Topic : 06/16 A Daughter in Danger?

I have myspace and so does my kids. But I am always aware of who they are talking to. They do not go into the chat rooms there. Most of their friends on their page are local kids. What I dont understand if this girl was talking to this guy 2 yrs ago and the family found out, why did they keep a computer in the house. They should of put a password on the computer where she couldnt log on. Referring to the phone calls, 20 calls a day who was paying for the phone bills? All parents should be aware of who they are talking to on the phone. I know I am always asking my 15 yr old son and my 19 yr old daughter who they talk to on the phone.  I feel for this family and hopefully they can get her back home safely.

that she DID run away at 16! SHE WAS/IS RETURNED BY THE AUTHORITIES TO THER MOTHER!  Then she ran away 2 weeks AFTER she turned 18!

Apperently she WANTS to be with the man she loves(still unconfirmed by mom and the show that he IS abusing her and STILL we dont know if its a fact or not). SHE IS 18! Mom or the law now cant touch her IF she doesnt want to come back, and you cant make her come back if she doesnt want to. ONLY SHE (the daughter) cant leave if she wants to not Dr Phil or anyone.

I am thinking the mom needs to cut the cord and quit with this, mom DOES talk to her on the phone (everyday and/or everyother day from the show)and CAN hear her voice and KNOW she is alive. And she CAN see her on the show as well. The mom is going overboard with this. IF AND I SAY IF he is being abusive to her she can leave (from what it sounds she still dont have a VISA,which is what he IS supposed to get 2 years ago). SHE HAS TO LEAVE ON HER OWN, NOT BY THE FAMILIES WILL!

Many families dont/cant accept the new man in a persons life. My mother did the same thing, but I learned on my own and made my own choices.

Really this isnt a kidnapping if she left AFTER turning 18 and on her own!BEFORE when she was 16,yes it was. NOW it isnt! This is going overboard with the family. She is 18 and needs to live her life and mom needs to cut the cord.

First I would agree with Dr. Phil  that it is not OK for this girl to do what she has/will done/do for the following reasons:

1. She is less than 25 years old and she can't predict the consequences of her behavior. Having said that and as I mentioned in a previous posting, this is a gap between law and science. Law is allowing this girl to do and keep doing what she is doing, the science says she is not mature enough to predict the very important and critical things that she got herself involved in.
2. If possible, Abdullah should be asked the following question" Would he allow his sister to know and love an American who is not Muslim and leave her family and join him in US against the will of her brother Abdullah and the rest of her family, having an intimate relation with that man" I think if his sister does so she will be prosecuted, judged and the sentence is "Honor killing". If he really loves this American girlfriend he will apply the same rules and traditions that he will apply for his sister. That lead us to the real motive of Abdullah which is just to travel and live in USA and once he gets that he will throw away his " sweetheart" in a heart beat.
3. I think this case indicates that the struggle between the West and the East has extended and contaminated even the emotional and personal relations such as love. Some US citizens will look at this case as if they are losing a round with the East since the reaction will not be that strong if Abdullah is " John or Peter" and is living in Europe. Also Abdullah family want to score against USA by doing the impossible to have this US girl in a relationship/marriage with their son.

We've already been through this.  Seven years ago, our oldest daughter met an Iranian online and carried on a relationship with him secretly.  He was married with two small children.  Five years ago, he was finally divorced, sent his ex-wife back to her parents and kept the children.  Our daughter flew to Turkey and married him, but promised us she wouldn't go over there to live, that they were trying to get him into Canada.  Well, it was all a lie.  Five months after my mother died, she came to us and told me that she had always hated me and that I had never done anything but ruin her life.  In Oct. 2004, she got on a plane and flew off to be with him in Iran, but not before she came to us and told me that she had always hated me and that I had never done anything but ruin her life.  She was over 21, and there was nothing we could do. So, who lost out in all of this? The little boy she left behind, our grandson, who we adopted and are now raising as our own.  He understands that his father walked away when he was a baby (and hasn't seen him since), but he doesn't understand how his mother could abandon him and go raise someone else's kids. Neither do we. The little girl we raised, who could have been anything she wanted to be, is as good as dead and gone, lost to us forever.  She selfishly chose her own "happiness" over her son. Thankfully, she can't have anymore children, and I suppose that when she does eventually die, her no good significant other won't bother to tell us.  We lost all patience and tolerance in this situation a long time ago.  As much as we might pity any girl who would stupidly put herself into such a despicable situation, our heart goes out the family who is left behind to worry and grieve.