Topic : 12/25 Parent Trap

I would just like to say to the people who just think that the unknowing biological father is just a pay check and not a victim as well. Your Wrong! Ten years ago I was told that I might be a father. I showed up at the hospital to see mom and baby to be told that I wasn't the father. Ten years later I'm asked to take a paternity test for this now 10 yr boy. Shocked, worried and upset because I thought this was settled 10 yrs. ago. I took the test because I thought that it was important for us both to know and for medical reasons and found out that I'm the father. I missed a lot of birthdays and holidays. Luckily we ended up in the same state so we have been spending time together getting to each other and he has a chance to meet his siblings and the rest of his other family.  This is a messed up thing that women do for selfish reasons. So please don't think that we're not victims as well. Thank you.

What were the two things that Dr. Phil said he never gets the child involved in?  Discussing adult issues with the child and I can't remember the other one. Anyone? Thank you

Also I think that it was criminal of that dad to stop the relationship with Selina that he had, just because he found out that he wasn't the biological dad. He was the only dad she knew and loved. Hopefully they can rekindle their relationship because every little girl needs their dad. Biological or not.

I can understand the frustration about the child support, but that should not stop him from loving her and taking care of her emotionally. Shame on Marie for doing that to both of them. She is to blame the most.

First....Maria is dead wrong for what she did to Enrique.  I think that 's obvious.  But MIa will have to someday face the consequences of her actions.  I, too, am a step mother to children whose biologiical mom did some very hurtful things.  I could have easily started a war with the ex and tried to control the situation.  But the ONLY true casualty of that war would have been the children.  Mia had an opportunity to  be a healer, a peaceamaker, a supportive  stepmother, a compassionate wife, a DECENT HUMAN BEING. 

But she is SO controlled by her hate for Maria that she has taken a "win at any cost" stance.  Enrique is obviously a man who does not make decisions for himself, and allowed Mia to lead him into this battle.

After  the show, Mia may feel like she "won" because so many were mad at Maria (myself included). 

But after the cameras stop rolling and the national glare is off of this situation, her manipulative and bitter approach to this family crisis will probably have severe consequences  - for MIA.  if she and Enrique survive this scandal intact, it will not be because she took the high road...it will simply be luck. 

Had I taken the same approach as Mia with my step children and the ex.......I could not have held my head up and looked myself in the mirror (or gone on national tv).  As many, many times as I wanted to "destroy" the ex....I was able to keep my mouth shut and my heart open....and my step children are happier and healthier because I put their needs before mine.  C'mon Mia.......GROW UP AND THINK OF SOMEONE BESIDES YOURSELF.  that little girl deserves better than this........

I feel that in places such as the US and Canada where we basically live in the land of opportunity, there should be no need for any mother to knowingly lie about her child's paternity, especially for reasons such as child support.  As a parent I could never imagine doing such harm to my child, long lasting and irreparable harm to a child by lying about such an important fact.  I saw this show and was angered that the lady lawyer could defend the fact that the man thought to be the father had to pay child support.  As a woman and single parent this was insulting since we are not getting to the root cause of the problem and we are only providing any easy solution for the mother. A mother has a responsible as an adult and parent to do right by her child and to shelter her emotionally, economically and otherwise. A mother must protect and represent the best interest of her children at all times.  If one needs money, then find a job. If one needs aid, then use welfare if required to move ahead in life not to live off of the system for the rest of your life. If one needs assistance, then educate yourself and seek the assistance that in a lot of cases are of little or no cost in our communities.  We must be an example to our children and as a single parent who has never had child support I found a way to educate myself, provide for my son’s needs and educate him in the process….and the thing is, we’re doing more than okay.

I watched this show twice!  I was so struck with anger when lawyer Gloria Allred stated that Maria simply made a mistake at the time she wrote Enrique down as the father but had absolutely NO forgiveness for Enrique's admitted mistake and regret for telling Selena in a devestating manner that he was not her biological father.  My anger was magnified when she stated the mothers mistake is not the crime, the real crime is the fathers who do not pay child support and force the mothers of their children to be on welfare!!!  OH!  I am so angry!  The REAL crime with regard to child support in this country is the LAW!!  It is so easily manipulated by angry, bitter money hungry ex wives!  That is the real crime.  My husband has never missed a visitation or child support payment until he lost his job of ten years.  He is an incredible father who would do anything for his son and would never have a DNA test (even though this has been a concern) because his son is HIS no matter what DNA says!  Gloria is right when she talks about the finger pointing not being helpful!  But she was finger wagging when she said it.  All of the grown ups need to get up over their own hurt feelings and decide if they really love Selena the way the say they do.  Because if they do, Mom should not care about support and Dad should not care about paying it!!!  UGH!!!  It frustrates me so much!  My ex husband and I have four children.  He is court ordered to pay much more than I am getting.  But it benefits my kids far more for him to see them than for him to be imprisoned and the kids visit him in jail!!  Plus if he were in jail...I get no financial support!  I would never put my children through the things that my current husband's ex is putting my step son through!  I would never put my ex or his wife through what we are going through.

It is a growing problem that women hold the upper hand in the court room!!!

I say all this as a mother, a women, an ex and a wife!!

I am still so ANGRY!!!

Never hold a child responsible for something he or she cannot control.

Never ask a child to deal with adult issues!