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Topic : 03/13 DNA Dramas

Number of Replies: 421
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Created on : Friday, November 02, 2007, 11:42:49 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 11/05/07) Dr. Phil tackles the emotionally-charged topic of DNA tests. Over 300,000 paternity tests are done every year, 100,000 of which actually prove a father has been previously misidentified. Dr. Phil’s guest, Terrie, claims one of her grandchildren does not look like any of the men on her side of the family, and definitely not like her son, Adam. Terrie has called her daughter-in-law, Diane, a "bald-faced liar" and "a crazy woman," and Diane says her mother-in-law is dead to her! Is Terrie just a meddling mother-in-law, or is she right in thinking her son is not her grandson’s biological father? When Dr. Phil reads the results of a top-notch DNA test, will her fears be legitimized or put to rest? And what will they mean for the feuding in-laws? Then, meet Kristie, who says that after a brief affair, she found out she was pregnant. When she told the father, she says he changed his phone number and disappeared … until Dr. Phil found him. A hidden camera captures the moment when a Dr. Phil’s investigator tracks down the alleged father-to-be -- and you won’t believe his reaction. Will he take responsibility? Or will Kristie’s next rendezvous with her former paramour take place before a judge? Share your thoughts here.

Find out what happened on the show.

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November 3, 2007, 8:56 pm CDT

hmm

Quote From: trollhappy

I believe that the father should have continued the relationship with the daughter.  Nothing should have changed.  How could he love her one day and not the next.  I do have a problem with a man paying child support for a child that isn't his.  But my biggest problem with this whole show was that there was no mention of the biological father.  This child deserves the right to know her biological father and the father deserves the right to have a relationship with his daughter.  The have both been deprived.  As far as I am concerned this woman has committed the crime of child abuse and child neglect.  She deceived everyone.

My husband and I just found out he has a 14 year old son.  When he was dating his x-girlfriend he made it perfectly clear that he didn't want anymore children.  He also made that perfectly clear to me when we met.  He already had a son that was 7 when I met him and he had a crazy x-wife to deal with.  He and his girlfriend broke up and he never saw her again.  Now 14 years later she has served him with child support papers and brought the child to our house unannounced to introduce him to his father.  We just had a DNA test done this week but looking at him he probably is his son.  I can not believe this woman thought she could raise this child and he would never care about who his daddy was.  She too committed a crime!!

I could not believe the way he told this child he was not her father. Then just up in walk out her life. how can you love a child all her life then just stop? he was selfish. I do understand his hurt, but not his reaction to her. She was just a child. Far as her mother she was just wrong for letting it go own like that. That child does not know no one as her father but him. I wonder will she try to find out about her real father. He mom has alot of explaining to do to her.
 
November 3, 2007, 9:44 pm CDT

what crime????

Quote From: trollhappy

I believe that the father should have continued the relationship with the daughter.  Nothing should have changed.  How could he love her one day and not the next.  I do have a problem with a man paying child support for a child that isn't his.  But my biggest problem with this whole show was that there was no mention of the biological father.  This child deserves the right to know her biological father and the father deserves the right to have a relationship with his daughter.  The have both been deprived.  As far as I am concerned this woman has committed the crime of child abuse and child neglect.  She deceived everyone.

My husband and I just found out he has a 14 year old son.  When he was dating his x-girlfriend he made it perfectly clear that he didn't want anymore children.  He also made that perfectly clear to me when we met.  He already had a son that was 7 when I met him and he had a crazy x-wife to deal with.  He and his girlfriend broke up and he never saw her again.  Now 14 years later she has served him with child support papers and brought the child to our house unannounced to introduce him to his father.  We just had a DNA test done this week but looking at him he probably is his son.  I can not believe this woman thought she could raise this child and he would never care about who his daddy was.  She too committed a crime!!

 What crime you talking of.... I agree with you rversion/comment on phil story but as for you adn your husband's situation, He was the one that even you claim made it VERY clear that He didnt want anythin gto do with more kids' and though I myself would have told him had I been in ex girlfriend shoes to see if he changed his mind or not,...she dont owe that to him, she only did what she felt was best for her son, given the opinion of th efather  then apparently made sure the son knew truth of his father and let the son decide what his wishes were and apparently helped the son locate the father.
I had similar situation except my fiance knew I was pregnant and made me choose him or the baby, I chose the baby yet tried at least 3 times a year to get him to accept his son and it wasnt till my son turned 12 yrs. old and said it wasnt fair that I wouldnt make his father whom had money help financially at least so things were not so tuff on all us, I was paying expensive dental care,....but to me it was worth it and I didnt want to bother his father again, though  th edoor was open to him to do as he wished,.......
My son wanted to get child support though his father claimed he made less than he did and got away with it, we all know truth and  my son is grown now and a soldier, his father is very much loved by him though the father is too selfish to return equal love/concern,--I didnt need DNA but it was done at 99.999% he was/is father--he didnt need it either just wanted to prolong everything....I kept my promise to never go after support myself but, my son's wishes/desires over-rode that promise and I dont care how that makes the father or anyone else feel my kids always come first with me and MEN that claim to not want children should wear protection or get fixed permanately and not leave it all up to woman cause even though doctor s told me it was impossibility for me to get pregnant again, I have a wonderful  son and another after him to prove GOD makes impossible Possible soemtimes------You should blame your husband for having such an jackass opinion of never wanting kids then NOT having made certain for himself instead he took the easy way out and left the women with all th eresponsibility of everything.
My ex. fiance told me he was sterile,..he lied cause he produced another child with another woman a year after our son was concieved and then just laughed about it, I had/have  medical legal documents to say  it was medically impossible for me to concieve.
I cant stand it when MEN dont want kids and then dont get fixed to make sure and blame it all on the women--that is just as bad as women that lie about  whom father is and/or use th echild to get what they want.
No crime was committed either except unless you want to say morally and then the blame goes on both biological parents....the best thin gto do now is to not worry about why and who to blame and just move positively forward as this is a blessing regardless of circumstances cause there is a child/young man that can bring lots of joy if, adults are willing to nurture and accept..
 
November 3, 2007, 10:01 pm CDT

I treat my

Quote From: zuboo8

this issue was tackled the week of 10/29 with Enrique and Maria, the non-bio father who ceased a r'ship with his 'daughter' after he found out DNA test. My stance is in support of these men not having to pay for children that are not theirs. Women in this situation made the decisions of who they have intercourse with, they can be responsible for the consequences and ensuring the right man is paying his share.

The law is currently built around the best interest of the child. Yet men are being punished w/o recourse. Take the instance of a stepparent or parents. If a divorce occurs, there is no legal recourse to a stepparent to continue to monetarily or emotionally contribute; in fact, they have NO rights to continue the r'ship with the children unless one parent deems it acceptable. So why are men the scapegoats for children that are not theirs biologically? They essentially have the same r'ship with the child as a stepparent does: (hopefuly) an emotional bond - that's it.

Pardon my bouncing from subject to subject. I am married to a woman who's ex-husband is over 19k in arrears and does not have medical coverage for 'his' daughter.  Both the child support and medical coverage were court ordered in March of 2005. It would take me 20 paragraphs of 15 to 20 scentences to explain in part what this man has put a ten year old through. He has Tourettes Syndrome and seeks no help for his malady. Nichole, ( my wife and his daughter) has a some-what slight case of the same as she is being treated for  'ADHD'.  This ex-husband has amoung other things, not returned Nichole after his summer visitation ceased, to my wife and I in Texas, cost me my job by fileing false charges againt me requiring me to go to NJ to face them; cost my family and I to ask for  assistance from the state of Texas and friends and family to pat rent and utilities. With every item I point out, there are five or mor items that come to mind. I think of Nichole as my own and would pay finicial support as well as moral support for her if my wife and I divorced. I do not make the money the guest does yet I have empathy and sympathy for the plight his ex-wife put him and THEI DAUGHTE in.

James

 
November 4, 2007, 1:35 pm CST

DNA test results for Paternity

 I feel that if a paternity test has been done and the father finds out the child is not his. He should still be involved with the child as far as a father is concerned. The relationship between the father and the child should not change. However, I feel the father should not have to pay child support. At this point the mother should go after the sperm donner for the child support. I cannot call him a father because he has never acted as one. I don't feel that any money the father has contributed should be given back though. Because at the time he was contributing to the child. Now if the father wants to contribute to the childs well being on his own, this is great!

Thank you,
Sherryle Wenzel
 
November 4, 2007, 6:56 pm CST

it's a good thing!

families can be so judgemental, where there is a question of paternity. it's as though, ALL of them were present at the time of conception! or at least they claim to know EVERYTHING!  my alleged father's family is this way; and it is a damn shame, because he is dead now. they don't want anything to do with my twin sister or myself. i have 5 great kids, that anyone would be proud to have in their family; but the doubts keep that from happening.

i am glad to see Dr. Phil addressing this matter, for the whole family's sake, but especially for the child. i grew up feeling less-than my friends, and undeserving of a father's love; no child should feel that way. children cannot choose HOW they are brought into this world, after all. thank you Dr. Phil, for helping to make the child feel worthy.

 
November 4, 2007, 7:02 pm CST

I disagree

Quote From: sherryle

 I feel that if a paternity test has been done and the father finds out the child is not his. He should still be involved with the child as far as a father is concerned. The relationship between the father and the child should not change. However, I feel the father should not have to pay child support. At this point the mother should go after the sperm donner for the child support. I cannot call him a father because he has never acted as one. I don't feel that any money the father has contributed should be given back though. Because at the time he was contributing to the child. Now if the father wants to contribute to the childs well being on his own, this is great!

Thank you,
Sherryle Wenzel

The mother is a cheat, a liar, and a thief. The duped man should be allowed to sue his ex wife and get a judgement for the money. She can pay it off in payments. She can get a second job. Men do it all the time. They should make it like child support, put her in jail if she gets behind. This has nothing to do with the child, she stole money, she pays it back. Simple.

 
November 5, 2007, 12:57 am CST

GRANDMA'S DON'T ACT LIKE THIS!!!!!

DOES ANY ONE STOP TO THINK ABOUT THE LITTLE BOY IN THIS WHOLE DRAMA MESS?I WONDER IF HE THINKS"WHY DOES MY GRANDMA HATE MY MOM?"THIS IS THE BOY'S GRANDMA,AND NOW SHE'S MAKING THIS LITTLE BOY THINK THAT HIS DAD IS NOT HIS DAD!!! WHAT A TERRIBLE THING TO DO TO A CHILD!!! SHE DOES'NT DESERVE TO BE A GRANDMA!!!!

 

 
November 5, 2007, 6:19 am CST

Similar to 10/29

This is similar to the 10/29 show except it is the mother-in-law not the new wife posing the problem. I just feel for the child who will lose either way.
 
November 5, 2007, 6:29 am CST

Good Luck Grandma

In watching the show it's obvious who the crazy ones are.....and it's not you Grandma!
 
November 5, 2007, 7:30 am CST

legal issues

It should be noted that in some states, such as West Virginia, if the parents are legally married at the time of the child's birth, the legal husband is considered the child's father, even if a DNA test proves otherwise. It is deemed against the interests of public policy to bastardize the child, and this has been upheld by the Supreme Court of Appeals of the state of West Virginia. Gloria Allred is probably aware of this policy even though California law may differ, but she could not get a word in edgewise on the show. Thus, it really matters whether or not the battling parents were legally married, and also who the "psychological father" is and how long he has been in the child's life. The "best interests of the child" are upheld by the court.
 
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