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Topic : 03/19 A Model's Dangerous Marriage

Number of Replies: 322
New Messages This Week: 0
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Created on : Friday, October 26, 2007, 02:55:30 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original Air Date: 10/31/07) It was the picture–perfect wedding -- a model marrying the handsome man she says treated her like gold. But after a few years of marriage, Kevin and Heather are in a dangerous relationship. They constantly yell, scream and fight, and their home life has gotten so bad that Heather says Kevin has picked her up by the throat, thrown her to the ground, held her at knifepoint and even taught their 3-year-old daughter to call her the C-word. You won't believe where their daughter ends up during the chaos! Kevin says Heather is the one who gets in his face, and she needs to stop being so controlling. He claims he's a changed man, but should she trust his behavior now? The Dr. Phil show installed cameras in their home. Why does Dr. Phil say the footage caught on tape is frightening? And, their moms weigh in on the situation. Should Heather spend another night under the same roof as Kevin? Her uncle offers her a safe place to rest, but will she take him up on the offer, or return home with the man she says could kill her or her daughter? Join the discussion.


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October 31, 2007, 8:31 am CDT

Wow

This is so my relationship, except my husband constantly nags me, follows me all through the house, has broken down doors because, i just want him to stop. He will complain about "whatever" then he starts to chime in on me, I guess because I have heard it too many times before. Then when he starts to either call me names or put me down, i go upstairs in our playroom or in our bedroom to get away from it, but "hes not done, getting it off his chest, then I am a whore, slut, you name it. If I try to leave the room he will block it, if I yell at him, I have actually hit myself in the head a few times  just because he keeps on and on and on. I can handle it. If I brush up against him getting out of the room, yes he has hit me. What the Hell , do i deserve this????He just called on the phone, told him we need help , told him what was on today on the show, first, his is not a real big fan of the show, i guess because of stuff like this, told him i want to get help, he says we both need to go, did this before, twice and he cancelled, told him if we do it this time and he cancells, were done. But of course, he thinks alot of it is me, he sells pitches me into thinking its all me. Told him that the psychiartrist will see if he has some mental disabilities. I also told him, to not cancell out even if he doesnt like what they are saying about our relationship, but he will only go if its to save our marriage? is it savable?
 
October 31, 2007, 8:35 am CDT

10/31 A Model's Dangerous Marriage

Quote From: scorpio21

      She should move if she fears for the life of her child and herself.  She probably says "But I love him!!!"  Love won't keep her alive if you fear the one you "love".

Being in a mentally and verbally abusive relationship myself 

I can say that it's not always easy to get up and leave

in my situation, I have three kids , no job and no family of my own

other than my 3 kids (4,6,8)

I have talked to a lawyer but I can't afford to pay for a divorce and I believe

I can't do it on my own because he'll fight me on everything

so although before I was in this situation I felt like you should just get out it isn't

always so cut and dry 

 
October 31, 2007, 8:51 am CDT

10/31 A Model's Dangerous Marriage

Quote From: casee699

Being in a mentally and verbally abusive relationship myself 

I can say that it's not always easy to get up and leave

in my situation, I have three kids , no job and no family of my own

other than my 3 kids (4,6,8)

I have talked to a lawyer but I can't afford to pay for a divorce and I believe

I can't do it on my own because he'll fight me on everything

so although before I was in this situation I felt like you should just get out it isn't

always so cut and dry 

He's got you right where he wants you  - - believing that you can't make it without him.  Get the phone book out  and look for help.  There should be a legal aid serivce in your area to help with legal fees and you can get a job.  Two of your kids should be in school and since your income is non-existent youshould be able to get child care based on that.  Don't make excuses!  Go to a shelter.  Believe in yourself.  Stop being a victim.  Go to a shelter, they will help you put your life back together in a way you can manage.

 

WE CAN ALL MAKE IT!

 
October 31, 2007, 8:52 am CDT

Domestic Violence

Quote From: sharperk

Get out, get out, get out, I was once a victim of a 'one time' physical explosion after a 10 year marriage; by  the Grace of God I live today! that is the only explanation I can allow! I was so hurt, I can barely walk from all the damage done to me! a one time attack!! I hope that woman wakes up, my belief is people don't hurt the ones they love period! My parents raised all of us to beieve that, somehow I married someone who controlled his rage for the 10 year, except as I look back I am able to see signs I ignored, but when he snapped in his black rage, he nearly killed me! Please get out, once they have hit you, you are always thinking and so are they that they can beat you again! At least my parents brought me up that way, Iost my parents already and loved them to the fullest and have no regrets in their lives, except the fact that they are gone! They did a wonderful job of bringing up us kids! To the lady & your daughter, get out and get help, and all the abusive monstors should be arrested and placed into a cage/jail; that is where anything that is attacking you belongs!
Worried about me no. Other women being abused yes, I as one of them.I don't want to be on your show for my own personal reasons. A man I had been living with for 3 months and not because I wanted tobe...Anyways he had said to me when you get your check I want tou out of my apartment. I said no problem ,I had planned on that doing just that. I turned around walking down the hallway he came from behind me and the next thing I knew I was being thrown around like a rag doll. I seen stars , at one time I thought I was dead....Anyways  I could not move, He took my car, my cell, my purse and took off, came back and begged him to please take me to the ER ...Which he had  threated me made his phones and said if she says anything and I go to jail you knoow what to do...The dr. never took anyways sent me home with pain meds which he took away me......At this I was A cashier for ..............I don't want to give that info. out and I was also a diarey clerk. I was off for about a week, I was afraid to go the police at that..well guess what? This happened on July 1999-I was in so much pain I couldb't even lift a gallon of milk it would just fall out of my hands by this time I was in so much I went a private Dr. I told him everything b y this time is was October 99, he took just an regular exray of my neck ..What the xray had was my neck was broke , one of the bones was just liying on my spinal cord.....I have all of my x-rays from the time i was that my neck was.....;I had to be fused c3,4,&5......At this time the only thinf here the judge would give was a 6 month restraining order...he had all of my medical records x-rays, the judge new he was a habitual criminal....Well now I am fused 2c to 7c yes second surgery i just had in 2006......The surgery my screws broke and from there on my neck kept getting worse and worse, ..I have a tituiam plate with screws and a cage around my spinal cord.......And this monster his still running around here in this city....He has spread the word if he ever runs into he will make sure he kills me next......I thank the lord above was watching over......no that wasn't the first physical abuse....Once a man abuses he will always abuse.....This man has abused other women....I had one witness but she would testify because she was married and if her hubsand found out that they were even speaking to each other he would divorce her.......SO I URGE DESPERATELY ANYONE CHILD OR WOMEN THAT IS OR HAS BEEN BATTERED PLEASE GET OUT RIGHT AWAY BECAUSE IT WILL NOT STOP..............
 
October 31, 2007, 9:45 am CDT

10/31 A Model's Dangerous Marriage

Quote From: iamvip

I must admit I am having a hard time feeling sorry for Heather.  She seems like an immature attention  seeker who is addicted to attention in whatever form she can get it.

 

What's so hard about leaving?  The man keeps trying to get away from her all the time.  She knows he is capable of slapping her around, yet she continues to wlak directly into those fist again and again.  If he says leave him alone -  THEN LEAVE HIM ALONE!  What's so hard about that.  MOVE.  Get A restraining order.  Get a gun!

 

Guess what Heather, you are raising a daughter that will up expeecting to get the **** beat out of her all the time too!  Think of who the REAL victim is - your daughter.

 

What are they both there for?  There is no love between them and clearly he feels like she ruined his life by having the baby ( I guess he feels he had no part in the pregnancy!).

 

If you need a thrill, go ride a roller coaster, don't destroy your daughter's life.  Where are the grandparents?  somebody needs to take that baby!!!

I agree. I think she came on there wanting to portray the total victim. It's obvious there's no love between him, so why waste the time, and life?..He's a brute, but I really think she's a game player too..Real love shouldn't be so painful and angry..Real love, when you finally find it, is easy. It's that simple..
 
October 31, 2007, 9:51 am CDT

Well wishes

To every woman on this board who has been or is in a violent relationship, I wish you the very best. I've worked as a victim advocate and counseled more women in domestic violence situations than I can count. Some leave, some stay, and it is not anyone else's right to tell them what they should do. Leaving is what everyone WANTS a woman to do, but until you've walked a mile in their shoes, you can't even begin to know what they go through. Wishing all women in these types of situations the very best, in all that they do.
 
October 31, 2007, 12:32 pm CDT

No Excuses

Even if this woman doesn't have the love and respect of self to leave this evil situation she should put her child out of harms way. If she foolishly choses not to than I strongly believe the  law must be brought into this situation. That baby did not chose this and even her own mother does NOT have the right to put her life in danger because of poor choises she makes for her own life.  Kim in Kansas
 
October 31, 2007, 12:38 pm CDT

Get Out Before You are Dead!

This show... oh my gosh!  First, this guy is an abuser and is going to kill this woman.  They both have their own junk in this relationship.  Get the child out of that environment!  Teaching the child to call her own mother the "C" word... and he is supposed to be a Christian!  I am a Christian and this guy gives us all a bad name!  He needs serious anger management therapy. My heart goes out to the little girl.  She has two messed up parents and is caught in the middle.  This man is going to explode and kill someone!  Get out now! 

 
October 31, 2007, 12:42 pm CDT

Heather, it's past time to leave...

I'll be brief, Heather. I've been exactly where you are, and you
deserve better. While I must say you are not innocent, this
is not a good envrionment for you or for your daughter.

Yes, it is hard, yes it will take some time, but years from now
you will thank yourself for taking back that part of your life.
Life has a way of passing by rather quickly.

Kevin is not going to change, but even if he did, it would
be too little too late. Your spirit has obviously been affected
and you will never get it back.

Heather, think about it. You are indeed a beautiful young lady.
Kevin did not marry you for who you are, but what you portray.
What you do for his ego. This is not meant to hurt you.
There is no substance to the relationship.

Your daughter cannot be the glue that holds the marriage together,
because we saw today that your daughter does not have, nor should
she have, the power to keep the two of you together.

Get rid of him and focus on your daughter, you don't want
her to grow up repeating your choices. Help to show her
a woman does not have to stay in such a violent and hate-filled
relationship.

Best of luck to you!



 
October 31, 2007, 12:43 pm CDT

Get that daughter out!!!

I don't care what happens to the mother/father.  He's evil, and she's immature/manipulative.  That daughter needs to be taken away ASAP by CPS.  I certainly hope that Dr. Phil does that. 
 
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