Message Boards

Topic : 12/19 Parents’ Ultimate Test: Dealing with Autism

Number of Replies: 290
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Thursday, December 13, 2007, 05:12:39 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
The ultimate test for any parent is loving a child who is difficult, sometimes frightening, to the whole family. It’s a test parents of autistic children are put to daily. Ten-year-old Luz throws screaming tantrums, barks like a dog, and tells his mother, Sara, that he plans to kill her. Sara has long felt despair at Luz’s out-of-control behavior, yet she was shocked when a doctor diagnosed him with autism. Go inside the daily life of this family, see Luz’s wild behavior caught on tape, and learn why Sara’s main coping mechanisms might be putting her at risk. Then, a member of Dr. Phil’s own staff achieved miraculous results for her autistic child and her whole family through an intense program. Could a similar treatment work for Luz? Plus, what causes autism? Several recent media reports and high-profile parents such as Jenny McCarthy have pointed the finger at vaccinations. Is there a link? Child care expert and pediatrician Dr. Jim Sears weighs in. Then, imagine having a crime committed against you, but not having a voice or any way to tell someone you’d been wronged. Some mothers in Las Vegas say that’s exactly what happened when a teacher allegedly abused their autistic children, and they’ve filed a lawsuit. Hear them recount the painful details of the alleged abuse. What are their chances of winning in court? Share your thoughts here.

Find out what happened on the show.

As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

December 19, 2007, 7:30 am CST

Dr. Phil should do a multi-part series on Autism

Even though I didn't watch the program "Parents' Ultimate Test: Dealing With Autism" yet, I believe its going to educate the general public parents with Autism go through in raising their Autistic children on a regular basis.

 

However, its sad that Dr. Phil doesn't have a multi-part series on this subject, not one part.  Some series should reflect struggles and challenges Autistic adults experience in achieving full participation in society, proper Autism resources for parents instead of learning about this disability through "Hollywood" negative stereotypes, getting Autistic children to participate in their community, proper education and skills training, etc.

 

I also feel adults living with the actual disability, particularly myself, should participate in future Dr. Phil shows on Autism as well so they can discuss their experiences and challenges living with this disability.  From my experiences living with this disability, the best experts on Autism are not Psychologists and Psychiatrists, not meant to offend Dr. Phil and his hard work on this subject, but actualy Autism sufferers.

 

Dr. Phil should also have a Public Speakers bureau where individuals living with Autism overcoming great odds can talk about their experience to the general public, which hopefully eliminate any negative perceptions and stereotypes about this disability. 

 

That way, people will think twice before relying on Hollywood to learn about this disability, and  force them to learn the true facts about it.

 

In the meantime, Dr. Phil should have more Autism related topics on future shows, focusing on Autistic Children and Adults, and have actual sufferers participate.  I'm willing to do so.

 
December 19, 2007, 8:08 am CST

School

The abuse happens more than people think.  My daughter has Rett which is a form of Austim that is caused my a mutation on her genes.  She came homedeli from middle school with a broken arm.  The last straw is when she came home from high school covered with brusies.   I reported the abuse to childern services and they invested me!  

Now she sits home all day at the age of 29 because our county board of mr/dd cannot or will not provide her with a safe, engaing program.

Judy
 
December 19, 2007, 8:29 am CST

12/19 Parents’ Ultimate Test: Dealing with Autism

I am curious why they only seem to pull out the kids who seem to be functioningthe worst with autism. I feel for this family as it doesnt look like they have had a lot of help or support from local therapists or the schools. Behavioral intervention can really help in this instance. Autism is a spectrum disorder and has many manifestations. To show only the worst of the worst is a diservice for ALL parents dealing with autism.

 

My 4 yr old has high functioning autism and without Early Intervention I dont know where we would be. Do I think there is a cure for autism no there is not.  I felt that was a misnomer for you to claim 10% of kids can be cured. How do you cure something if you dont know what causes it. I was impressed that you admit while it hasnt been proven vaccines cause autism it also hasnt been disproved. Thank you for that fact.

 

Please update us on this family as time goes on. If they havent they need to reach out to their local Autism Society and Autism Support Programs for help. I hope the group form Minnesota can really help them out. Its hard when it seems mom is doing all the work at home and dad has a job where he is gone 80 hrs a week.

 
December 19, 2007, 8:38 am CST

Autism

I have a 21 year old autistic son and have thanked God for such a beautiful gift, for me being chosen. I am not saying there were not times of hopelessness and despair while seeking professional help.  In the mean time, I starting realizing people, places, decor, lighting, food would over stimulate and escalate the outrageous behaviors.  There censors & tactile are violated to the extreme of being in shear pain. At no time did I ever give him the power to run my home, I would lay across him to decompress him while applying presser to his shoulders.........this would allow him to cry something they need to be taught.  Basically, an autistic child/adult can be taught to love, cry, laugh, it is a matter of taking time to teach these children every step of a normal life.  Divorce becomes a high rate, as the mother fights for her child and the father becomes lost and confused.  My son, graduated in 2005 from a High School adaption, uses the public transit system, works full-time at a dental lab, handles his own bank account, pays bills and my next step is get him into his own place.  All theses steps took a lot of time and the help from our Autism Resource Center.  Have goals and expectations for your child and together you'll achieve.  People loss sight of this and teach the disability.

 

Marlene (Canada)

 

 

 
December 19, 2007, 9:51 am CST

My Brother Has Autism too

Quote From: princess1

I have a 40 year old brother who is autistic.  The dissappointments and embarrassments are something I lived daily growing up.  It is very emotionally draining to have any special needs child, but I think autistic children are even more of a drain because a lot of times their disability is not as outward evident, especially if, like my brother, they are high functioning.  He has some amazing skills, such as at age 3 he could spell any word in the dictionary; and if you give him any date in the last 500 years he can tell you what day of the week it fell on.  While parents of autistic children need extra support there is a forgotten group; the siblings.  I know my parents did the best they could with the situation they had, but my word of advice to parents who have autistic or any special needs children is please don't forget your other children.  They may not need the level of attention as your special needs child, but that does not mean they don't need you.  Even if it is just 5 minutes a day, make sure you put aside that time for the non special needs childern, time that is just for them.  It will help with resentment issues, and bring you closer as a family, which is good for everyone involved.  God bless the parents and siblings of all special needs childrens.
:) I hear you! I was fortunate growing up. I feel like I got a decent amount of attention. And my mom involved me in a lot of things my little brother was doing so she could give us both attention at the same time. I see a lot of parents who don't (or can't) give the other siblings the amount of attention they need and deserve. It is so tough because I know that parents know that they are not giving enough attention, and I am sure that they feel horrible about it, but there are only so many hours in the day.
My only advice would be for them to maybe include the sibling in things the child with Autism is doing, and encourage them to network with support groups. A lot of therapy centers for children with disabilities have sibling workshops, and I hear that they are a GREAT resource.
Lastly, to the person who posted this. You are not alone, I hope you know that. :)
 
December 19, 2007, 9:57 am CST

12/19 Parents’ Ultimate Test: Dealing with Autism

Quote From: moogie1955

I have a 21 year old autistic son and have thanked God for such a beautiful gift, for me being chosen. I am not saying there were not times of hopelessness and despair while seeking professional help.  In the mean time, I starting realizing people, places, decor, lighting, food would over stimulate and escalate the outrageous behaviors.  There censors & tactile are violated to the extreme of being in shear pain. At no time did I ever give him the power to run my home, I would lay across him to decompress him while applying presser to his shoulders.........this would allow him to cry something they need to be taught.  Basically, an autistic child/adult can be taught to love, cry, laugh, it is a matter of taking time to teach these children every step of a normal life.  Divorce becomes a high rate, as the mother fights for her child and the father becomes lost and confused.  My son, graduated in 2005 from a High School adaption, uses the public transit system, works full-time at a dental lab, handles his own bank account, pays bills and my next step is get him into his own place.  All theses steps took a lot of time and the help from our Autism Resource Center.  Have goals and expectations for your child and together you'll achieve.  People loss sight of this and teach the disability.

 

Marlene (Canada)

 

 

I am so happy to hear about your son, he sounds quite successful, and I wish him nothing but success in the future.

I know that your post was written with good intentions, however, you must be careful when using blanketing statements and examples of your son in describing autism. It is unfair to say "an autistic child/adult can be taught to love, cry, laugh, it is a matter of taking time to teach these children every step of a normal life." As the mother of a person with Autism, you should know that Autism is a spectrum disorder, and for those on one end of the spectrum, teaching those things is not necessarily possible.
I am not trying to make you feel bad, I'm just asking you to please be sensitive because there are lots of people out there reading these boards, who may have a child who is not doing well. For that person, reading what you wrote might make them feel like a failure because their child is severely affected by the disorder and they have not been able to "teach them to love" although they have spent a lot of time and energy trying.

 
December 19, 2007, 11:28 am CST

Autism,pecs and the Vantage plus,,,,,,,,

I am a Mother of two boys one who is now five and one who is 18mths I just wanted to speak out with the rest of the world agains Autism  my five year old son Ryley has Autism and we have been in and out of treatments and had many rough days nights and weeks!! I just really want to say that as a parent here are the hardest things with Autism I have had to deal with!! first lets start with the Doctors having no concern of anything wrong with my child but yet the age milestones on the check up list did not match to my sons age, My son than not responding to his name so they believed it to be related to ear infections, I really want to stress how important it is for parents who know there child best SPEAK out and p[rotect these children because believe me noone else will!!! Insurance companies have no concern to help with any treatments, or equipment that may or may not better the out come of life for these kids!! How unfair to be labeled with no help.. I also agree it is related to shots, I also had a child who was speaking and that it just stopped...All you can do is get early interventions and work hard with your child my son also has used PECS for any parent who has not heard of it or even been offered it it is a Picture exchange system that worked and still works very well with my child we have words and even sentences now!!! also we are starting a new device called the vantage plus another form of language for my child it is a voice generating device I recommend all parent s to try these items it may or may not work!!! but it is worth the try and it has worked for us!! Good luck to everyone who has been given the biggest test of all!!! please anyone feel free to contact me re: the devices we have used I would love to help anyone in the direction to help!!  
 
December 19, 2007, 12:03 pm CST

There is hope

My youngest son was diagnosed with autism in grade school. 

 

He is now 27 and can function for the most part on his own.  He does need supervision to remember to do things. He communicates with people he knows with conversations.  He is a quiet man has no initiative, but will interact when asked to.  He jokes with people. 

 

Working to improve their lives is rewarding, but I caution you not to neglect your other children.  My son's brothers and sisters were a big help to him,

 

 

 
December 19, 2007, 12:09 pm CST

12/19 Parents’ Ultimate Test: Dealing with Autism

Many of the autistic children on today's show look like kids with the type of autism that is caused by Fetal Alcohol Syndrome.  Their facial features and their behaviors are indicitive of FAS and the current literature cites maternal alcohol use as the cause of some forms of Autism.  Once again, Dr. Phil does not warn the public about the dangers of moderate drinking in pregnancy.
 
December 19, 2007, 12:19 pm CST

I feel for this family

I have a daughter who is on the severe end of the spectrum.  She was at one time almost as violent as her son.  She never went for knives and is non-verbal, but she would have violent rages for 2 hours at a time.  We ended up putting her on medication.  For the most part she does not have rages at all.  She is in a terrific school district that is actually willing to spend money on special education.  We really want to try a biomedical approach, but do not have the money because insurance will not cover that.

Doctors are not willing to try and find the cause of Autism.  They are only concerned with treating symptoms.  This needs to change.
 
First | Prev | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Next | Last