried right after we divorced several years ago. He had no reason to believe the child (from his 2nd wife) was not his.

 

At first you couldn't really tell who the child looked like, but after a few months it was noticeable. She looked Italian and nothing like him. Neither father nor mother were of Italian descent. At that point my ex began questioning her about paternity of the child; she of course lied to him and told him the child was his. When they split and were going to court for child support my ex brought with him evidence that he could not have fathered the child; he had been at work on a tug boat during the time of conception.  He also said he would take a DNA test to prove he was not the father. The court told him, “Too bad it’s your child legally and you are responsible for support”.  (he signed the birth certificate and was married to her during the time she got pregnant) To top it all off his ex-wife laughed in court and told him out loud in front of the judge that it wasn’t his kid. Still there was nothing he could do.

 

Apparently the biological father was a good-for-nothing-bum and since she couldn’t get any money from him she decided that she would get it from my ex-husband since he made good money.

 

I support the DNA testing at birth for all new babies. As one person said, that way the mother knows a DNA test is eminent and would hopefully speak up before the child is born.

 

 

I think you need to re-look your "stats." Look at the percentage of women receiving welfare when no male is involved and you will not get those stats. Percentage wise, African American women make up the largest segment of American society on welfare (percentage wise). This is due to the disportionate number of babies born out of wedlock, often to young mothers. Those aren't MY stats; they belong to our U.S. Govt. May I suggest you visit any of official govt websites that deal with poverty.

 

And you are wrong again. NOT EVERY STATE goes after the father, if the father is even known. And many states do NOT have the woman go after the father. Florida asks for the name of the father and supposedly attempts to locate him. Sometimes he's not alive or simply doesn't exist (the woman lied). Sometimes he's incarcerated and has nothing to give (he's a taker and will always be). Sometimes expensive and time-consuming paternity tests are needed becasue the man denies it and the woman had multiple partners. I worked in the state system and have seen hundreds of women get on welfare with the state HOPING to locate and prove who the father is so they can collect. It's a LOSING proposition. We tax-payers AND the innocent children are the REAL losers, though.

 

And don't worry about being labeled a "racist." I've learned that those who profess to champion free speech, tolerance and diversity THE LOUDEST are often the ones who try to silence anything that does not fit into their little worlds. When they disagree, they yell "racist" to silence people. It's sad, but predictable. As long as you speak the TRUTH, you know in your heart the truth. What others think should not matter.