Topic : 07/04 Body Dysmorphia

He may well be right.  This world is more messed up than what I even thought was mentioned in the Bible and it has got it all!

 

You sound just educated enough to soon be dangerous!  (Jez kiddink....I hope you do someone some good some day. )

 

My point is that you don't know the answer either.  I said in an earlier post that Jesus said, "Come to me, all ye that are heavy-laden and I will give you rest."  Bottom line.

 

And I believe Him. 

 

Oh, BTW............alcoholism is  A CHOICE OF BEHAVIOR that then can lead to disease.  TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR 100% of YOUR LIFE!

 

At some point, one CHOOSES to go buy a bloody beer!

 

Stop the blame-game.  Because if one doesn't take responsibility FOR the behavior, one is then powerless to CHANGE the behavior.  Alcoholism  IS NOT "a disease".  Sheeeesh. 

 

NOW....before half the world jumps on me and tries to trounce me, it is fairly obvious that when a child LIVES IN AN ENVIRONMENT where someone is in the grips of the drink, of course, it affects them.  But at least in the early stages....it is a choice of behavior.  A choice of what to drink. One with alcoholics surrounding them might fall prey FASTER, and then of course, it TOXIFIES the body and wham....it takes over.  One drink and your mind is shot....gone....and then you no longer have power over taking another and another and another. 

 

So don't try to kick some preachers butt (America's new favorite past time) because believe me, THEY HAVE SEEN IT  A L L !  :o)

  I watched the show today in total disgust.  The first gal clearly has some problems that therapy might help but the 17 year old is an attention seeking little spoiled brat who just wants everyone to fawn over her and tell her on a daily, if not minute by minute, basis how gorgeous and wonderful she is.  Dr Phil was totally right, no one with true disorder like this goes up on stage and shows off her "hideous" face and body and then speaks out about it - get real little girl and stop looking for constant reassurance.  I watched her and it wasn't her appearance that made her ugly it was her attitude, attention seeking and poor little me garbage.  There are people out in the world with no arms, no legs, burn victims etc, that have a true right to feel this way about themselves.  I have horrible scarring by nature and guess what ?  I am almost 50 years old and I have one particular nasty scar across my upper chest from an old surgery and I wear what I want, when I want and I dont stand in front of the mirror whining poor me poor me.  I also didnt do that for more than a half hour when I went in for a lumpectomy and came out with a breast GONE !    I am right with Dr Phil when he said that some people would say "get OVER yourself"

Quote From: bernwink

Give me a break. Symptomatic of the self-absorbed superficial culture we live in. A product of too much time on your hands and trying to live like the articificial movie star and music idols. Want a sure cure? Go work as a volunteer in a rest home, VA hospital, or facility for severely disabled. See how sorry you feel for yourself then.   I do agree that America is obsessed with superficial things and movie stars.  But you obviously know nothing about this disorder.  It is a real disorder that many people suffer from and has nothing to do with having too much time or being self-absorbed.  Body dysmorphic disorder (BDD) is characterized by an excessive preoccupation with a real or imagined defect in your physical appearance. http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/body-dysmorphic-disorder/DS00559 I have not been diagnosed with BDD, but after learning about it in my psychology class, I realized that I may have this disorder.  My husband, family, and many people tell me I'm beautiful, and I will admit that in the past I have considered myself a somewhat attractive person.  But about 6 months ago, my skin has been breaking out really bad.  I've never had perfect skin, but now I'm even more obsessed with "hiding" my imperfections.  I avoid going many places and if I do, I have to wear makeup and have my hair down to cover my face.  Very few people have seen me without makeup, and those were rare instances.  As the definition states, it is "a preoccupation with a REAL or IMAGINED defect."   Now, on to your comment. "Want a sure cure? Go work as a volunteer in a rest home, VA hospital, or facility for severely disabled. See how sorry you feel for yourself then."  I'm sure the people that suffer from this disorder understand and realize that there are worse things going on in the world.  It is not about feeling sorry for yourself.  This condition can be caused by many things and a chemical imbalance in the brain is one of them.  You should do some research before you make those types of comments.  Like I said, I have not been diagnosed, but I would like to state a few things about myself that may change your mind about what you said.  I have volunteered in hospitals, soup kitchens, delivered food to the poor, and other volunteer work where I have seen many things.  I have also been to war and fought for our country.  So, since I have seen these things, does that mean I'm cured?  Again, it is not about feeling sorry for yourself and I hope you never have to experience the real feelings of BDD, but I hope you can try to understand how these people feel.

I am not going to write and essay. I am going to make this short and sweet if i possibly can contain myself.

I saw these narcississtic girls. They have nice straight, clean teeth. Mine are in poor condition despite whether i took fairly good care of them all my life. The dentists did what they could, when they could.  I doted in front of a mirror just like these ladies did but not to the extreme. 

Step away from the mirror girls, and go out in the community and help others besides your selfish selves girls. I don't have a pretty smile but i sure am happy to lend a hand to others when they need help. For the last 2 years I have a 10 year old girl that has no mom or dad stay at my house most all the time. She stays here so often it is as if she is my adopted daughter. I get no compensation for this. No money food or anything in kind for her staying here. 

 Sorry you are dead wrong, drinking is a choice, the fact that it takes the person into its grips and turns it into a full blown alcoholic disease is beyond our control.   You probably also think that someone being bipolar or majorly depressed has a choice huh ? 

Oh wait, let me come back to read your answer after I take my morning meds that have kept me functioning for 10 years so I can work and be a mother and grandmother.  I WISH that this was all a choice, cause I sure wouldnt have chosen any of this for my life.

And FYI - I am a college educated female holding a good job and have been sober since June of 2000 thank you very much.  The alcoholism and drug addiction is my cross to bear each and every day, but I chose to not drink or use, but I dont have the choice to get rid of the underlying disease, only whether to make it active or not. 

By your way of thinking all the people that chose to smoke also chose to get lung cancer ?  Sorry makes no sense.  They choose to smoke period NOT get a disease from it. 

I do agree that America is obsessed with superficial things and movie stars.  But you obviously know nothing about this disorder.  It is a real disorder that many people suffer from and has nothing to do with having too much time or being self-absorbed.  Body dysmorphic disorder (BDD) is characterized by an excessive preoccupation with a real or imagined defect in your physical appearance. http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/body-dysmorphic-disorder/DS00559 I have not been diagnosed with BDD, but after learning about it in my psychology class, I realized that I may have this disorder.  My husband, family, and many people tell me I'm beautiful, and I will admit that in the past I have considered myself a somewhat attractive person.  But about 6 months ago, my skin has been breaking out really bad.  I've never had perfect skin, but now I'm even more obsessed with "hiding" my imperfections.  I avoid going many places and if I do, I have to wear makeup and have my hair down to cover my face.  Very few people have seen me without makeup, and those were rare instances.  As the definition states, it is "a preoccupation with a REAL or IMAGINED defect."   Now, on to your comment. "Want a sure cure? Go work as a volunteer in a rest home, VA hospital, or facility for severely disabled. See how sorry you feel for yourself then."  I'm sure the people that suffer from this disorder understand and realize that there are worse things going on in the world.  It is not about feeling sorry for yourself.  This condition can be caused by many things and a chemical imbalance in the brain is one of them.  You should do some research before you make those types of comments.  Like I said, I have not been diagnosed, but I would like to state a few things about myself that may change your mind about what you said.  I have volunteered in hospitals, soup kitchens, delivered food to the poor, and other volunteer work where I have seen many things.  I have also been to war and fought for our country.  So, since I have seen these things, does that mean I'm cured?  Again, it is not about feeling sorry for yourself and I hope you never have to experience the real feelings of BDD, but I hope you can try to understand how these people feel.

 You are all so off the mark on this. BDD is not about vanity.
BDD is in the category of OCD's.  just as the anorexic looks in the mirror and sees fat, the person with BDD sees their reflection, and, in my case, sees a hideous freak.  I've had this disorder for many years and am now 57.  I have perfected the ability to almost never see my reflection.  I can fix my hair and put on makeup and not look at my face.  Consequently, if enough time passes that I don't see my face, I start to believe that I'm wrong, maybe I'm not a monster.  But then, I'll accidently see my reflection in a store window and am horrified.  I must immediately go home and pull the covers over my head while I berate myself for thinking I might be normal looking.  Not  beautiful mind you, just human looking.  BDD is also a very secret illness.  People don't often tell the people in their lives that they have it.  The few times I have, people simply couldn't grasp it.  It's just too strange.  One therapist I saw about it, suggested I use a drug  given to schzophrenics to control hallucinations.  I have no idea why my brain works this way.  But I can assure you it's not about beauty and ego.  It goes far beyond that.
Just because you don't experience it, and can't imagine experiencing it , doesn't invalidate it.  Have compassion.  Someone you know and love might be suffering in silence.

I just can't understand this "illness".  I'm thinking that this may be a bonified "western" version of OCD but, honestly, all I can say is this - we CREATE THIS MONSTER by our cultural obsessions with looks and someone's (who, by the way) ideas of what  "BEAUTIFUL" is anyway.  Either get the correct medicine or be BDD and live anyway....

 

Maybe i'm wrong, but when I am made aware of the people who are struggling to survive war and dying and finding food and shelter, sustanence - etc., I'm sure that we would put aside thoughts of a mirror image..... perhaps we just have it so good that we just have the time to obsess about these types of things.  I mean, if you HAD TO SURVIVE - a person would put on a mask to cover the perceived ugliness (these girls were, frankly, beautiful....by stereotypical standards.) and get their daily business done... especially if their lives were at stake.  In other words, be "ugly" and go about your business anyway.  Honestly......

 

I saw a documentary about people starving in Ethopia in 2004 - no food but grass in 21 days. I hazard to believe that anyone of us would put aside obsessions like these if our lifes were in dire jeopardy.....

 

We worry about these things because we can.  My heart goes out to these enabling parents.  WHAT DO YOU DO, anyway?  I have no idea how I would resolve my mind around this as a parent.

 

  I'm an obese individual and I have to watch ET tonite ridicule obese people by putting models in fat suits and telling the world how everyone laughs about them while they waddle around in their fake suits until they cry and beg to have the fat suits taken off.  I mean.... what is the purpose of this exercise?  Pity? Understanding?  I don't get it.

 

I mean, HUH?  This is my life..... I'm a size 22 - according to these suited beauties - UGLY!!!!!  Well, I can't just fold up and live in my house behind curtins.  I have to SURVIVE.... WORK..... PAY BILLS.... WORK HARD AT MY DIET..... REINFORCE MY BRAIN WITH GOOD T HOUGHTS.... EXIST IN A WESTERN WORLD THAT GLORIFIES SMALL BLONDS WITH LITHE BODIES.... OH WELL!!!!

 

I don't have any answers but I live, pay my bills and make my way independently every day anyway.

 

There in place no matter what.....

 

 

 

I really do feel for you but you need to forget yourself and get a life.  Your description is all about you and your "issues".  Trust me - truthful comment based on your words above - people avoid you because I strongly believe that when you come into contact with someone - it becomes all about you. ... including your husband.

 

I mean - do you get subsidized or something?  Don't you have to make your own way in the world?  "Ugly (whatever that is) "people are everywhere and mingling in society.  Who has time to contemplate this anyway?  If you truly believe you are one of them... who cares?  Mix in .... no one notices, anyway, and you may just establish a life that has some meaning besides what is going on with your looks..wear a mask. laugh anyway ... be ugly .... believe it's all in YOUR MIND anyway.... who cares.  You are a good person.

 

Well meaning. You clearly have too much time to think and not enough making a living stress in your life.