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Topic : 01/07 Don't Be That Girl

Number of Replies: 370
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Created on : Friday, January 04, 2008, 02:06:39 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Are you still looking for Mr. Right? Are you a catch, but can’t figure out why you haven’t been swept off your feet yet? Do you find yourself wondering what you’re doing wrong? Maybe it’s because you’re that girl! Dr. Travis Stork dated 25 women all at once on the hit reality show, The Bachelor: Paris. He says because of the experience, he has a knack for distinguishing what’s endearing in women and what’s not. He used his dating expertise to write a book called, Don’t Be That Girl: A Guide to Finding the Confident, Rational Girl Within. He explains the eight types of women he’s encountered and passed by: The Agenda Girl, the Yes Girl, the Drama Queen Girl, the Bitter Girl, the Insecure Girl, the Desperate Girl, the Working Girl and the Lost Girl. Meet five women who wonder if they’re that girl. Katrina, Rebecca, Demetrice, Jennifer H. and Jennifer R. want to figure out what they’re doing wrong when it comes to finding love. Are you making the same mistakes? Talk about the show here.

Find out what happened on the show.

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January 5, 2008, 9:06 pm CST

Try joining special interest groups...

Quote From: fullofsunshine

This topic seems to fit me to a tee...everyday thats all I hear is how good of a person I am, what a great partner I would make someone..but yet after 3 years of being separated(now divorced) I am still single and hating it...It seems all the men that I find are either married or in a relationship or they are liars or they are going through a separation and have to much on their plate..how can a 39yr old find love again???
Do a self-study of your interest, make a list of fun things that interest you: photography, sports, CHURCH, music, movies, pets, scrapbooking or cooking for example.  Then join groups in your area where you can meet people with similar interest.  Wrong place to meet the perfect person would be the local bar, that is off limits if you are looking for a serious relationship, or a nightclub for that same matter of fact. 
 
January 5, 2008, 9:13 pm CST

Britney Spears could have used this show!!!

She keeps on failing --  at finding Mr. Right.  Talk about frustrations, she is at her ends whits right now.  It all boils down to picking the WRONG person for the WRONG reasons.  Once you do that, it is just a spiral downward effect. 

 

I praise Dr. Phil for wanting to help Britney, very sorry for her to turn away one of the BEST helpers she could have had.  It is difficult to try to help people that refuse to try to help themselves, but then that is the vicious circle; if she could help herself she would not be in the predicament she is in right now. 

 
January 6, 2008, 4:56 am CST

01/07 Don't Be That Girl

Quote From: fullofsunshine

This topic seems to fit me to a tee...everyday thats all I hear is how good of a person I am, what a great partner I would make someone..but yet after 3 years of being separated(now divorced) I am still single and hating it...It seems all the men that I find are either married or in a relationship or they are liars or they are going through a separation and have to much on their plate..how can a 39yr old find love again???
I can relate to you i am a man and been divorced for 4 years and find that every woman i find is married or seeing some one,or they think we (men) want one thing ,well this man dont i want some one that will be my friend, and a good listener and comunicator.
 
January 6, 2008, 5:29 am CST

This is stupid!

I go over to the he/she won't commit board often ( and it is a lot more "he won't commit " than "she"), and I see woman after woman afraid to leave some idiot that has been holding her up and giving her the song and dance for 4,5,6,7,8 years while her youth and life slip away.

 

Why can't we women say "I won't continue to see you unless you straighten up!"

 

THEN Dr. Phil can do a show for the poor lost men eager to change THEMSELVES so a woman will take THEM on.

 

Will that ever happen?  Or will women continue to beg and plead and "fix" themselves to hold onto some relationship while the man does whatever he wants.

 

I was at an internet dating service yesterday and one of my matches was a handsome ex soilder.  I GAVE HIM THE BOOT because his top priority was that his match not be overweight..   He is probably trying figure our how someone could turn him down.

 

It hurt to do this, believe me! The pickings are slim.  But it is better than being in a position where I have to try to change myself to get someone to like me.  Relationships are a two way street and no one is perfect.

 

 

 
January 6, 2008, 6:25 am CST

Lord, it's hard to be humble

    when you are perfect in every way.

    I can't wait to look in the mirror

    'cause I get better looking

    each day.

    Some folks tell me I'm egotistical

    and I don't even know

    what that means.

     I guess it has something to do with the way

     that I fill out my skin tight blue jeans.

 

     Oh yes, I have had the displeasure of watching The Bachelor.  It is a show empathizing a feminine competition for the perfect man. The producers even drag the bachelor's family into it.  And, he asks for his mother's help choosing that ideal girl for him to propose to at the end of the show.  The "poor boy" whines about his plight. 

     And now, he has the audacity to promote his book. 

     He had his own agenda, also.    

 

   

 
January 6, 2008, 12:03 pm CST

OMG! Don't, I beg ya!

Good God!  Please, society ...STOP!  Stop trying to put "people" into neat boxes and labelling them!  Everyone is so "different" and to PUT A LABEL never EVER works!  Look at me, OR DON'T ...totally whatever!  My point is not gonn'a sit with some, and might totally speak to "others" ....THAT'S MY DARN POINT!  Sheesh Already!  "THAT GIRL?" WHAT?!!!??  Get OUT!  I'm an "individual" and EACH OF US "us" have had TOTALLY UNIQUE life experiences...and stuff happen...DON'T BOX ME!!!  makes me ANGRY!

 

Oh!  might wann'a keep in mind, I have BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) so....ummmmmYA!  I "FEEL" my anger !!!!  OH YES!  and this whole "LABEL CRAP!" can and does....TOTALLY BLOW!

 

Okay, I'm over it now...so?  I am single! hehehe, any guys out there wann'a have a tea with ME? heheheeeeeeeee....OMG!  funny!  What-EVER! Teehee!~

 
January 6, 2008, 12:23 pm CST

Just the facts, 'mam.

Quote From: billiegray

What I like best about  Dr. Phil is that his "experts" don't pound the table. They just say,"this is what I see, and this may work better." I am a New York divorce lawyer, and daily I talk with people who want ideas about what they may be dong wrong, and what may work better. Labeling and judgment are an unfortunate fact of life. But some amount of generalizing is necessary. if we can't gather a set of human traits and give them a name and discuss what may work badly for them or may work well,  there could be no field of psychology - or a number of others. I hope Dr. Stork offers something of value to me, and that I can pass along to my divorce clients.

   

     Why would you advise them about what they are doing wrong in their marriages?  If you are their divorce lawyer, be their divorce lawyer.  Sticking with the facts is hard enough when she is so emotionally involved.  If she needs a professional therapist, tell her.  (You are working for a lot more money an hour than any therapist.  She is wasting her money spilling her guts out to you)

 
January 6, 2008, 2:31 pm CST

Doctor?

Quote From: thetexasgal

What do you mean you can't believe it... he is a doctor!  Can't Dr. Phil have a fellow collegue on the show?  Uh, YES!  He is single, he is a medical doctor... please - if actors can write books, um, I'm thinking this isn't so much of a stretch.  Dr. Stork - you're a stud!
I am a doctor, too. What entitlement does that give me, exactly?
 
January 6, 2008, 2:39 pm CST

Don't be that girl! Be the Woman of Wisdom!

 

Mr. Perfect has missed a very important category of woman!  The Woman of Wisdom!

 

He didn't even categorize her in his list of possibilities. I suspect he went fishing with the wrong bait -lol. Looks like he's not so smart after all! 

 

The woman of wisdom looks for unconditional love in a man because that is the glue that holds a relationship together "long term".

 

No she won't shun good looks, money or status, but she knows most men have problems sharing "their" money, which means they are too cheep to provide for their bride! This is simple truth!

 

Just ask Dr. Phil - lol.

 
January 6, 2008, 8:42 pm CST

01/07 Don't Be That Girl

Quote From: derevna33

    when you are perfect in every way.

    I can't wait to look in the mirror

    'cause I get better looking

    each day.

    Some folks tell me I'm egotistical

    and I don't even know

    what that means.

     I guess it has something to do with the way

     that I fill out my skin tight blue jeans.

 

     Oh yes, I have had the displeasure of watching The Bachelor.  It is a show empathizing a feminine competition for the perfect man. The producers even drag the bachelor's family into it.  And, he asks for his mother's help choosing that ideal girl for him to propose to at the end of the show.  The "poor boy" whines about his plight. 

     And now, he has the audacity to promote his book. 

     He had his own agenda, also.    

 

   

I watched two episodes and lost interest. What I don't understand is how women would put themselves in a situation where they are throwing themselves at one guy. All at once. I guess I don't understand the competitive drive over it.

 

And then what happens after the show? Is the girl he's chosen really the one he'll spend the rest of his life with? Isn't that a risk, considering she's just thrown all her eggs into one basket? This isn't a black and white classic movie where two people meet and get married under and hour and half, is it?

 

Don't people behave different on a show than they do in real life? I mean, after he goes home, crawls into his comfort zone - what about the other girls? The ones who've declared their love for him, yet not been given the rose?

 

I agree with you ... 'plight' indeed.

 
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