Topic : Defining Your Authentic Self

"My would took me to task and told me:'Do not rejoice at praise and do not despair at reproaches.'  

Before my soul gave me this advice I was doubtful about the value of my work.  

Now I understand that trees flower in the spring and bear fruit in the summer without seeking praise.  

And they let their leaves fall in the autumn and become bare in the winter without fearing blame."  

--Kahlil Gibran  

Well, my goal was to tackle this feeling/emotion that has been waylaying me for over a year now.  I finally was able to be in the right moment, at the right time, when it happened again and this time, I was able to hear what it's tapes were.  It took me 4 months to get to NOW. That's for goal closures -- that's pretty good!   

Now, that I've reached this point, it's time for me to see what's important in my life again.  What has moved up to where and why -- what am I thinking about doing -- that's actually part of my FINANCIAL FREEDOM goal.  I am determined to meet my CONQUER MINDLESS SPENDING goal by 10/1/05.  This feeling/emotion was stopping it because it was just a small piece of the big I'M DYING/GONNA DIE fear.    

So, I'm doing goal work once again ...  shouldn't take me long cause I review my goals monthly - but this time, it's going to be so different!   I'm adding another PRACTICE task to my growing list.  It's kinda nice - I feel like I have time & space now.  That i'm not running from 1 thing to another. 

I started to work on financial security on June 1 and from the moment I decided to tackle this fear in my life - I've found that I keep hearing myself say:  Boy this is just like losing weight. In fact, it's actually helping me to work thru my "fat" issues.  My financial goals have some emotional baggage but when I challenge them, I'm able to quickly move pass it. I'm really surprised to see how far I've come already. 

I'm using Suze Orman's books to help educate myself and because I do so much better when I can answer questions and have to do homework that I've been noticing some minor/small changes in my behaviors & thinking already.   

M 

The hardest lesson we should learn in life is not to take anything personally. Praise or blame is simply the vision of reality of the person who is speaking. Even if they address us personally with their statements it is not about us but their vision of us. What we feel about ourselves is the only reality of self that is. To many times we have taken a negative statement about ourselves and made it a personal truth. If someone told us that we were pretty, or fat, or ugly, or intelligent, or stupid we took it and made it our own because we bought into their reality, their vision of us.  

Guard your self respect and make sure that what is in there comes from you and your vision. That is the only way to truly respect yourself. 

Om Mani Padme Hum...LS 

Gary Zukav wrote a book called Soul Stories.  In it is a story that talks about the 8 winds.  Praise is one of those winds.  When praise takes us and knocks us off balance, we tend to do things to only seek praise.  When I learned to not seek it, to do things for how they made me feel, I became a much more balanced person.  Thanks for sharing this quote Longstory. 

Teri