Topic : Defining Your Authentic Self

Quote From: marcia52

Okay ... my latest mental conflict!!    It's been bugging me for a couple of weeks now ... it started when I walk the dogs and then come home and work in the yard .. BUT WHAT IF I don't work in the yard when I come after walking the dogs ...  what if I had to take a shower in the early morning and then go out, then come home and work in the yard .. but I CAN'T!!   That means 2 showers!!   maybe even 3!!!

 

Well, this morning, I finally asked myself:  WHY CAN'T I TAKE MORE THAN 1 SHOWER A DAY?  and I heard my mom's voice telling me that we can't afford the water bill!!

 

No kidding ...   so now, I'm going to take a shower this evening!  after I work in the yard.  I can't believe myself ... the big stuff is over and done with .. now it's the little things that are driving me nuts!  At least, I'm able to figure it out quicker now ...  because I can hear the conflict and see it in action!!

Quote From: nevine

No it's really difficult to talk to her, I have asked her why I couldnt go to meetings and her answer was that she thinks that ill meet the old people i used to use with and that ill go back to that, what she doesnt understand is that that place is a helping place to continue sobriety.  my mom is well educated so that's what i dont understand.  im doing my best in pleasing her but nothing seems to be good for her. 

Quote From: ritehere

 Marcia, do you have kids? I found myself asking the same questions of myself when I was raising mine. They would ask me why do I have to? and I would pause and have to ask myself that. Sometimes whatever it was I wanted them to do didn't make any sense, it was something I was told and I'd kept it as the "right" way to do things.
I used to have that same scruple about taking more than one shower a day. When I was grown up, I could see my parents' point, they had 7 kids and if we all started taking more than one shower a day, it makes a big difference in the water bill, not to mention the clean up afterwards. But for me on my own- it was OK to spend the whole day in the shower if that's what I wanted to do.

Quote From: taemanai

Humidity is difficult I think, but it seems to be more temperate and so people don't hide away indoors instead of doing things.  And are friendlier, I just want too much, sometimes, I think I'm doing people favours not depending too much on things, but my own perspective has changed so stressfully.  They say, when one gets over their past lets go, things are not as real, because a new reality has to be accepted.  That's how things are, like moving.

 

I used to be able to move as I wanted to but not really changed.  Now I stay still, and always working on my own mind etc.  So I'm prepared for changes and can better deal with them and have the knowledge, I know this is what I'm supposed to do but in no way achieves anything in the big, bad world.

 

I suppose you know all this, but it helps to keep at something, once one has begun.

 

All for now.

 

Belinda

Quote From: bryan9705

 it's hard to know  who you are when your family don't want you to be happy.i have been put down all my life.  and still people still put guilt trips on me .my sister next to me always finds a way to put a guilt trip on me.i want to move back to Tennessee and my sister don't want me to every since then one guilt trip after another.see said that my brother in law going have to take me to the bus station because she don't want to cry.maybe she don't but at lest she can say bye to us.it  feels like no one care about me sometimes  i feel like doing something stupid but my son keeps me from that. i wonder how my family would feel if i was gone from this earth  may one day but no time soon i hope i have to watch my son grow up even if my family don't like it . my sister is a user and a taker.

Quote From: ywkdi_2007

Oh god you so much sound like me. I also do things and then realise that, thats not me........ But guess its life and it just makes you live its way. I so wish sometimes that I can go back in time and undo some things but guess that wil not happen.........LOL, I wish it did. Well I think you are right, we must just face life as it comes. Thanks for your studies, I am gonna get back to my studies......... Cheers and take care............

Quote From: taemanai

Humidity is difficult I think, but it seems to be more temperate and so people don't hide away indoors instead of doing things.  And are friendlier, I just want too much, sometimes, I think I'm doing people favours not depending too much on things, but my own perspective has changed so stressfully.  They say, when one gets over their past lets go, things are not as real, because a new reality has to be accepted.  That's how things are, like moving.

 

I used to be able to move as I wanted to but not really changed.  Now I stay still, and always working on my own mind etc.  So I'm prepared for changes and can better deal with them and have the knowledge, I know this is what I'm supposed to do but in no way achieves anything in the big, bad world.

 

I suppose you know all this, but it helps to keep at something, once one has begun.

 

All for now.

 

Belinda

Quote From: ritehere

 I'm sorry your family is not supportive of you. However, letting them dictate your life and the way you live it shows a lack of control over yourself.  Your sister may well be a user and a taker, but it is YOU that allows her to take from and use YOU.
Are you not measuring up to her standards or your own? Do you owe her anything because you are living under her roof? Or is she living under your roof and taking advantage of you?