Topic : 12/25 Parent Trap

I think a mother in this situation should not ask for child support and do all she can to keep the man in the child's life.     Every woman in this situation can "make up" for her infidelity by doing what is right for her child, keeping the father figure is more important than money.   

 

 Gloria Allred is an embarrassment to all women lawyers.  (Just my humble opinion)

While I agree that money is the main reason for this obviously, I still do not think he should have to pay.  He was tricked and she should make the biological dad pay.  However, I also know for a fact how important it is for the child to continue to have a relationship with the man she called dad.  Shame on the mom!

after watching todays show i found  how i was effected as well as my brother and  sisters its hard on a child to deal much less understand  but  yet they  do and  even though my father and mother never married   in the state of  indiana  my father was  forced to pay  without a  paternity test done  now  even today  30 plus years later  my family still doesnt know  if our father is who we  grew up to believe him too and  this has caused  my family (brother&sister) stress because they want to know but  cant  find out  because my father  doesnt want to  he is  done  paying for the things that happend over 30 years ago sad  but true and today watching that show  althought  that  child  was  told  maybe wrongly its never wrong to  tell the one you love the truth   the mother was  wrong  the father was  wrong in the way he did it  and if the laws we live by today  can  not  be changed  to absolutly  give a man  or the child the right to know who their partents are then  we dont have laws that we all live by   and we arent any better  than the lies  that that lady caused her daughter  today today  i found  my family ordeal broadcast on the show  even though it was that family on air it was watching my family growing up all over again   but today my mother  is dead and my father is alive or the man i believe to be my father who i hardly had  any time with  growing up  because i might have been lied too  but either  of my parents  as well as  my  brother and sisters  who today  their   lives are still haveing long term effects  on even my newfews an nieces are facing  so todays  epasode  doesnt only effect  todays  people  but the family  from  here on out

I feel very sorry for Selina and Enrique. I do not think that Enrique should have to pay any more child support since the child is not his biological. I think they should go after the biological for that. I also think Maria should have to pay back something to Enrique for tricking him. As long as women keep getting away with this, it will continue to happen more and more. I know Enrique still loves Selina and wants to continue a relationship with her but at what price? Will he have to put up with Maria and her crap for the next 5 years? Will she interfere with his new lifeEnrique did do wrong when he found out by punishing Selina as well. I think he sees this now, but what people don't realize is that Enrique was very angry and hurt by all this, he is human and he let his emotions take over. Maria is lucky he didn't kill her like some men do in this world. Enrique is now trying to find out what is the right and wrong things to do. Maria acts like it is a joke and has this new guy and he wants to adopt Selina and every one will move on and be happy. She needs a lot of therapy and to get real. She does to much smiling and laughing to even see the damage she is responsible for.

I am surprised at you, Dr. Phil, for not telling her off and telling her to wipe that smile off her face and offer some kind of therapy. You had no problem telling Enrique where he went wrong, he needs therapy also to get the anger out. Enrique, Maria, other significants and Selina should deal with this in therapy and get to a place where they can be civil to one another.  Selna is very lucky to have 2 set of parents that love her very much. All these adults need to get their act together because one day Selina will graduate, get married and probably have children. When she does, she will want all of you in the same room at the same time, being loving and supportive as one big happy family. That is what she deserves out of all this.

I know this first hand, my husband have been separated for 5 years, not divorced yet cause of financial reasons, but I went to therapy then I put our son, who was 14 at the time in therapy, and his therapist got us to fight out our battles and today, our son has always had us in the same room, not arguing but getting along for his sake. Our son gets a little confused from time to time cause his dad and I are like best friends now but we wouldn't be if we all lived together again. My husband violated me and even though I forgave him, I could never go back and try it again, the trust was broken, and that is what we tell our son, who is now 20. We also explained that what happened between his dad and I was between us and had nothing to do with him. Selina was put in the middle and now the damage needs to be addressed by a very good therapist. Selina can grow  and learn very important values from this mess her mother created. She can also learn to move past the pain and resentments she has built up and become a very mature sensible adult.

We need to have some kind of new law stating that when women trap men into signing birth certificates, making him believe they are the father and then months or years later tell them "well the child isn't yours" or he finds out through a paternity test the child isn't, then the woman should have to pay him back for what he did put into that child and go find the biological father. So what if the biological father is a bum, let the child  decide if they want that father in their life or not, if they are old enough to do that or let CPS or the courts decide whether he is good enough. He was good enough at the time for the woman to get pregnant by them so he is good enough to be told he fathered a child and pay the consequences of those actions.

No one should be forced to pay for a child they did not father or be locked up for it just because they signed a birth certificate. How about the mothers out there who are suppose to pay child support but doesn't? Do you hear much about them in the news? All too often they get away with it and the fathers are working two jobs to support the children.  Some fathers don't even know where the mother is, they take off, get re-married and start a new family else where.  We should be treated equally when it comes to a child. If fathers get locked up for not paying, so should mothers.

My heart goes out to you Selina. Hang in there, God willing, things will get better for you.  

I was appauled by how this feminest woman lawyer kept forcing her attitute and not even listening to the gentleman next to her. Then she kept saying what's wrong with the world these days are fathers not standing up. This show has nothing to do with the natural fathers! All I can say is that poor little girl. And you can't tell me that her mother hasn't been feeding her with feelings towardsthe man she thought was her father.

It takes more than a sperm doner to make a father. If, after 10 years of being "Daddy", it comes down to a matter of money -- he had to be a lousy father anyway. Yes, Mom was wrong in not telling him if there was a question of paternity but he is more wrong now because he "pretended" to care for 10 years and sold out for a dollar. His new wife should not be involved! Shame on all of them for bringing a so-called father-daughter relation down to child support.

 

Anyone can be a father but it takes a real man to be a father.

              Hello,

 

                   Unfortunately, this is happening all over America.  I think that this is such a sad situation.  The number one priority should always be the children.  With that being said, I truly believe that fault ultimately lies with the mother.  The "father" also has to take some responsiblity too.  The mother knew in her heart of hearts that she had broken her marriage vows and had a child that may or may not have belonged to her husband.  She was obligated to tell the truth while the child was still innocent to the world.  Her husband was trying to be a husband.  He truly loved her unconditionly and therefore trusted her completely.  He shouldn't have felt the need to "question" his wife.  The problem lies with him on how he handled the reality of paternity once he found out the truth.   He point blank should have handled it much better with the child.  I feel that he haa the right to seek out who the natural father is and take legal action there, but still continue the relationship with the child.   The bottom line is is that there is child who really has three fathers.  Her natural father is out there somewhere.  Who knows if he even has clue that he hasa daughter.  I think that the mother is cheating that man out of responsiblity and the chance to know his seed.  The mother is wrong.  She should NOT cheat Enrique out of the child's life and she absolutely shouldn't make him continue to pay!!!!!   That choice should be left up to Enrique.  Themom should know better.  Women should not do that to a person.  Look what happens in the end.

 As a mother, even I can understand where Enrique is coming from. While he did go about it the wrong way, I am sure he was hurt and upset as well. We all know that when we are upset or hurt that we sometimes do not think clearly. I have 3 children, and I think that children have the right to know who their father really is. How about the other man? What if for some reason he never had any other children and wanted nothing more than to have a child? He, too is being cheated. Then, of course, there is the child, who ends up losing the most, how sad is that?!? I think the mother has manipulated her into not wanting to be adopted by Chris just to keep receiving the child support. Maybe not, who knows, but the blame does solely lie on the mother. She should have and could have said something when she was pregnant. Her daughter should be very upset with her, I know I would be. Men have rights too...why is it that we are the only ones who can decide about an abortion, and now we can make someone be a "biological" father too. Come on ladies....we should have more integrity and dignity.

Now days, a man should automatically have paternity tests done, no matter the situation. My son is 19. When he has children I myself will take the child to have dna tests done, so my son does not have to go through what so many other men do. If he chooses to raise the child as his own, I will support him 100%.

 If  women can get away with getting money from whoever theyput on the birth certificate what  can stop someone from justpicking the richest guy they know.  Maybe every divorce child support issue should  require a DNA test before any money gets paid to anyone