Topic : 12/25 Parent Trap

   AFter a divorce my exwife , got preg. with the guy who was involved with her while we were married.

However, The guy went about his marry way and left her holding the baby. I had already had 2 wonderful girls by my exwife too. I decided right away that even though the baby she was carrying was not mine and she would be brought into this world without a dad. I would try my best to fill that roll the very best I knew how.    I ended up adopting her, she is my daughter, there is no difference  between her and my other children. I love all my girls the same, See anybody can make a baby but it takes a man to raise one.

Also the girls have a very good mother, It was bad choices me and her mother made in our marriage. Thats not the childrens fault. I look at my last daughter as a gift from God, what joy she brings to us. She also has a step mother who loves her very much too.  I don't believe in divorce, alot of people get hurt through divorce LIKE KIDS.

KWP

Not that  I am a lawyer but after reviewing that particular statute it does not seem to be of any actual help anyways. They have a lot of counters against itself  in the satute as as whole and alot for you to do on your part as far as proof of burden. But the main point though as far as that goes is that how can a woman whom natually have a child be a factor. For they have the child and there is no questions of maternity of that. Now this only applies to natural births and c-sections. Now exceptions to this are concerns of baby switching. As far as artificial insemination it still boils down to the fact that the DNA is still the mothers without question and the big question here is the DNA of the male. I do not know the actual stand on invetro though to elaborate on that part. In all fairness this should be included into a statute whether it be this one or another if it already has not been covered somewhere. On the other hand though as far as being equal the mother is the one whom carries the child not the father or named paid child supporter which is usually the male let us face the truth here but some cases involving women wrongly paying child support as well (I have seen this personally). So the woman's maternity is not usually in question because of having the child naturally whereas it could be any sperm to have contributed to the DNA of the child.  I am not trying to imply anything bad or stereotyping of women at all. I am just refering to the cases of possible parental fraud where fidelity is the question. This may be one of the reasons why this statute was based. I do not know that for sure though. Try also looking at the laws/statutes of maternity if you can find them and parental rightsas well as your civil rights just in case you need to represent yourself. I personally think you are going to need to know all of them in your fight. And if your lawyer has not explained them to you yet try and get his explanation as well if at all possible of both sides of the coin objectively especially of the constitutional law and florida statute 742.18. Please read all of it you are going to need to know all of it for yourself. http://www.floridalegalanswers.com/statutes/index.htm is the webite for Florida statutes. I hope you win your case but the real problem with most things  especially concerning the fathers end ( but not limited to ) is how is it going to actually be treated.  As far as case law not much exists as far as your situation of where it has been with a positive outcome. What I have stated above for the woman carrying the child is weak at best though. You will need to combine that with a whole lot more unless something breaks your way.  You have got lots more studying and researching to do.

Now as for the show I too feel Enrique was wrong for the way he handled it with Selena. But on the other hand he was emotionally distraught due to the recent news. The feelings of betrayal of the father are very intense. I know all too well on that but never once walked out on our child and will not ever. In turn it is still no excuse to in fact take the action of just walking out on the child. Nothing excuses that in my opinion. Though he does have remorse for tht decision he made and wants to make ammends. As for him to be paying child support on a fraudulent bases I disagree on that.  As far as Maria goes all because you give birth does not make you a mother. Like much as is said about the relevancy of the sperm it takes more to be a father than just sperm donation. Well on the other side of the coin it takes more than just giving birth to be an actual mother in turn. A real mother does have the child's best interests in mind not one that is just using it a ruse for personal gain. And that is exactly what Maria is doing. Playing a very hurtful game not to just Enrique but mainly to Selena her own daughter. Knowing the whole time that he was not the father but would be the one to pay not the real bio father. Unknown if the bio father actually knows he has a child with her but he at some point in her life needs to be held responsible. But Maria due to her deceit still cheats him out of making that informed decision. Thus she is a playing a game with him too. Maria is a very selfish person and one thing that was not covered in the show why is it that Maria really did not have to answer for anything. In fact it was all diverted to Enrique and his wrong doings for the most part. Leaving him to constantly defend himself as that tactic is so widely used to keep someone that is trying to do the right thing in defense mode so the real actual issues never get resolved and the one causing the problem never has to be held accountable for their bad actions. Like in this case Maria. She has a lot of explaining to do to her own daughters Selena and her sister. It is obvious all she is about is getting the child support money otherwise she would of voluntarily of stopped it for Enrique and went after the real bio father. She also needs to pay Enrique back all the money he has paid her plus interest. And pay for counseling for her children now too. As for the legal aspect of this There definitily needs to be some changes in the legal system. Especially when it comes in regards to the way the treat one party unfairly. And let us facr facts here people usually the male (father in most cases though there are some women treated unfairly too and usually they are good mothers too. )  But it is quite a bit more towards the male end. Neither party should be treated unfairly not put orders upon them that are unfair. And I find it funny that when the courts keep the best interests of the child in that there is almost always child support attached unfairly. Is it in the best interest of the child to keep one of the parties in poverty for the sake it is in the best interest of the child. While this in fact creates resentment, feelings of unjusfulness, anger and frustration consistantly. Thus the courts themselves are in fact creating ill will by forcing one in this position while usually the liar profits. The fact is both parents need to be able to live not just the one. And both parties can have JOBS for both parties to support the child financially. And in so doing creating this ill will the liar that is profiting now feels empowered and hense feels untouchable and constantly creates problems for the party trying to do the right thing. The child sees this and thinks that lying to profit for yourself is okay and this in facts teaches the child to do this behavior and that it is acceptable. Now that is not too say this will happen in most cases but does create the breeding ground for it. And this is in the childs best interest HOW? In essence hurting the child's welfare. But anyway that is just my opinion to be fair and honest on both parts for the best emotional interest of the child. And if one or the other is not and it interferes with the well being of the child well then the person(s) causes this needs to suffer the consequences and not profit from it. Maria needs to makes ammends as well as Enrique. Enrique seems sincere about trying to make up for his really big behavioral mishap. In turn though there has been (from my point of view) some programming of Selena by the mother from the way she just talks about what the father did wrong and did not even approach about the mother. And quite obvious this lady (if you can call her that) loves to play these games because she has no consequence to pay by law and will use any means necessary to do it including programming her own daughter so she can keep gaining from it. Hopefully one day Selena will rebound and realize what he mother did was wrong then the real healing can begin if that is possible in this case. And what about the hurt this has cause the sister as well. After all she is a victim of this too. No real mother or father would do this to children at all. But all too often this happens. In conclusion though Maria should be able to be charged with felony fraud and have to pay restitution. She also demeans true womanhood. No true woman I know would do what she has. She is also denying other bio father family members either a grandchild, uncles and aunts as well as any cousins or possible other brothers and sisters a relationship. The real father needs to be founds and given information to make his own informed choice of what is going to do next. And last I fear the new husband with Maria as well. Sounds to me like he is about t be the next victim. Remember if he adopts Selena he then becomes legally responsible for the child. Not that it would be a bad thing for the sake as far as Selena concern but then that (if there is a divorce between them) means he will be paying child support to her. But it is a difficult position to be a stepfather to some one else's child too. Something else I know well. But I hope Selena gets two loving fathers out of all of this. Although the adoption would relieve Enrique of the financial end but he is against the adoption. Why perhaps? Could it be because he fears that he is going to lose any chance of a relationship with Selena if that happens. Which tells me he is not really thinking of the money. If he was he would of just immediately supported that notion.  And Hats off to Mia which is Enriques new wife. She is just looking out for her husband as a good wife does. She probably had an idea of what this would all mean before it was brought up. In her defense as well it was in fact that something that needed to be done. Although I think it could of been all been brought up in a much better way. But In Mia and Enriques defense they probably could not talk to Maria or even convince her to bring it up the right way because of her fear of losing the paycheck. And believe me that is all Maria is concerned about. So how could they bring it up the subject matter in an appropriate way involving the mother. So everyone here that is bashing Mia for her part needs to stepback and put yourself in her shoes with it..  

Many of the readers are making judgements without hearing the full story .  First, do we really know if the wife really knew?  They may have had sex with her within a short period therefore the wife wouldn't know. I do feel that when she became pregnant that she tell her husband,so he could make the  decision on  what he wanted to do.

I do feel strongly that HE should NOT have to pay child support.  The wife should have the bio dad.