Topic : 03/19 A Model's Dangerous Marriage
(Original Air Date: 10/31/07) It was the picture–perfect wedding -- a model marrying the handsome man she says treated her like gold. But after a few years of marriage, Kevin and Heather are in a dangerous relationship. They constantly yell, scream and fight, and their home life has gotten so bad that Heather says Kevin has picked her up by the throat, thrown her to the ground, held her at knifepoint and even taught their 3-year-old daughter to call her the C-word. You won't believe where their daughter ends up during the chaos! Kevin says Heather is the one who gets in his face, and she needs to stop being so controlling. He claims he's a changed man, but should she trust his behavior now? The Dr. Phil show installed cameras in their home. Why does Dr. Phil say the footage caught on tape is frightening? And, their moms weigh in on the situation. Should Heather spend another night under the same roof as Kevin? Her uncle offers her a safe place to rest, but will she take him up on the offer, or return home with the man she says could kill her or her daughter? Join the discussion.
Find out what happened on the show.
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March 21, 2008, 11:18 am PDT
 This was some show. They both need extensive counseling and the child needs a loving safe enviroment until they can get things together. If the mother has been abused, raped and on the streets she's not okay and in no way should be raising a child. She doesn't seem to have had any couseling for what she went through. Kevin too needs much help. They need to own up to their part and do what is best for the child who in 10 years will wind up like her mother. Has either of them thought about what they would do if their daughter was in a marriage like there's? Would Dad stand for his little girl being treated like that? That's exactly what he's teaching her and mom isn't helping any. CPS should have stepped in a long time ago. |
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March 21, 2008, 12:18 pm PDT
Quote From: maleabused Dr. Phil I am a 30 something male who was also in a relationship with a younger woman ( 8 yrs) and would like to express my sympathy for the man who is definetly feeling the age difference in the relationship. I was also brought up to not hit girls, not to hit in anger no matter WHAT. My mother is a spousal abuse cousellor and also a verteran of the cause. I grew up knowing, living, breathing that violence within an intimate relationship is NEVER an acceptable action. Further as a student nurse it is now mandatory to enquire, of women, if abusive types of acts are occuring in their relationship.
My point is this - MEN CAN BE ABUSED - old school men used to growl and they would be allowed their space, the guy on the show, myself, all big men used to use this as an effective tool to get their space. These days however the women in the relationship similar to that women on the show - though pretty - WAS A PSCYCHO- troubled history and a junkie for negative attention, or the women who doesn't feel alive unless they have a burden, a cause that they have to throw all their emotional energy into -- MAINLY AN EXCUSE any excuse all excuses. And like the mowen from the show will not give an opinion until forced but is usually qualified based on some other plausible OUT. AAAAAAGGGHHGHGHGHGHG
I identify with the man on the show, kinda large, but I have never struck my spouse out of anger, rage, or spite. I have said every nasty thing under the sun, never toward my daughter, but i have also tried to teach my daughter to say bitch. I have used the C word, the list can go on and on. I have had to leave the house many times to calm a situation down and the police have been called to the house. I feel why this man was frustrated and agree that the amount of love he may have for his family will ultimately be destroyed by a woman who does not know how to trust or be loved.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why don't you do a show with the female as the abuser, your point of view that the man should be bloodied and bruised and half dead before they can consider never touching a woman. THIS IS WRONG, what you do is give women, and daughters a free pass to hurt men in society with these comments and this issue is already something i will liken to being gay in the 50's - 60's. I understand that your old-school upbringing and the TEXAS influence probably doesn't allow you to listen too to many whining men but I would like to say. HOW many women have hit their spouses out of anger and gotten away with it.!!!!!!!!!!
This for me is a very touchy issue because what is good for the goose is good for the gander and I am nothing if not fair. I have witnessed spousal abuse from all sides and the issue is very near and dear to me. HELP SOME OF YOUR MALE WATCHERS by doing a show about female abusers, the excuses, the lies, the lack of trust, love and committment and what men can do to help their women change, or at least to see, understand and learn from their partners who are older.
Either that or do a show on the women who have children with men because their lives are hollow and empty and don't want to be lonely again. I would really like to see the show, get some advice, something.
Thanks for listening.
Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is a psychological disorder characterized by pervasive instability in self-image, behavior, moods, and interpersonal relationships. This instability often disrupts family and work life, long-term planning, and the individual's sense of self-identity.
While less known than schizophrenia or bipolar disorder (manic-depressive illness), BPD is more common, affecting 2% of adults (1-33), mostly females. Some of my favorite books that provide a great introduction and insight are:
MAYBE The Professional Bachelors Dating Guide: How to Exploit Her Inner Psycho by Dr Brett Tate
The Psychology of Female Violence: Crimes Against the Body by Anna Motz MAYBE A Child Called It: One Child's Courage to Survive by David Pelzer MAYBE Whatever Mother Says by Wensley Clarkson
Why is it Always About You? The Seven Deadly Sins of Narcissism by Sandy Hotchkiss AND Emotional Blackmail: When the People in Your Life Use Fear, Obligation and Guilt to Manipulate You by Susan Forward
Get Me Out of Here: My Recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder by Rachel Reiland OR Girl Interrupted by Susanna Kaysen OR Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back...by Paul Mason and Randi Kreger
Understanding the Borderline (Parent) Mother: Helping Her Children Transcend the Intense, Unpredictable and Volatile Relationship by Christine Ann Lawson OR Surviving a Borderline Parent: How to Heal Your Childhood Wounds & Build Trust, Boundaries and Self-Esteem by Kimberlee Roth and Freda Friedman OR The Angry Heart: Overcoming Borderline and Addictive Disorders by Joseph Santoro and Ronald Cohen
Divorce Poison: Protecting the Parent-Child Bond from a Vindictive (Relative) Ex by Richard Warshak OR High Conflict People in Legal Disputes by Bill Eddy
Some of the story is typical: feelings of insecurity contributing to destructive behaviors such as promiscuity, manipulations, self-abuse, rage attacks, revenge, addictions, and eating disorders. The extreme behaviors of BPD constitute the high drama in the stories of those who endure its ravages.
Hope it helps!
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March 21, 2008, 12:30 pm PDT
I only watched part of this show as it began to upset me. The one who suffers the most in this situation is the child. Both the mom and dad need serious help in dealing with their anger and abusive behaviour and neither of them deserve to have that child in their custody. That twat of a father was teaching his three year old daughter how to say, use and spell the c-word. When I heard that i was disgusted and appalled and believe he needs a "hypothetical" slap in the face to wake him up. No daddy would do that to their child. The mom is no better - if she is going to argue or whateve with her husband then do it without the kid in her arms! I agree that couples fight - but fight fair and neither side of this equation should hit. Men are taught not to hit women, but what about women? Why is it so one sided? Some women can pack a punch and injure or hurt a guy... First and for most the kid should be taken away (temporarily) and the parents should be in counselling ,to deal with all their issues. She is no angel either - i do believe she provokes him. He would try to walk away and she'd follow him and keep running her mouth off. My thoughs on this matter. |
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March 21, 2008, 12:46 pm PDT
Kevin seems to be a woman hater. He has so much hate for his wife Heather that it's oozing out of every pore he has. I don't believe his precious daughter will ever be the apple of her daddy's eye because he's only looking at her as a way to torture his wife. Another fear I have he will abuse his daughter because "she reminds him of her mother", the very woman he detests. I pray and beg, PLEASE!! PLEASE!! make sure he has supervised visits for a very long time. Surprisingly, I was hoping he wasn't her father because I sense with every fiber of my being that he so hate his wife that he will make sure his daughter pay for her mother's sins, whatever they may be in his sick mind. I don't think he can be fixed. I believe Heather has a lot of issues herself to deal with and she needs many years of therapy. It was sicken to hear Kevin use the horror Heather lived through as a young girl to belittle her like it was her fault. And to threaten to do that to his own daughter, DESPICABLE! I believe if it wasn't for her daughter she would have collapsed during this marriage a long time ago but she knew she was the only saving grace her daughter had. Don't misunderstand tho, I agree that she shouldn't hold her daughter when all this confrontation took place. With extensive therapy I believe she'll make it. As for Kevin, I fear if he don't have supervised visits with his daughter, he will use her to lure his wife to his location and killed them both or it'll be a murder-suicide. He's so arrogant and delirious that even after death he will think he won. |
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March 21, 2008, 6:38 pm PDT
Quote From: Pleasance Highly disappointed with Dr. Phil's handling and the presentation of this show. This couple is not having marital difficulties. There is a distinct pattern of willful and intentional tactics and antics on the part of the Abuser husband.
There is no excuse for Domestic Violence.
Most especially the message sent to the audience and the millions watching at home was mentioned that when there are fatalities in a relationship where there is Abuse and Violence that it occurs in an accidental fashion. NOT SO.
The characterization of these fatalities as accidental, or something that gets "out of hand" or possibly impulsive is inaccurate, false, and not in keeping with what the studies, statistics, and situations bare out.
These acts are most generally, often preceded by a history of intimate violence that is anything but accidental or impulsive.
These are crimes of POWER AND CONTROL, CONTROL OVER ANOTHER INDIVIDUAL WHO IS TARGETED BY THE ABUSER....TO DOMINATE, CONTROL AND OWN POWER OVER.
There are long standing conflicts in the MIND OF THE ABUSER. OFTEN IS RELATED TO THE END OF A RELATIONSHIP, with the woman finally seeing the light and ending the sham of a relationship or marriage.
Was no one listening to this woman say " he will kill me, if I leave?" "He will prostitute my child" Many of these Violent Abusers, maim, destroy or kill 'their property, they see the woman and children, even pets as their property. Abusers don't relate to people. Their sense of entitlement doesn't allow for that.
'You are NOT going anywhere' And frankly, neither is he, many, many Abusers use the ol' ploy...that they will leave, or they are leaving to further abuse and play head-games with their woman or the children.
SHE MOST DEFINITELY WAS IN DANGER AND STILL COULD BE. As well as the CHILD.
More than 1,200 women are killed by their intimate partners annually in the United States, and close to 30 percent of those murders are followed by suicides.
Using the examples of.....
OJ Simpson
Scott Peterson,
Mark Hacking
Premeditation comes to my mind.
To describe these heinous acts, choices on the part of the Abuser as impulsive or in some cases accidents..... diminishes the deliberate actions in committing these crimes. And truly negates the suffering of women in family Violence households.
Are we suggesting that the perpetrators were unable to control their impulses?
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, ABUSE IS ABOUT THE ABUSERS NEED TO CONTROL AND IT IS INTENTIONAL...A CHOICE DELIBERATE ON THE PART OF THE ABUSER.
While I understand the theory behind handling this particular Abuser in the fashion Dr. Phil chose, I believe I understand.
However.........Dr. Phil what about all the other messages that are getting out there to your audience, and the masses of folks watching at home and around the world.....when will we see shows that will contribute with real answers, true ownness, debunk the myths, and really give folks the understanding that is sorely needed in our societies to help stamp out this horrid Abuse, & Violence against Women and Children....in their own homes.
Domestic Abuse and Domestic Violence is a strong reality of everyday life for millions of women and children in our country and around world.
People need to be educated, really educated on the cycle of Violence, the tactics, the manipulations, the POWER AND CONTROL.
One person can completely destroy an entire family.
It's happening everyday.
It's happening now, as I type.
Please Dr. Phil.....more education.
The absolute REAL INFORMATION.
People still don't "get it."
IS DOMESTIC ABUSE, AND DOMESTIC VIOLENCE THE ONLY CRIME LEFT WHERE WE ARE STILL BLAMING THE VICTIMS?
Why is that so? !!!
Couldn't have said it better myself. You bring up some very important issues. It's a different world when you're in that situation. People that have never experienced it don't truely understand the damage it causes. It takes incredible strenght and courage to leave an abusive relationship.
Dr Phil should be giving the tools needed for someone in those situations to be able to leave. Not blame them and not applaud the abuser. Which is exactly what happened on that episode.
Hopefully someone is watching over the model, because after getting applauded when Dr. Phil would say that SHE would nag and push him, I'm affraid of what he'll be capable of doing to her NOW.
You bring up a good question about how people are still blaming the victime.
Hope Dr. Phil gets an earful on this subject so he can maybe answer that question. |
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March 25, 2008, 2:40 pm PDT
Quote From: anirom This was some show. They both need extensive counseling and the child needs a loving safe enviroment until they can get things together. If the mother has been abused, raped and on the streets she's not okay and in no way should be raising a child. She doesn't seem to have had any couseling for what she went through. Kevin too needs much help. They need to own up to their part and do what is best for the child who in 10 years will wind up like her mother. Has either of them thought about what they would do if their daughter was in a marriage like there's? Would Dad stand for his little girl being treated like that? That's exactly what he's teaching her and mom isn't helping any. CPS should have stepped in a long time ago. I know lots of women, including myself, who have been raped and abused as children and with #1 God & a belief/dedication/true abiding in Jesus have grown into beautiful merciful adults, loving parents, and excellent teachers. All of which I have been through and I probably make a better parent and teacher because of it.
Joyce Meyers was raped all her life by her father, she is amazing evangelist and a proud parent of, I think, 5 grown children who love her. Paula White was raped and, I think, prostituted out by her father who ended up committing suicide. Another amazing woman. Heather was raped and chose not to have an abortion because of her Christian beliefs.
Dr. Phil, who I would assume you respect, came from an alcoholic family.
Kevin has been through worse physical and emotional abuse than Heather and he also experienced sexual abuse too. The difference is that he did not seek the help and healing necessary for healing. Kevin turned to drugs, alcohol, abusing his wife, angry music, and lying/pride. Kevin hid who he was and his family hid who they were and this deception can happen to ANYONE. Lest we boast that we are "above" that and then we fall due to our pride. Those who have not been conned, count yourself lucky and blessed. Lots of intelligent, amazing, even God-fearing & believing women and men have made mistakes in selecting their marriage mate. Some could be prevented and some could not.
People CAN AND DO change when they get married, get pregnant, get fearful, have adultery, get saved or decide to out and out live for the devil, get addicted to alcohol or drugs, experience the death of their child, etc. As humans, we cannot predict our future or our mates future, we cannot predict what will happen, we simply must trust God if we have faith that nothing will be more than we can handle and we must trust God with the "whys" and the "when will we be delivered."
Their child is one of the smartest, more amazing children out there. Heather is teaching her morals, three languages - English, German, and Spanish (which for awhile Kevin thought was stupid!), math, etc.. the child knows the bible because of Heather's dedication and she reads on a 1st grade level. Heather was a well respected educator in Florida for many years before her marriage as well as working for the government to put together finances that had been destroyed by unethical people. It is not Heather or the child's fault that Kevin was trying to teach her evil worldly carnal things and that is precisely what Heather and Kevin fight over. Heather protected her daughter and did not give up where many other mothers or fathers would have, Heather gave up her careers, education, and her own happiness to make sure her daughter was not alone with Kevin or his parents who think cartoon porn is okay for children to see.
CPS could not provide a better environment. Prior to marrying Kevin, Heather was going to become the mother of 3 little girls in the foster care system and she went through all the training and extensive evaluation to do it. So CPS approved of Heather so did the public schools.
The truth needs to be told. God promises that those who curse true Christians or prophets of the Lord will have the curse turned around on themselves. God requires those who represent the Christian faith publicly to adhere to his statutes and commandments or they their pride will cause a fall. God expects Christians to tell the truth, to represent and help the oppressed, and to be facilitators of justice.
Amos 2:6b - 7
"... I will not reverse the punishment of it or revoke My word concerning it, because they have sold the [strictly] just and uncompromisingly righteous for silver (or money or financial gain) and the needy for a paid or sandals;
They pant after [the sight of] the poor [reduced to such misery that they will be throwing] dust of the earth on their heads [in token of their grief]; they defraud and turn aside the humble [who are too meek to defend themselves]; and a man and his father will have sexual relations with the same maiden, so that My holy name is profaned."
Was Heather sold out for a very expensive pair of shoes? Was the truth spoken? Heather chose not to cuss at Kevin nor hit him. Heather does not believe that it is right for a woman to hit a man either. When Heather was raped she made a decision to forgive the man raping her and not gouge out his eyes and make him blind because she understood that he was overtaken by evil and did not understand (on a moral or spiritual level) what he was doing and that the rapist was repeating the abuse done to him to her and that it was about control.
Jesus - God's son, Stephan, Paul, Peter, Joan of Arc, and many others before were great prophets of the Lord and also very persecuted people. They did not do anything wrong to deserve being beaten and stoned. They spoke THE TRUTH and for THE TRUTH (and what is RIGHT) they were persecuted.
What makes these people different from everybody else? These are the people who are willing to die for what is right and moral. These are the people who make a difference and change the world. These people care more about what is right by God than popular with man. They care more about pleasing God who has the power to cast them into Hell for eternity rather than pleasing man. What is the worst man can do to a Christian? Murder the body but their soul goes to the Father.
Christians are bold as a lion. Christians are polite when name-called. Christians are respectful to those in authority even if they are evil or confused (see the example of Jesus). However, Jesus also overturned tables in the temple and whipped people. Christians are not afraid of being martyred. www.persecution.com
True Christians are still persecuted all over the world and still in the good old U.S.A. by modern day Pharisees and others who have a religious spirit. These people might read the bible and attend church and claim to know Christ but Christ is not in their heart because they have no fruit. Jesus says you will know them (His people) by their fruit. Jesus said that the world hated Him and if you are saved, then you will find that the world will reject you too.
It is imperative that we know the WHOLE truth about people or a situation before we evaluate. If we are misjudging a Christian, it is downright dangerous. We are also as Christians, held responsible not to set a stumbling block in front of others, like weaker Christians. We are responsible to build up and edify the church NOT to lead a bunch of weak Christians or sinners into more sin.
A man who tried to rape Heather as a child, he did of a heart attack right before his daughter was born. The man who raped Heather as an adult, he got a serious blood condition for a few years after that occurred. The husband who committed adultery on Heather, he lost the whole life and financial empire that Heather spent years building up for him.
God ALWAYS takes care of his own. Nothing might happen to people who talk, judge, and gossip about people of the world because that is the way the world works; however,
God promises consequences to those people who persecute and martyr His own, the sheep that follow His voice and never another. God's word never returns void. What happen to Herod? Sapphira? And a whole host of Kings who turned from God?
Mis-judging (or mis-representing) a Christian bring curses upon both a Christian or a non-Christian who mis-judges them or mistreats them on earth (we reap what we sow) but also eternal consequences (those who are not saved will face judgement and an eternity in hell). These consequences will occur more speedily if the afflicted Christian forgives and gives the situation to God and prays for the persecutors. Rest assured, after all the abuse Heather suffered, she has had lots of practice forgiving others, praying for them consistently, and trusting God to avenge (avenge is mine sayeth the Lord).
A lot of prophets of the Lord must walk out what they will have to preach first, e.g. Hosea.
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March 26, 2008, 8:16 pm PDT
This was a perfect example of the marriage I've been out of for four years with out the physical abuse from me. My ex seem to try every thing should could do to start a arguement would follow me out in the yard where ever to continue the fight even wake me up in the middle of the night. I've spent these 4 years getting back to who I am for a long period of time after seperation i regretted not hitting her but, Dr. Phil said it like it is there is never a reason to hit a woman, it is cowardly, chicken, and it takes away from who you really are. So my question is how does a person dare stick their neck out there again. |
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March 26, 2008, 11:41 pm PDT
Quote From: hrinks I know lots of women, including myself, who have been raped and abused as children and with #1 God & a belief/dedication/true abiding in Jesus have grown into beautiful merciful adults, loving parents, and excellent teachers. All of which I have been through and I probably make a better parent and teacher because of it.
Joyce Meyers was raped all her life by her father, she is amazing evangelist and a proud parent of, I think, 5 grown children who love her. Paula White was raped and, I think, prostituted out by her father who ended up committing suicide. Another amazing woman. Heather was raped and chose not to have an abortion because of her Christian beliefs.
Dr. Phil, who I would assume you respect, came from an alcoholic family.
Kevin has been through worse physical and emotional abuse than Heather and he also experienced sexual abuse too. The difference is that he did not seek the help and healing necessary for healing. Kevin turned to drugs, alcohol, abusing his wife, angry music, and lying/pride. Kevin hid who he was and his family hid who they were and this deception can happen to ANYONE. Lest we boast that we are "above" that and then we fall due to our pride. Those who have not been conned, count yourself lucky and blessed. Lots of intelligent, amazing, even God-fearing & believing women and men have made mistakes in selecting their marriage mate. Some could be prevented and some could not.
People CAN AND DO change when they get married, get pregnant, get fearful, have adultery, get saved or decide to out and out live for the devil, get addicted to alcohol or drugs, experience the death of their child, etc. As humans, we cannot predict our future or our mates future, we cannot predict what will happen, we simply must trust God if we have faith that nothing will be more than we can handle and we must trust God with the "whys" and the "when will we be delivered."
Their child is one of the smartest, more amazing children out there. Heather is teaching her morals, three languages - English, German, and Spanish (which for awhile Kevin thought was stupid!), math, etc.. the child knows the bible because of Heather's dedication and she reads on a 1st grade level. Heather was a well respected educator in Florida for many years before her marriage as well as working for the government to put together finances that had been destroyed by unethical people. It is not Heather or the child's fault that Kevin was trying to teach her evil worldly carnal things and that is precisely what Heather and Kevin fight over. Heather protected her daughter and did not give up where many other mothers or fathers would have, Heather gave up her careers, education, and her own happiness to make sure her daughter was not alone with Kevin or his parents who think cartoon porn is okay for children to see.
CPS could not provide a better environment. Prior to marrying Kevin, Heather was going to become the mother of 3 little girls in the foster care system and she went through all the training and extensive evaluation to do it. So CPS approved of Heather so did the public schools.
The truth needs to be told. God promises that those who curse true Christians or prophets of the Lord will have the curse turned around on themselves. God requires those who represent the Christian faith publicly to adhere to his statutes and commandments or they their pride will cause a fall. God expects Christians to tell the truth, to represent and help the oppressed, and to be facilitators of justice.
Amos 2:6b - 7
"... I will not reverse the punishment of it or revoke My word concerning it, because they have sold the [strictly just and uncompromisingly righteous for silver (or money or financial gain) and the needy for a paid or sandals;
They pant after [the sight of the poor [reduced to such misery that they will be throwing dust of the earth on their heads [in token of their grief; they defraud and turn aside the humble [who are too meek to defend themselves; and a man and his father will have sexual relations with the same maiden, so that My holy name is profaned."
Was Heather sold out for a very expensive pair of shoes? Was the truth spoken? Heather chose not to cuss at Kevin nor hit him. Heather does not believe that it is right for a woman to hit a man either. When Heather was raped she made a decision to forgive the man raping her and not gouge out his eyes and make him blind because she understood that he was overtaken by evil and did not understand (on a moral or spiritual level) what he was doing and that the rapist was repeating the abuse done to him to her and that it was about control.
Jesus - God's son, Stephan, Paul, Peter, Joan of Arc, and many others before were great prophets of the Lord and also very persecuted people. They did not do anything wrong to deserve being beaten and stoned. They spoke THE TRUTH and for THE TRUTH (and what is RIGHT) they were persecuted.
What makes these people different from everybody else? These are the people who are willing to die for what is right and moral. These are the people who make a difference and change the world. These people care more about what is right by God than popular with man. They care more about pleasing God who has the power to cast them into Hell for eternity rather than pleasing man. What is the worst man can do to a Christian? Murder the body but their soul goes to the Father.
Christians are bold as a lion. Christians are polite when name-called. Christians are respectful to those in authority even if they are evil or confused (see the example of Jesus). However, Jesus also overturned tables in the temple and whipped people. Christians are not afraid of being martyred. www.persecution.com
True Christians are still persecuted all over the world and still in the good old U.S.A. by modern day Pharisees and others who have a religious spirit. These people might read the bible and attend church and claim to know Christ but Christ is not in their heart because they have no fruit. Jesus says you will know them (His people) by their fruit. Jesus said that the world hated Him and if you are saved, then you will find that the world will reject you too.
It is imperative that we know the WHOLE truth about people or a situation before we evaluate. If we are misjudging a Christian, it is downright dangerous. We are also as Christians, held responsible not to set a stumbling block in front of others, like weaker Christians. We are responsible to build up and edify the church NOT to lead a bunch of weak Christians or sinners into more sin.
A man who tried to rape Heather as a child, he did of a heart attack right before his daughter was born. The man who raped Heather as an adult, he got a serious blood condition for a few years after that occurred. The husband who committed adultery on Heather, he lost the whole life and financial empire that Heather spent years building up for him.
God ALWAYS takes care of his own. Nothing might happen to people who talk, judge, and gossip about people of the world because that is the way the world works; however,
God promises consequences to those people who persecute and martyr His own, the sheep that follow His voice and never another. God's word never returns void. What happen to Herod? Sapphira? And a whole host of Kings who turned from God?
Mis-judging (or mis-representing) a Christian bring curses upon both a Christian or a non-Christian who mis-judges them or mistreats them on earth (we reap what we sow) but also eternal consequences (those who are not saved will face judgement and an eternity in hell). These consequences will occur more speedily if the afflicted Christian forgives and gives the situation to God and prays for the persecutors. Rest assured, after all the abuse Heather suffered, she has had lots of practice forgiving others, praying for them consistently, and trusting God to avenge (avenge is mine sayeth the Lord).
A lot of prophets of the Lord must walk out what they will have to preach first, e.g. Hosea.
I am confused, are you Heather? Or do you know her personally? And that scares me that you believe that rapists are just normal people who are taken over by evil... |
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March 28, 2008, 5:19 pm PDT
Quote From: vamomfan It was me that said that, not Dave.
I am not upset at all that he doesn't spend time with our daughter. It does however break my heart when she asks why her Daddy isn't like other kid's Dads and why he doesn't love her. It's a mixed up situation. She is afraid to go with him but at the same time she's desperate for him to show her attention.
Yes, the courts FORCED me to give visitation because he insisted on it and he was ready to back it up with a high-priced team of lawyers and a gaggle of buddies ready to swear I was the worst human in the world. It was either give visitation or lose her to him for good.
The point I was making is that he, like Kevin, made a big production about visitation so he could CONTROL where I live. He had no intention to actually spend time with her. It's all about CONTROL!
I am sorry that the court ordered him visitation. My foster mom urged me to NOT put the name of my daughter's father on her birth certificate, even though i was starry eyed back at age 18 and wanted to believe he and I would be together forever. I am SO GLAD I LISTENED. He turned out to be a satanist and a really messed up person indeed. She did get to meet him when I went wtih her to his house, but we have moved out of the state and she is now an adult herself, so he never had any visiting rights at ALL since it wasn't proven that he was the father, and, turned out, he WASN'T! THANK GOD!
I pray justice will be done for your daughter soon and that your husband will be touched by God and truly changed in his heart and life.
PL |
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March 31, 2008, 11:26 am PDT
Quote From: patiencern Did you see the cold look on Heather's face when her uncle offered them a home? Heather wouldn't be able to run her little game there. She would have to be responsible. She is loving driving her husband crazy and usung Penelope for ammunition, As soon as he is out of the house, Heather will have someone even worse in there and the games will continue. Penelope needs to go live with the uncle or in a foster home. Mommy needs to get her tubes tied and then go strut her stuff on the street. Daddy needs to choose a wife for her charatcar, not her bra-size. "You have condemned, you have murdered the just; he does not resist you." James 5:6 [Biblically, murder in the heart or thoughts is a sin according to Jesus - we can also murder reputations. "All unrighteousness is sin" 1 John 5:17a]
Heather is a responsible Christian mother and was going to be a foster mother for the state before she met Kevin. Heather was also a well respected public educator who taught & helped thousands of students in both non-profits and public schools. She was promoted to instructing teachers as well for one of the largest school systems in her state.
Heather will not get with someone worse. God has a good plan for her life and for all abusived women (look at Abigail who was married to a fool Nabal, God delivered her, and she married David). Look at Jesus, Stephan, Paul (after being converted to Christianity and Silas), Joan of Arc, and many other apostles, prophets, men & women of God who are persecuted by wicked people because they are filled with the light of God. Evil people hate the light. www.persecution.com
Heather is not perfect (no one is perfect except God) but she is good mother raising up her child with spiritual wisdom as well as the knowledge of this world which will pass away (all knowledge will be revealed when Christ returns). Heather would not prostitute herself out because above all things, she is a true Christian and true Christians obey the commandments. 1 Corinthians 6:15 - "Do you not know that you bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and then make them members of a harlot? Certianly not! Or do you not know that he who is joined to a harlot is one body with her? For "the two," He says, "shall become one flesh."
Christians must be born again and then must study Jesus and the Word so that they have their minds renewed and their lives transformed. James 1:21-23 "Therefore lay aside all filthiness and overflow of wickedness, and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls. But be doers of the Word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man observing his natural face in a mirror; for he observes himself, goes away, and immediately forgets what kind of man he was."
True Christians 1)Worship only God 2) Do not have idols - which can include yourself (pride & selfishness), pop psychologists (if you spend more time watching and listening to them than God), 3) Do not take the Lord's name in vain 4)Remember the Sabbath, to keep it holy 5)Honor your father and mother 6)Do not murder 7)Do not commit adultery 8)Do not steal 9) Do not bear false witness or lie 10) Do not cover.
They do not divorce unless adultery is committed. And they can choose to reconcile and show grace and mercy. They do not have sex before marriage. Christian are as a bold as a lion and they are not afraid of demons and the demonic when they remember that "greater is He who lives in me, than he that is in the world." True Christians guard their child as their child are blessing from the Lord and they will not allow their children to go off with unGodly people, whether they are relatives or not.
Father God, please bless this viewer and all the other viewers. Remove the scales from the eyes of thier heart and give them true spiritual discernment based in God's truth (Jesus as their salvation) not the carnal prideful knowledge of this world which is passing away. Remove their stony hearts and exchange them for soft tender ones. Break them, mold them, guide them, and lead them in to a into a clear, true knowledge of you and bring harvestors in their paths who will show them the Truth and the light. In Jesus name, I rebuke the demonic coming through this message and all the other one's on all these messageboards. All word curses be broken. According to the Jesus, if we speak the Word and have faith as a mustard seed it will be done. Elijah was a man with a nature like ours (like Heather's) and he prayed earnestly that it wouldnot rain; and it did not rain on the land for three years and sixt months. Bless all the people who watch Dr. Phil and bring them into the Light of Christ and the true knowledge of God. Protect and bless all those who are unfairly persecuted, judged, and condemned in the US, on tv, and in the world. "Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness sake, For theirs is the kingdom of Heaven." Matthew 5:11 Thank you Father for giving Heather and ALL of her relatives the grace and mercy from You which enables them to forgive Kevin, his family, and all the lies & judgements. Help our nation of Christians obey the commandment, though shall not bear false witness. If they struggle with this in their careers or in their recreational time, convict them and bring them to repentance. Amen |
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