Topic : 12/06 Desperate to Be a Mom

When my husband and I met  I was 32 he was 30 divrced with a daughter and I had no children and didn't want any children!!! we agreed that we wouldn't have any children today.  About a year after we met I decided that I did want a baby after all.  Fortunately my husband open to the idea, HOWEVER it was discovered that I also have PCOS so it took me several months to concieve.

If my husband had said no he didn't want a child I would have had to abide by his decision becuause that was the deal I made going in

I think this is a good opportunity for anyone who wants to join a group of women who have experienced infertility and have overcome it, or women who are currently experiencing this.  It's always easier to discuss your infertilty with others who have experienced it or are currently experiencing it. If you would like to join a group, email me at mattandstacydietz@woh.rr.com

I'd love to be there for anyone who needs someone to talk to...been there done that...   

You don't think its selfish to make a deal with your spouse before marriage to only change your mind later and expect him to change his? You're the type of woman that guys with half a brain avoid. You can't comprimise on having a child, in a situation where one person wants one and the other doesn't. What Dr. Phil is suggesting is that he should sacrafice his happiness for hers. Thats wrong. She made the deal, if she's changed her mind then she needs to get a divorce, not try to emotional blackmail her husband. Truthfully, she probably always wanted a kid and knew it would be harder for him to run after marriage. Its the old bait and switch. Show you one thing, give you another.

And if marriage is a two way street and a comprimise, what is she giving up in this situation? What does he have to gain besides unhappiness?

You reason like a 16 year old girl. News flash, babies cost money. Families cost money. Living costs money. People need food, water, and shelter...not babies. Learn to differentiate between needs and wants.

I was 28 when I began dating my then 56 year old husband.  I never would have purposesly got into this May/December romance but we started off as good friends and ended up soul mates.  We've now been together 27 years and have a 21 year old son.

We went into the marriage not planning to have children.  I had occluded tubes and rarely had a period.  Lo and behold at 34 years of age I had the surprise of our lives and we were soon to become parents of a bouncing baby boy.  At age 62 my husband became a father for the seventh time, my son's oldest brother being 39 years older. <G>

My son kept my husband young.  For the first time he was in the delivery room to see one of his children born.  He was home more to help raise him.  He even recieved his high school diploma (thanks to veteans getting dipolmas after having quit high school to go to war) in the same ceremony my son recieved his.  It was so heartwarming to see my son step out and hug his dad after  my husband got his diploma.  My husband was 81 and my son was 18.

Today my son still lives at home and works a full time job as a deisel mechanic.  When he is home my husband and son work on their two classic 1966 Mustangs and their Bronco 4x4.  They both enjoy doing work around our little horse farm and on weekends are usually found shopping together for car parts at local auto stores and junk yards. 

I could never imagine life without my "boys"! 

Marian

I agree with this. 100%

You cannot be serious? You and Robin already had a child, your situation was 100% different. You were not opposed to children, you had one already, you knew what you were getting into. Double shame on Dr. Phil for suggesting this man suck it up and have a kid....why double shame?

Because!!! You of all people are actually suggesting that somebody who doesn't want a child to bring one into the world anyway?  Isn't this the opposite of what you stand for?....Deliberately dragging innocent children into bitter situations??

You are only assuming this man would not regret having a kid after he sees how wonderful it is.....AND WHAT HAPPENS WHEN HE REGRETS IT???  This poor [unwanted] child. Who pays the price??

Children are the victims, Dr. Phil of all people....I am shocked that you would suggest such a thing!

Actually Triple shame on you!!! Why triple? Becuase now there are going to be millions of women who feel that they are entitled to guilting their husband into having babies...."because Dr. Phil would!"

....and you know if women want kids so bad they should be with a man who wants kids too! Millions of couples had BIG fights the night this show aired!

Shame shame shame :(

If you cannot get pregnant naturally without all the fertility stuff ....then maybe you should see it as a sign from above.

Maybe it was in God's plan for you to not concieve. Considering adoption seems the more natural thing to do then tampering with nature.