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Topic : 04/07 Will Fights

Number of Replies: 250
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Created on : Thursday, November 08, 2007, 07:36:51 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 11/13/07) Has an inheritance that seemed at first like a stroke of good fortune become a dividing force in your family? Meet four sisters bitterly fighting over their aunt’s inheritance. Virginia's original will divided her estate four ways: Pat, Linda and Barbara would each receive $10,000 and Carol, the youngest, would get the remainder of the trust -- approximately $400,000. But the inheritance was split six ways to include Linda’s two kids after Aunt Virginia went to live with Linda. Barbara says she can’t imagine why her aunt would change the trust unless Linda manipulated her. Does Barbara have a case against her sister, or is she just being the family troublemaker? Their mother, Fran, drops a bombshell about the real reason the will was changed. Then, Sondra says she and her husband, Patrick, fight constantly since they blew his $100,000 inheritance in less than a year. After purchasing five new cars, a new TV and furniture, they can’t afford to pay for their daughter’s college tuition. How can this couple end the battle over the buck? Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

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November 13, 2007, 8:55 am CST

Peaceful Now

It is a real shame when you have those in a family that depend on someone's death to help them with their retirement plan.  I have one like this in my family.  They have stated to everyone they are glad that my parents have died but still moan to anyone that will listen years later that they didn't get what they thought they should have.  I even caught hell trying to pay final funeral expenses out of my own money because this one thought I was using money that should go to them.  I would rather have my parents here with me than all the money & property in the world.  I have been left with the feeling of being an only child but it does have an upside in all this because it has been peaceful never having to deal with them again. 
 
November 13, 2007, 10:43 am CST

11/13 Will Fights

My grandmother left her estate (small as it was) to be divided equally among all 6 of her children. But I have an uncle who lived with her ALL his life....even after he married. She stipulated in her will that he was to live there as long as he wished. He was furious that she didn't give him everything. He told my mother that he hoped he outlived them all. So far 2 of my uncles and my only aunt have died. My mother is 80, and her health is failing. Looks like my uncle just may get his wish. But my mom has 4 children, 6 grandchildren and 5 great grandchildren who love her. My uncle never had children. So I think  my mom  is probably the more fortunate one.
 
November 13, 2007, 11:22 am CST

Family is not measured by financial worth

If having this money means more to you than a relationship with your sisters or your family you deserve the money and all that comes with it.

 
November 13, 2007, 11:32 am CST

Vultures have more class

"Vultures have more class."  That was a phrase my dad used when his uncle died.  Uncle Joe had died on Sunday evening, Dad was notified Monday morning & before he could even get to his home (about an hour away) other family members had CLEANED THE HOUSE OUT!!!  Dad was the executor & the one with power of attorney.  My dad just could not believe what a bunch of greedy, grabby people we had related to him.  That was over 30 years ago!!!

 

Shortly before my dad died 7-1/2 years ago, Dad mentioned that story cause his mother & my MIL had passed away.  He was still disgusted at the actions of these family members, eventhough they too had passed on.  As fate would have it, Dad's death came jost a few months later.  I saw some very disturbing attitudes and actions come from MY OWN siblings!!!  This broke my heart.

 

My mom is still with us, thankfully.  But I dread the day that she is gone as well.  I fear that that ugliness will rear it's horrible, ugly, frightening head once again.  This will be much to the detriment of the memory of my parents & everything they ever taught us!

 

I decided when Dad died and I saw the nastiness that I would basically walk away when Mom passes on.  I don't want to be an ugly vulture.  I want to protect the memory of my parents and what they stood for.  I'D RATHER HAVE THE MEMORY OF MY PARENTS' & THEIR MORALS/BELIEFS INTACT!!!  Money, property and all the in-fighting will not preserve that.

 

So when you see loved ones fighting over "what's mine", remember this..."Vultures have more class."  Love ya, Daddy!!

 
November 13, 2007, 12:41 pm CST

Aunt Virginia became wiser at the end.

It seems so much fairer to divide the money evenly. I expect Aunt Virginia thought the youngest was her favorite when she was a cute little girl. Once they were all grown, the years had passed and the older, Linda had cared for her in her old age, it makes perfect sense that Virginia would have changed her will to make a more even distribution.

Neither am I surprised that Linda was writing lots of Virginia's checks at the end. Medical costs can sky rocket at the end of life. Caring for an elder relative in your own home is a huge job and a great sacrifice. Even if Virginia had left all of her money to Linda, I wouldn't have blamed her.
 
November 13, 2007, 12:41 pm CST

11/13 Will Fights

I know to a lot of people watching this show it is hard for them to understand why money has become such a huge battle within the families and are in shock at what they are hearing and the actions everyone takes when money is involved. This is one topic that I am unfortunately too familiar with. My grandfather passed away and when he did all hell broke loose. Relationships were lost and greed became evil. An estate and money were both factors for my mother, 3 aunts and 3 uncles. The will had been established for years prior to my grandfather passing however that didn't stop my one aunt (who was the executor) from stirring up the pot and causing everyone turmoil. There were certain things in my grandfathers will that were to be disbursed to each of the family members and a certain amount of money that was to be given to each of them. My aunt disagreed with those terms therefore she started lying about the amount of money that were in bank accounts and how much the estate was really worth. She didn't want anyone involved in anything except for herself so that she could hide and be deceitful about what was really going on. Therefore it upset everyone and they didn't want to have anything to do with her once it was all said and done. They all ended up getting an attorney involved to research the accounts and appraisal documents so that my aunt would not keep taking advantage of my deceased grandfathers belongings. My grandfather would have never put her in charge if he would of known the outcome and and ignorant behavior she was displaying. They felt they couldn't trust their sister with anything. If she was going to manipulate them and lie about money of my grandfathers and short all of them for her own selfishness than she wasn't being true to herself, to my grandfather or to any of them and nobody wants a relationship with someone like that, regardless if they are family or not.  It's the honest truth regardless how ugly it sounds! Some of my family members needed that money to pay for treatments for their illnesses while she was buying new cars and homes. Of course everyone wanted to walk away and move on but they continued to fight for my grandfathers wishes and because they too needed the money.

 

It's very sad that things like this happen however; unfortunately, whether people want to admit it or not money makes this world go round-everyone needs it and wants it regardless what your lifestyle is like. 

 
November 13, 2007, 12:56 pm CST

Greedy family members...


If this show were aired in a language I did not even understand,
it was not hard to figure out which one was the vulture. The mouthy
woman with the short hair with the heavy accent was clearly showing
her claws.

Ah, been there, done that with my own husband's family. Youngest
sibling has been 'working ' on mother and father for years. Finally managed to
convince Alzheimer's-ridden father that she and she alone should be the
sole heir to all the land, all the money. Mother agreed, severed all ties
with the other kids and went along with the plan.

Money was not an issue to the remaining six brothers and sisters, the
greedy sister could have it all, for all they cared.

Daughter tricks daddy into signing over all rights while they are still alive,
Mamma is sent to the nursing home, state is now paying for her care because
"she is broke", Daddy has one foot in the grave, and the daughter is just waiting
for the bucket to tumble.

With the exception of the other half sibling off doing his own drug-infested thing, the other
siblings have banded together to remain what is left of the family.
As we toast one another this season, we hope she's happy. Twenty acres,
a house and no one but her own two kids to call a family. Happy Holidays!

 
 
November 13, 2007, 12:58 pm CST

todays show

Dr Phil, I tip my hat to you today. All of the people on your show were okay people. Your advice was just great and right on.

 

No sense sweating the small stuff. Life goes on. Pick up the pieces and move on. No one is perfect, but no one can continue life dwelling on past mistakes.

 

Great show, great advice.

 
November 13, 2007, 1:08 pm CST

last couple

 In watching the husband and listening to his words, it seems that more than the lost money, this man is grieving the loss of his father, and the home his dad built. Perhaps if his grief over these losses are addressed, the money part of it will be inconsequential.
I wish them well.

 
November 13, 2007, 1:12 pm CST

Please take a true look at whats bothering you

You need to count your blessings.   If you are all healthly and have a good home you are truly blessed.

 
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