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Topic : 06/02 Banned From the Wedding

Number of Replies: 2261
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Created on : Friday, November 02, 2007, 11:50:57 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 11/08/07) A bride-to-be takes on her future mother-in-law in an ugly feud that has torn a family apart. The wedding day is fast approaching and the best man has resigned, the aunt has disowned the groom, and the wedding planner is on alert to call the police if the mother-in-law shows up -- which she’s threatened to do! Michelle says she cannot stand her future mother-in-law, Jane, whom she thinks has a sick and inappropriate relationship with her son, Jay. Jane thinks Michelle is a cold-hearted “you know what” who has stolen her only son. She says unless they hire a hit man, they can’t stop her from being at the wedding. Jay stands by his fiancée, which is why his whole family is saying they won’t attend the wedding. Has Michelle manipulated Jay? What happens when the mother of the bride and the soon-to-be mother-in-law come face to face for the first time in four months? Can Dr. Phil cut through the drama and heal this family feud? Tell us what you think.

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November 8, 2007, 6:40 am CST

Jane I hope you read this and take it to heart.

Dear Jane, Life is short. Time goes by fast. The older I get the faster time flies. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain by letting go of all your hurts, all your frustrations and saying, "I want to be a part of your lives and I will do what it takes to mend the fences." I promise you, if you will just let go of everything and not worry about who started what or who's at fault your life will be much richer. This is not about losing face or backing down. This is about doing what it takes to straighten this out. You'ld be surprised at how easy this would be to do. You'ld be surprised at how much better you will feel and how much fuller your life will be. Like that country song says "Don't blink" Please don't waste any more precious time. You can't get it back. I have taken the high road many times and am a better person for it. Some day, all I will be is an urn of ashes.(My daughter and son cannot hug an urn of ashes.) Someday all I will be is a memory. I want to be a good memory in the minds and hearts of my loved ones.  I want to live my life to the fullest and experience all the joy I can before my journey ends. Jane, be a hero and take the high road. I can promise you, from my own experience, it's the only thing to do.
 
November 8, 2007, 6:43 am CST

good luck

     The bride needs to grow up.  If she ever has children she may see the light.  This guy is marrying a very selfish girl.  Someone needs be the hero.  Does it matter who said what????   SELFISH BRIDE!!!  If this is all about one day, good luck with the marriage!!!!
 
November 8, 2007, 6:48 am CST

Take the high ground

Both the bride & mother in law are disrespectful to each other.  And neither will back down.  The bride is on a control trip and heaven help the groom.  If this bride does not wake up and realize that to prevent the groom's family from seeing him get married (and this mother in law's only child) is starting her life on the wrong foot.  Eventually the groom will resent her.  And if she is such a control freak, just wait until her children do the same thing to her.  There is an old saying, what goes around comes around.  I am not condoning the name calling that both women are doing, but what the bride needs to do, is what all future daughter in laws learn....when given advice that you don't want, just smile and do what you want.  By demeaning what the mother in law did for the decorations is purely mean.  The bride is spiteful by threatening the mother in law with never seeing her son or grandchildren. Also, the bride needs to know that whatever is posted on the internet the entire world can read.  DON'T post something and say just don't read it.  You are too old to be on a My Space page and posting angry comments about your mother in law to be.   That is just spiteful and I don't understand why the groom doesn't tell you to stop.  Although, the son & mother may have a close relationship before the bride came along, it is up to the son to make clear that his mother will be in his life, but his first piority is to his wife.  He will always love his mother, but also has a new family to take care of.  I feel that the groom is a pawn of the bride.  Groom, insist your your family is invited.  To the families...everyone just smile on the wedding day and let by gones be by gones for the sake of unity.  If no one wants to talk to each other after, then fine.  Don't be goaded into a fight, take the high ground no matter who starts it.  You can't have an arguement if the other person doesn't respond.  
 
November 8, 2007, 6:48 am CST

Thursday's show

I have only one child, a son.  I would be horrified if he cut off communication with me.  He's my life.  The mother on today's show has EVERY right to feel the way she does. The son really shouldn't be so cold to his mother.

 
November 8, 2007, 6:48 am CST

Red Alert

Quote From: simonjrt3

My was suppose to be future mother in law dis owned her grandkids and called me slut trash and that she can't excuse the kids being bastard children...... 1 month from our wedding!!!  The wedding is cancelled and we are in thearpy.  He hit me after I called his mother an ignorant redneck which obviously she is after all the things she did and he hit me because of it.  therefore counseling counseling counseling but I don't htink it is working but this story is for sure ment to be ours!!!  this is crazy!  Wish Dr Phil could bring some calmness in our life :(  Much needed.  I am so miserable in life I can only imagine what they are going through.

Pick up your kids and run for the hills!!!  NEVER EVER stand for ANY man hitting you!!!

 

There IS NOT a happily ever after in your future with this man!!  Besides, if he'd hit for what you said, imagine what he would do to you OR your CHILDREN in the future!!!!  Leave now before you are six feet under and your children have NO mother!!

 

And the I'm sorry/I'll never do it again comments from him.........LIES!!  He will do it again and he ISN"T SORRY!!!

 

Get out NOW before it is TOO LATE and MUCH MORE EXPENSIVE(in more ways than the obvious!)!!!!!

 

Been there, done that!

Mgrlady

 
November 8, 2007, 6:54 am CST

im with you joykelly

im on with the bride. the same thing happened to me and everybody thought i was bananas. it was a situation where the mother thought bad of me but to all others she was normal. it was so confusing. and when i lashed back i was looked at as a trouble maker. we are not married yet but when we do, which is quickly approaching, i dont know if i want her to ruin MY day. because it is MY day.
 
November 8, 2007, 6:59 am CST

11/08 Banned From the Wedding

Quote From: lorinnor

I have only one child, a son.  I would be horrified if he cut off communication with me.  He's my life.  The mother on today's show has EVERY right to feel the way she does. The son really shouldn't be so cold to his mother.

why is it so hard for paople to understand that a persons mother can be the destructive one? if she is so right, the mother,  she needs to let him find that out on his own. and if he realizes that his new wife is crazy, then his mother should be a safe place to fall, not someone to say i told you so.

 
November 8, 2007, 7:06 am CST

2 bad relationships not 1.

Both sides have one common denominator: 'fiance and son'.  Here is where lays

silent the hero that should have been.  First and foremost he must not loose a relationship

in order to gain another.  What is he?  No matter what he thinks he has in a relationship with his fiance

he does not have that, same for with his mother, he does not have it.

If he cannot handle de-escalating the problems long before they got this bad he will suck as a husband.

If he cannot keep a relationship with his mother and still have a growing one with his wife to be, he will fail as a head of household.   He is the common link that is the prize in a battle, he is living it!

Mom is wrong but any Mom would go out of wack in this scenereo.

Wife to be is trying to win a total complete man that no other woman can have, that stinks mental cliff hanger.  No  matter what anyone see's here, it is obvious a marragie will fail one day because

it will begin on such evil plans?

 
November 8, 2007, 7:10 am CST

11/08 Banned From the Wedding

Quote From: housewife52

Dear Jane, Life is short. Time goes by fast. The older I get the faster time flies. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain by letting go of all your hurts, all your frustrations and saying, "I want to be a part of your lives and I will do what it takes to mend the fences." I promise you, if you will just let go of everything and not worry about who started what or who's at fault your life will be much richer. This is not about losing face or backing down. This is about doing what it takes to straighten this out. You'ld be surprised at how easy this would be to do. You'ld be surprised at how much better you will feel and how much fuller your life will be. Like that country song says "Don't blink" Please don't waste any more precious time. You can't get it back. I have taken the high road many times and am a better person for it. Some day, all I will be is an urn of ashes.(My daughter and son cannot hug an urn of ashes.) Someday all I will be is a memory. I want to be a good memory in the minds and hearts of my loved ones.  I want to live my life to the fullest and experience all the joy I can before my journey ends. Jane, be a hero and take the high road. I can promise you, from my own experience, it's the only thing to do.
I see your point clearly however, this daughter in law is a self center child that wants the son all to herself, I agree with the mother in law (Jane) when she said that her son has enough love for both women in his life. The daughter should also give. The daughters mother is blind to how Jane feels, she is not shown disrespect by the son so she has no idea what it fees like . The son is exactly what his uncle says "he doesn't have the balls to stand up to his wife, he couldn't even show his face. I have two daughters, and a son. If my son's girlfien treated me the way this girl treats is mother, but I know that would never happen because my son would never allow it. My oldest daughter hasa bit of an idoit for a husband but when I butt in it gets me nowhere, I have learned to just be there when she needs me, I worry when I have not heard from her, since he doesn't let her have a house phone, and she has two small children and another on the way . Three weeks ago he "let" her come to visit, old her she could have a break from the children for once, then whe she called him to pick her up (he carries a cell phone) he told her no, he wants a divorce and he is keeping the girls. So this guy can be a nut and nothing I can do about it either, children become adults and parents no longer have a say.I think this family has man people to blame, I have no doubt  that Dr. Phil has done nothing to bring this family together, at least that what was shown on the show.
 
November 8, 2007, 7:15 am CST

11/08 Banned From the Wedding

Quote From: lorinnor

I have only one child, a son. I would be horrified if he cut off communication with me. He's my life. The mother on today's show has EVERY right to feel the way she does.The son really shouldn't be so cold to his mother.

And the mother shouldn't be such a b****, either.
 
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