Topic : 06/11 Scary Skinny

Jessica is a sad girl that has never felt loved in her life!!  Yes, she has an eating disorder but it stems from her internal conflicts.  As I watched, I became emotional and just wanted to hug her.  When Dr. Phil introduced her Mom she had this look on her face that said, " Whatever."  She would not come up on stage because WHY??? she does not like to be  the center of attention!!  Lady, you are the center of attention because I beleive you are a major part of Jessica's problem.  When her daughter is openly sad and scared, and dying.... not one tear as the camera showed her reaction.  Shame on her.  As a mother, when my children are sad or upset, I want to make the hurt go away.

Lastly,  I understand the sister said they are not a family that openly says , "I love you"... learn to say it and show it before it is too late.

Thankyou for understanding.  I agree.  I am learning to accept her unconditionally and not focus solely on the anorexia.  (I wish I could sue that counsellour for 5 trillion dollars!!!  And I have never sued anyone yet.) 

My daughter is not in counselling at this time, but is a practicing anorexic.  On a possitive note... she is now eating 2 times a day and making better food choices.  And she calls herself an anorexic which before she was in denial and  would not admit she was anorexic.  I try to be subtle when I try to help her and make her think she thought of it herself.  I bought this magazine that had an anorexia article and left it around the house, but NOT in her room.  And she found it and CAME TO ME and said:  Hey Mom did you see in this magazine?  Olivia Newton John's daughter had anorexia.  I said:  WHAT?  What are you talking about?  And she told me all about it and I said  Wow really?  (She is her own person and has got to make her own decisions or they don't stick and it's like pulling teeth or worse.)  Anorexics choose to be friends and close to those who SUPPORT and don't criticize their anorexia.  And CLOSE OUT those who don't to GREAT EXTREMES.  It is a lifestyle of lying and secretiveness.  And this is the reason for the coldness.  But today I am preparing for her birthday party this week.  I got lots of little surprizes planned I hope she likes.... and I am making her one of those doll cakes.... (My grandma made me one of those every year and decorated... perhaps childish, but a tradition I looked forward too.)....

......Just hoping for the day when you don't have to worry, wonder or have any heartache about anything...

As I read the message board, it took me awhile to decide if I wanted to write my thoughts.  My intentions for leaving my thoughts on this message board are in hopes to let anyone suffering from and eating disorder will start to believe they can beat ED! 

I am winning my battle against ED, thanks to fantastic help offered from Dr Phil and the Center for Change in Orem UT.

I can finally say I am living my life without Ed.  I do have my daily struggles, when Ed creeps into my mind everyone and while, but I am learning to ignore him and realize, I have control and can tell him to SHUT UP! I want to thank everyone for you words of support and encouragement.  Some of the expressions said about my mother were words I would have never wanted anyone to use My mom loves me and I know that- its just shown in ways the world may not understand-

Thank you Center for Change and Dr Phil, you gave me my life back- I will forever be grateful.

Jessica Mills

Dear Unpredictable,

You wrote:   <<<Now I really don't want to make this a race issue but I don't know a African-American walking this earth who would do this to there body, >>> 

Well...as far as a "race issue" it's TOO LATE---you just "created" it!!  RACE was not the issue on this program (nor is it a topic of this particular board).  You really ought to get out from in front of your television more often! ---but Instead of purging, literally, why not go "volunteer" your time with the "less fortunate" than you?

Reading your postings  I doubt very much that you demonstrate how to make  <<<a health choice to correct the imperfections>>>.  To be bringing racism into all this a sign of imbalances in your life.

You look down your nose at these people: you find it despicable.  Well then please consider----

Has there ever been anything about your self you've ever found unlikeable?----

Are you still able to make a quality decision to love yourself, in spite of small imperfections you find?

If you still can love your SELF, then please think on this:  Reflect that if "everyone" is so "entitled" (as you say), then how much of  "a reach" would it be?  Can you extend that gracing of entitlement to others?  With the "strength" and the "health of mind you possess" then, certainly -- a person of greatness finds their strength in compassion, somewhere?