I don't feel that it is fair to say that because you are "desperate" for a child, you shouldn't have one. People who have never had trouble conceiving have no idea how it feels to not be able to. It does make you feel desperate. In my case, I knew that I had a limited window of time after having a laparoscopic surgery to remove adhesions from endometriosis. Endometriosis is fueled by the same hormones that cause menstruation. So the endometriosis outside my uterus reacts the same way as my endometrial lining...it thickens and sheds bleeding internally causing severe pain at various times of the month. I have some kind of pelvic pain nearly everyday. It cause urinary and bowel pain. Sometimes afte urination I curl up in a ball crying in pain. It is hard not to feel some desperation when you know that with every passing month you don't conceive, conception becomes less likely. My tubes were crimped and twisted. My bowels, bladder, and all other pelvic organs had adhesions. That was over a year ago...I am still not pregnant and the pain is back with a vengeance. So yes I am desperate in a way that a woman who does not have to deal with such a life altering condition could not ever be or understand. If I get pregnant, not only does my pain go away but I will have what I have been dreaming of my whole life. I can finally give my husband a child and with clear conscience have a hysterectomy and live pain free...that is if I don't have another condition that is causing my urinary pain which is very likely.
I get down and depressed about my situation but I thank god every day for my life and my supportive husband. I think thank god that I haven't conceived just to miscarriage. Not conceiving at all is better than that. We have done consults. I have had too many ultrasounds to list. We have discussed IUI, IVF, adoption, and medications. I did a year of charting my ovulation and trying to conceive before ever visiting the doctor and when I found out what was wrong it hit me like a ton of bricks. My life changed forever. Finally I had a reason why I was in so much pain. I always thought it was normal to feel pelvic pain everyday. I thought it was normal to spend days in bed in pain. After the surgery we did three months of infertility meds that made me feel pregnant...tell me that doesn't suck. Followed by ultrasounds and fertility shots...no baby. After three months, I was weak...I couldn't do it anymore. I needed time off. I spent a year in total depression before picking myself back up again. I had to shift my focus so I began online classes giving up the dream of having my own child...but it was there in the back of my mind as I choose a career that would allow me to be a stay at home mom. Now the pain is worse with new symptoms and here I am again pondering what is right.
Do I try birth control again that makes me too emotionally to function and at the same time keeps me from getting what I want? Do I take drugs with terrible side affects that put me in drug-induced menopause? Do I try alternate therapies? Do I give up and have a hysterectomy? All these are questions that I once again face as I prepare for another consult with a third doctor, one year and six months after my initial diagnosis....after 5 years of marriage...five years of unprotected intercourse with my husband.
Hi, my name is Molly. I am 27 years old. I have endometriosis and I am infertile. And you better believe that makes for one desperate woman without much hope left.
How far would you go to be a mother? Dr. Phil's guests are women whose biological clocks are ticking time bombs, and they're willing to risk almost everything to become pregnant. When Tonya and Keith got married, they agreed not to have children. Six years later, Tonya has had a change of heart and is now obsessed with having a baby, but Keith is totally opposed to the idea. Can they reach a compromise without resenting each other, or will the baby talk end their wedded bliss? Next, Eric and Michelle have been married over a year and have been unable to conceive. Eric refuses to spend another dime on fertility treatments because he says there's no guarantee she's going to get pregnant. Michelle won't take no for an answer and has even considered going behind her husband's back and charging fertility treatments on her credit card. After talking with Dr. Phil, will Eric decide to invest in the procedures, or will Michelle put her baby dreams on hold? And, Dr. Phil fitness expert, Robert Reames, and his wife, Arminae, share their painful five-year struggle to have another baby. Talk about the show here.
