Topic : 12/25 Parent Trap

A highschool friend of mine got hit a few years ago with the fact that he had a 17 year old daughter that he knew nothing about  !!!!!!!!!!!!! at age 34 he was married with 2 kids of his own,  for 17 years the mother told him nothing ...... but he had to come up with alllllllll the back child support.......   the whole thing really put a strain on him, his wife, and their kids.       He paid over 18,000 $$              so ...............    I ask ..... is it fair to expect different treatment because the shoe is one the other foot ????????       The lying woman should have to pay him back !!!!!!!!!      Equal rights !!!!!!!!     it should work both ways !!!!!!!             The children ...... I often wonder how kids today can turn out ok !!!!!!               I feel how he broke of the relationship with the daughter was a bad bad bad decision !!!!!!!        but having been previously married to a habitual liar ..... i think i know how he felt.       It just troubles me to allways hear    "oh the poor woman forced to live on scraps"  so the courts keep uping the amount of child support.................   all to keep it "fair" ..........   truth is i know guys that are raising their daughters and the mother isn't paying a dime !!!!!!      but there's no  outcry of justice there............        bottom line ........... she lied      and got paid for 10 years for it .......... she should have to give the money back.        the daughter should seek a father image ....... either her dad of 10 years or her moms new victim.

i don't think anyone could say this any better!  i could not agree more!

The bio-mother did defraud her ex-husband in my opinion.  The exhusband doesn't deserve to be a father the way he treated the girl.  The new wife is an instigator.  And though I have always respected Gloria Allred for her fight for women's rights, using this show particular show to bring up deadbeat dads was way off base!!!!!!!!!!!! She said this was supposed to be about the girl/children and she made it something else.  My humble opinion is that the law should give men the a limited time to fight paying child support from the time they find out the child might not be theirs as long as they aren't idiots about it as was the case here.  If they've had a long standing relationship with a child as their own, why would they want to break that?  They shouldn't have to even if they stop paying the support. 

 

Sorry, this one had me venting!!

As much as I love to watch the Dr. Phil show, I didn't understand why certain things weren’t being said. The blame of this certain situation was being bounced around from one parent to the other, when in all honesty the blame should be placed equally on both parents. The father may have been lied to but he himself said on the show that he was told by his ex-wife that this child may have curly hair and darker skin. The mother in return say that she never told him that, what ever, he knew one way or the other that this child may not be his when it's all said and done. He then should have had a DNA test done after the birth of the baby. That's were the father went wrong, if your walking to father hood knowing what's on the table don't try and change the important things 9 years down the road all because you new wife say's you shouldn't have to pay, that was your choice and responsibility 9 years ago and it's your choice now. When you invest precious time into a child’s life the way he did, the way he handled the situation was down right wrong!!

The mother was just all out wrong, because she said she didn't tell him anything about the baby not being his. She lied all around; too many women do this mess every day! When you know you’re with child and you know that there were other chicken's in the hen's coop you need to be up front and honest about the father of the baby on the way. If the man your dating is excepting of this and he care's and love's your baby as if it were his own than let that be his choice. Because the choice he makes will be with him for the next 18 to 21 years. Expecting Mothers Do Right!!  Enough said about her, the end with that!

 

Now the father has signed all right away for this child, but yet he dose not want her step father to adopt her, her father doesn’t feel he should continue to pay child support but wants the daughter to keep his last name. Hell NO! You don't want to contribute to raising the child finically, has signed all rights away, and don't feel you should pay child support but there is a man willing to do what the father feels he shouldn't have to. The father has no say so any more. He is no longer the father of this child plan and simple!!!!

 

When you walk into a relationship like this be it man or woman, check out the playing field before you sign on the dotted line, because had everyone crossed all the T's and dotted all the I's before hand none of this would be going on now and this child would not be affected this way at all!!!!!

 

Dr.Phil:

 

I applaud your courage in bringing the controversial issue of paternity fraud to the public. It is a crime that has many victims, the duped father, the child whose life is completely changed, the siblings of that child, and the malevolent mother who continues to line her pockets as a result of lies and deceit.

 

I am a victim of paternity fraud in two ways, at age 53 I found out that I was adopted by my grandparents, that my sister is my real mother and I have no idea who my father is. Before that however, I became the 2nd wife of a man who thought he had 3 children. It turned out that he was the victim of paternity fraud and the youngest child is not his biological child. Like Enrique and Maria they divorced and he became responsible for child support. And the youngest child looked like my husband. In fact we had been featured in an issue of Men’s Journal magazine and when the reporter asked to see some family pictures I saw a picture of my husband’s former best friend, the man who fathered the youngest child born of his marriage, and asked him “David, when were you that heavy?” My husband David replied that the picture was of Jerry and his wife Sybil on the beach. So looks do not always reveal a child’s parentage.

 

Maria knew all along that there was another candidate for biological father sand paved the way to have Enrique accept the child as his and to not ask questions. The damage that Maria has done to this child is not even at the tip of the iceberg. What happens if the child eventually gives birth to a child with a genetic defect that does not run in her family, such as happened to Morgan

Wise who found out that 3 of the 4 children he believed were his  were not because they were afflicted with a genetic disease for which he did not carry the recessive gene. Or when the child turns 50 and all the aches and pains and illnesses such as heart disease, high cholesterol or others start happening and the child had no medical knowledge of her fathers background.

 

Marriage and support of children is a contract and no contract is enforceable if done by fraud. Maria defrauded Enrique so he has no responsibility to the child once he is divorced. He has acted In Parentis Locus during the marriage and provided support. That is all that is required, he is nothing more than a stepfather.

 

And if as Maria states, it is all about Enrique having to pay child support then why is he not disputing it for the child that is his biological child. I assume the older girl is his, there was no mention of a DNA test.  The fact that Enrique has an MD came out at the end of the show, and it is the perfect case of father shopping. Enrique could offer more financial stability then the man Maria was cheating  with, so she took the logical decision, stayed with the man that had more money and lied to him

 

As far as Enrique telling the child that he is not the biological daughter it is obvious that in 10 years plus the year that Maria was carrying the child was not enough time for Maria to reveal the truth.

Who would have told the child who deserves and has every right to know the truth about her biological heritage? In my husband, David Ziskind’s case  he confronted his ex-wife with the truth and she denied it, but told his two older children that your father is saying  that your little sister is not his to get out of paying child support. If my husband wanted to get out of paying child support, why would he not say all three children are not his? His older daughter called him up and said that if you do not tell Natalie we will. So he told her over the phone because once Sybil Hart knew that her ex-husband was aware of the truth she ran to Texas from Miami with the children. In fact the children had less then a weeks notice that they were moving. We only found out when Allison, the oldest child called her father crying that Mommy was moving them in two days. When David told the youngest child he was put in jail for contempt of court, but we got his conviction overturned. All the information can be found at http://florida.paternityfraud.com or through Carnell Smith’s web link.

 

As for Enrique no longer seeing the child that was not his he had no other choice if he did not want to be held legally responsible for her. Once he knew the truth he could no longer act as her father. If he did the law would be that he accepted the truth and continued to act as her father. He would never be able to be freed from the legal responsibility if he maintained a relationship.

 

Mia, the second wife was demonized unfairly. She and Enrique may want to have their own children, and yet the money would go to the children of his first marriage before the children of the second marriage would receive a fair and equal amount of parental support. The child support system creates and elite class of children and a secondary class, those of the 2nd marriage whose children are always the last to be considered. Isn’t it amazing that Mia and Enrique would be more responsible for a child that has no blood relation to either of them over their own blood children? Such is the mess that the child support system has created.

 

Dr.Phil, I have worked extensively with Carnell Smith and while he has been able to be liberated from the family court system, we have not.  My husband and I will be paying child support because of this fraud well into our retirement years. The Courts do not look upon the duped dad as a victim, the women is always the victim, even if she appears before the court with unclean hands.

 

As far as Gloria Allred and her famous cases, you conveniently forgot to mention that Amber Frey way a paternity fraud perpetrator. She lied about who fathered her child and victimized an innocent man. That alone should put her testimony in the murder case in question.

 

The way to solve this problem so that it no longer happens is to have a DNA test at birth, or at the very least, upon filing a divorce or child custody case. We no longer rely on English Common Law for most of our legal system. Why in the face of science do we not get rid of the law based upon the women being married to convey legality of the child? if DNA can get a man out of jail for rape or off death row why are men forced to pay child support when they are not the father?

 

If Gloria Allred wants women to be equal before the law and on the legal playing field, then why does she say that it is all right for women to profit through lies and deceit?

 

Maria’s new husband Chris should be careful. If Maria committed fraud once she will do it again. And if Maria is really concerned with the best interests of her child rather than lining her pockets with illegally gotten gain then she would make sure to find the child’s biological father and make him step up to the plate, as the saying goes. But Maria does not have her children’s best interests at heart, she is merely crying crocodile tears and playing the victim. She is the victimizer and she needs to be punished.

 

Nadine G.Mendelsohn-Ziskind

Florida Citiens Against Paternity Fraud

This is a bad situation. I feel bad for all parties. A lie is never good. What happens in darkness always comes to light; Enrique was deceived, but what is done is done. You have to move on! The only focus should be on Selina. She has to know that what has happened is not her fault. As parents we must instill in our children good morals and values.  She is still young and has a chance to live a life that is free from what her adult counterparts have portrayed. I am praying for you Selina and family. Blessings in Jesus name!

That woman (the mother who lied about her daughter's paternity) is the one who should be going before and court of law being charged with fraud.  WHY is it okay for her to have perpetrated this?  I am a woman and she makes me ashamed of being one.  This is clearly a case of fraud and the ex-husband should not have to pay one penny.  I feel sorry for the daughter -- not because of how she was treated by the man, but because she is related to such an evil woman.  That woman and the real sperm donor are the ones who should be financially responsible. 

 /first: I am confused by the attitude of the wife who instigated the DNA,.  I wonder about her Personal concerns. It seems to me she is completely out of place! Apparently he COULD have been the father or he would never have claimed the child as his.  However, to do what he did is unforgiveable. He must have felt love for this child so how he could do what he did is beyond my understanding.  I con't care whose fault it was in the beginning he is a sorry human being! His present wife had her own agenda! I had a hard time even looking at her on TV. She is a mean-spirited witch!

 

The young girl is beautiful! I hope her stepfather is able to adopt her.  Her mother leaves me cold too.  However, She loves her daughter in a way that the creep doesn't.

 

I am still very angry at the interloper wife sitting there acting like an innocent.

Earlier today,I watched the show about a father who paid child support for a number of years confronting the ex-wife about her affair and he not being the biologigal father. If there was any justice,a judge should order the ex-wife to pay back every single penny he paid in support. These days,the judicial system hasn't got the guts to take a stand against custodial parents that cheat the system. Also,Gloria Allread once again proved just how big a joke she really is. Every time she's on any talk show,she takes an 'anti-man" approach and basically makes a complete ass out of herself. She puts on a great show for the cameras and loses what little common sense she alleges she has. She's loud,rude,and thankfully not practicing law in Ohio,where she can screw over men involved in a messy divorce. She puts on a show ,saying she's all about the kids,when in reality,she's all about the almighty dollar. She's a disgrace to the legal profession and should be ashamed of herself,but we all know that her enormous ego would never allow her to be objactive. All we can do is pray that this idiot is never given a seat behind a bench of ANY court nationwide,or our judicial system will be in a deep serious world of hurt.

     While it is unfortunate that Selena is suffering as well as Enrique, the entire problem should be laid at the feet of the mother. I would love to see legislation that makes it a felony to commit paternity fraud and force the lying mother to return all monies garnered from the fraud, plus interest to the payer. Knowing that the "father" may in fact, not be the father in no way absolves the mother's culpability that started the chain of events that led to the problems the former husband and the children are forced to endure at the hands of a lying mother whose only aim was money, ostensibly for the child but which went to the mother.
What Gloria Allred is standing behind is the same as if a bank robber escaped being arrested for a number of years, he gets to keep the money without any other obligation at all, including being charged for bank robbery.