Topic : Defining Your Authentic Self

I tried to order the book from the web site, but couldn't complete the order. I am in Canada. Am I missing something or does Dr Phil not ship to us.

I can't find my authentic self, it's buried under the pile of debris I call life. I'm hoping get some assistance finding it here. I'm new to these message boards too. This is my first message so if I screw it up, sorry.

That's odd, I'm pretty sure they ship everywhere. I see that you posted this last night, I hope you have found your answer by now.

Start with the basics, what is it you want? Where do you want to go with your life? What exactly do you feel you have "lost"?

There are no stupid questions and you can't do it wrong, it's just life.

Try going to Amazon.Com for his books if you can't get it off his website. SOmetimes, his site just acts nutty.

You were quite clear .. you have acknowledged your life isn't working and it's a mess ... just like the rest of us have when we first came here.   And that you are looking for assistance .. you linked to a very good and kind soul ... Linda.   Linda will help you (aka Ritehere).   AND WELCOME!!!

I started to re-read Chapter 5 last night and a major AHA moment occurred.  My "sick" friend knows that she suffers from sinus problems which develop into colds unless she starts on benedryl and nyquil immediately. So instead of buying a body of nyquil to keep on hand, she waits for the next occurrence to suffer. Well, I feel SET UPON because she's not taking care of herself and I seem to be her "care giver" and it's a role I don't want.  ANyway, I got her nyquil yesterday and she called me.  And when I saw who it was calling I laughed and said, she's going to tell me this pathic "THANK YOU hee hee".  And I was right.

 

When I first the 1st section of the chapter, I realized that she's a phony and I know it.  That I'm not like her and I see her "sick-ness" as something she lives for. She has to have to 15+ meds, she has to lay in her bed and suffer.  And I want more from her .. I want a playmate, a confident .. and all I am is a care taker .. and only when she really needs me.

 

I also got a big AHA moment when I read the passage that "if you are sick, it will rub off on others" .. and I can see that.  I don't have sick people around me .. they wear me out .. having to do for them.  Yet, when I read that passage, I realized that my truly sick sick friends live with people who are just as sick as they are. That it's like they're feeding themselves illness.  Kinda weird AHA moment for me. 

I really thought it was a crazy ideal .. but the more I think about it, she's so much like my kitten Emily ... when she wants my attention, she takes her claws to the doorway or my kitchen table.  She gets thunked .. but she's doing it because she gets attention. 

 

And my mom does the same thing.  She knows what my buttons are and she's trying to get me back to her safety place.  DUH!!  Go figure!!  I'm making so many life pattern changes since picking up ANE that it's just like when I was living / breathing SELF MATTERS.  That handbook was my bible.  I just opened it up and did the ACTION PLAN with any and all pained memories and allows myself to step thru the pain.

 

Now, I'm working on PAIN-BODY -- emotions that I first named back in Sept 05 and can now honestly say .. that's where I need to work on again.  And pain hurts ...  good thing I know that when I work thru it, I'm going to be at such a nicer place.

 

And my mom and me, we're going to move into a very loving relationship!!  I'm reading ANE for her.  I want me to just ditch what hurts us both!  My behavior can change because I'm willing to make those changes.

I didn't know where to put this but am concerned about the Eckhart Tolle philosophy.

 

I wrote this on her message board and I continually am called 'negative' and 'hateful' for doing so.

 

"Over a month ago, when I first came here, there was a poster (not a Christian) who sounded like she may have a background in psychology and she was talking about the importance of the ego and why it is necessary. Strangely enough, everyone seemed to ignore it.

And the more I read here and view posts, the more I wonder if there may be more to this. I read posts of people slipping into unconciousness, insomnia, fear, depression, people are wondering if they are losing their minds, they are seeing things, crying spells, depression, confusion, tremors, hearing voices and even today, a woman on the brink of suicide. And 'seasoned' ETers just say "oh just keep going". Even to the suicidal woman???"

What is going on with this?

What's Tolle's background in psychology anyway and how do his bizarre teachings stack up to other psychologists and psychiatrists?

Everyone is on the search for happiness and contendness that you'll lose your common sense and rationality to jump on board with both eyes closed?"

There are people out there looking for answers to their problems, and maybe expecting to find them in this book when they should be talking with a counselor.

Eckart Tolle has some valuable information, but it can seem confusing to someone that is not familiar with the process of monitoring and examining their thoughts. I would venture a guess that the people that are experiencing negative emotions to the extent that it's interfering with their lives needs to speak with a trained counselor that can help them understand why they are experiencing this. Mr Tolle didn't cause their problems, his words merely brought them to the surface of consciousness.

Dr Phil's SELF MATTERS does a very good job of guiding you through the maze of hurtful memories and helping you to resolve your past so that it no longer affects your decisions and attitudes. I consider SM to be prerequisite reading to A NEW EARTH.

Have you read either book?