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Topic : 01/15 Internet Mistakes

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Created on : Friday, January 11, 2008, 01:03:06 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Girls dancing on bars half-naked, passed out on the beach, hugging the porcelain … these are photos posted for all to see on the Web site Facebook, in a group called Thirty Reasons a Girl Should Call it a Night. These shocking and provocative pictures are supposedly submitted by the women in the photos themselves. The women say they love to have fun, and this is a way to bond with other girls just like them. But are there unforeseen consequences to letting the public behold you at your worst? Dr. Phil speaks with women on both sides of this debate. Jasmine is the moderator for the group Thirty Reasons and says, although she’s responsible for taking down questionable photos, she hasn’t found one yet! Amanda and Norma are incensed that women would degrade themselves in this way. Hear from the president of a company who uses Web sites like Facebook and MySpace to weed out potential employees. Could documenting your good time on the Internet become your biggest regret? Then, a teen who loves to drink says criticism of Thirty Reasons just reinforces the double standard of gender inequality. What do Dr. Phil and the teen’s mother think? Plus, a mayor’s sexy photo has her town’s residents outraged. And, meet a substitute teacher who says he was unfairly fired from his job two times for what’s on his MySpace page. Share your thoughts here.

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February 1, 2008, 3:03 pm CST

Teens having babies

 What is wrong with these girls and guys having sex without birth control?  Most states will give free birth control even without parents consent.  There is no reason for unwanted, unplanned pregnancies in this country today.  NO REASON!!!!!!!!!!  What is wrong with parents today?  Talk, talk, talk to your children about SEX.  It is your job as parents to talk to your kids about everything, if you don't want to talk to them then you should not have had them in the first place.  There are so many people in this country that should never, ever have children.  But if you do, you need to be responsible for them and that is the problem.  There are great parents out there and they never get the recognition they deserve.  I think that every school in the country should have mandatory classes where every student takes home the controlled baby for two weeks and have to take care of it.  Start out with junior high kids, since they are having sex.  Maybe this will make them think twice about having sex.  The 19 year old on your show today is an idiot, I have no sympathy for her.  Having sex without birth control, stupid, stupid.  I guess I have vented enough, thanks for listening.
 
February 10, 2008, 11:53 am CST

01/15 Internet Mistakes

 This whole thing made me laugh in so many ways. First of all the Face book page 30 reasons why a girl should call it quits the first 2 or 3 examples gave me enough inspiration to call it quits ahead of time. How funny it was to me that other girls could not get it. I am sure that they will in the future.

My other comment about this subject is that my high school year book embarrasses me. I have it hid way back in a closet and have never show-en it to my 22 year old kid. I also modeled for a photo for a hair cutting Solon when I was 9 or 10 and it is published in a news paper.  I won't be showing that photo anytime soon either. I think that photo's should sometimes embarrass you and should bring you back to where you came from. I don't think that everyone needs to go to extremes but some people have to in order to learn.

The whole photo thing will haunt you later and then you will have to get an attitude that says I am above that now. But till then live life, be young and grow up later. ( oh and no nudity, ok )

Melissa
 

 
March 2, 2008, 6:53 am CST

Mistake or Misunderstanding

 The internet is something to be thought of as a big eye and a big ear and a big world.  You should only post personal information at no time in my opinion but unfortunately that can be a negative thing if you intend to use  the computer and internet for personal use and gain.  How can you give someone a first impression when you are intending to attract someone?, be nice to know who that someone was because there are someones from every sprectum of life who have the potential to either destroy or enhance your own personal life should that idividual with that intent choose, dangerous thing allowing everyone into your life.  Steps can be taken to put yourself into the best position to attain the goals you seek, step back though and  try to look at it from someone elses point of view, if you feel comfortable with what you are conveying to the world, shouldn't be anything wrong with that just be aware of the possibilities.

rob :)
 
March 12, 2008, 7:51 pm CDT

SHOCKED!

This story just aired in Australia (13.03.08) and I was shocked at the outrage people had over petty drunken photos. In no way do I try and sound disrespectful or rude, I am simply stating my own person opinion on the topic. It may just be the fact I live in Australia where getting drunk is just a given for most of the country despite how old you are or how young (to a certain extent... obviously). I have been getting drunk at supervised parties since I was sixteen in safe situations that are supervised and moderated. I feel that if teenagers (legal age here is 18) drink (which most of us are going to do) then they may as well drink in a safe and supervised place. Taking photos of this should not be degrading at all, if anything it will discourage the drinker to get that heavily intoxicated in the future. I have a myspace and I used to have a facebook and in both I have had pictures of me drunk with my mates because that is a part of my life. I don't want to sacrifice putting up photos I like that remind me of good times (birthdays, weddings etc.) simply because I could get 'lurked' on myspace by future employers. -lurk; semi, internet stalking. If my future boss was to see me drunk on myspace I would be happy because at least I would know that s/he is viewing one aspect of my life, be that my fun/party side or be that the side of me that likes to hang out with friends, socialise. At least they know I'm not some anti-social psychopath. I guess what this debate may come down to is that within the Australian culture it is more acceptable to get drunk younger and more publically than within the US. Like I said before, it is not my intention to offend or look down upon the opinions and culture of others, so if it appears as if I am doing that I do apologise. And finally if I may, I want to talk about 'Ian' the substitute teacher with a myspace page. Like Dr. Phil said, there is nothing wrong with you expressing yourself via music, and there is nothing wrong with the conservative values of the particular school that fired you, it's just that both cannot work together. Ian, if you ever read this I would just like you to know that I think you should NEVER stop doing what you like to do, be that teaching and uploading your own personal music to a web page. America is a free country where people should be encouraged to achieve their goals and life ambitions! I say good luck to you and your music and teaching career. Students in middle school are a lot smarter than parents want to believe- I can, without a doubt in my mind tell you that each and every one of those kids who looked at Ian's myspace had heard the "F" word before. That is why I am shocked to hear he was fired for that. How are kids meant to grow up and be strong enough to face the world's prejudice and discrimination if they are taught that chasing your dreams and doing what you like to do is wrong, and they in fact might get punished for it. I will end on this; Stand up for yourself, live your life the way you want to live it and be happy with everything you achieve despite how small or great.

 

Paul. 18. Australia 

 
March 25, 2008, 9:16 pm CDT

Posting your future?

I watched Dr Phil, surprised to see that this episode addressed concerns regarding FaceBook and MySpace which is what I am currently studying this semester. So, in posting my thoughts i am linking study with a current and topical issue.

After watching the three sinarios on Mary, Ian and The mayor of Arlington, Oregon only one word really came to mind COMMON SENSE!

I listened to both views of the critics, creators (forums) and culprits of the stories and tended to agree and diasagree with all of them on some level.

The undeniable fact that we must accept is that, like or not, we live in an 'information world.'  With this has to come acceptance, flexibility, change, security and maturity. So, before CHOOSING to place yourself deeper into the cyberworld by setting up a FaceBook or MySpace page think firstly about your purpose for getting involved as well as understanding your security options and acknowledging that you are offering potentially EVERYONE information on your personal, social, creative or professional self.

 

I'll offer my opinion on Senerio 1 only : 17 year old, Mary.

 

Mary is young and binge drinking could be considered 'normal' behaviour for someone her age however it has also become a social concern, certainly in Australia, which is currently considering increasing the drinking age from 18 to 21 years, matching our American counterparts.  At Mary's age, drinking is a popular social bond, it's cool, daring, fun and NEW to them. Also, new to them is FaceBook or MySpace, which is also another avenue for social bonding, so logically they link the two, posting their social behaviour on the web.  As i mentioned before about what should be understood about the 'information world' is the need for MATURITY. This is what Mary hasn't yet understood or developed.... BUT,  hopefully since the DR Phil show she may think twice about her involvement with the forum " 30 reasons why a girl should call it a night."  Whether or not this behaviour is popular, 'normal'  and amusing to her, she needs to use COMMON SENSE and not post drunken photos on your site which are concerning. On the contrary to this statement, both  FLEXIBILTY AND ACCEPTANCE needs to be understood when some photos are posted. It should be acceptable to include social photos on your site using your DECRETION. Anyway, who wants an album with only  family portraits and family holidays. LIke many of us, Mary need to identify which photos are cyber safe friendly and which ones are not. I don't believe there is too much of a fine line involved, it should be relatively obvious to most. Lets look at the 3 senario's using COMMONSENSE.

 

Senario 1:  Includes you with one or two beers in one or both hands smiling and looking a little happy.

Not so cool, would be flashing yourself while holding one or two beer and looking happy. (if this is possible)

 

Senario 2: a group of friends looking a little drunk singing karoke together

Not so cool, would be a photo of your friends singing karoke while you are pashing the bar man.

 

Senario 3: Your friend is hugging you while you are about to have a shot of Tequila

Not so cool, Your friend is hugging the toilet bowl while you holding her hair back.

 

Pretty logical right!? Use your COMMON SENSE, YES we are all human and posting photos of our social life deserves to be kept separate from our professional life HOWEVER,  the potenial for them to interlink at at some point, in our favour or against is something to keep in mind before POSTING YOUR FUTURE.

 

Nataliex

 
April 4, 2008, 3:22 am CDT

stupid

I'm 17 years old my self, and when I saw the program about the girl at my age that put out pictures of herself drunk and all that stuff, i got suprised.! I can say that I have pictures of myself at the internet, but I would never put pictures on the internet where I were drunk, or allmost naked, like that girl had.. It's many people out in the world that can find you. And that can be very dangerous. Now in these technology-days, people can find out were you live, just by go on the internet, so I would be very careful...
 
June 4, 2008, 5:34 pm CDT

Equality vs. Inequality

Democracy is a concept in which we all have equal rights as human beings when in any kind of a legal relationship. The  Ph.D. is equal to the illiterate before the law. The president is equal to any citizen before the law.  There it ends. We dote on the president in office. Fight over candidates running for the office. We oggle the beauty at a pagent, and ignor the ugly deformed beggar. We praise the precocious scientific mind, but rant at the lazy game playing kid on his video. Family members are not equal before or behind the law. The in-law is not equal to the out-law. Children are illegitimate or legitimate, yet equal before the law. A criminal has all the human rights that the law abiding citizen has, but can be incarcerated for life or condemned to death for a crime he may not have committed. Legally he commited the crime he is punished for, even if he did not do it. And legally he is innocent before the trial, even if he did.

In Israel, Arabs and other non-Jews are not equal to Jewish citizens, but Israel is the '...only demcoracy...' in the Middle East. For most of my life Blacks, Mexicans, Jews, and atheists were treated with contempt by white, Christian, Americans. In many western democracies, such as United Stated, Canada, Britain, and Scandinavian countries, non-Europeans are not trusted. Muslims are not trusted in predominately Christian populations, and Christians and Jews are not trusted in predominately Muslim populations.

Boys are preferred in Asian and Muslim families. Polygamy is more prevalent than polyandry, though a female prostitute has multiple sex partners in any time frame. More men than women are elected or appointed to public office. In mid 20th century, most physicians were men, but most nurses were women. Roman Catholics require priests to be men, though there both nuns and monks. A tall man with a short woman is more 'normal' than a tall woman with a short man.  There are no midgets on the football team.




 
July 22, 2008, 6:12 pm CDT

Bosses that hire with limited thinking

Quote From: tiffany_2007

Okay can someone explain to me why other people believe its private to post on a public forum? Or why they think it should be thought as there personal lives? If you just got out of a job interview, and it was Friday night and you go to your local bar, get wasted and a make an ass out of yourself. And the whole time your future boss was there watching it, You may not get that call back. If its done it public its not that private. And posting on a public forum means its not private anymore. Its not like that naughty tape you and your boyfriend made and no one else has ever seen it, thats private and very personal. But if you are a idiot and post it for the world to see, don't be shocked when your judged for that.

 

I have both myspace and facebook. They are both set to private as well, you have to actually be on my list of friends to see any of my photos, I do that cause I have a ton of photos of my son doing silly things, and I don't really want anyone to just seem them. I one time with a girl friend got waste and we thought we were so sexy and we got the camera out. When i loaded up the photos the next day, and laughed with my friend about it, we hit the delete button and they were never viewed again. It was so far from sexy, it was just sad. never a good idea to have a video camera or a digital camera around when your wasted.

 Well, in today's world, bosses no longer have as much option to hire based on a person's private follies.  Sometimes, if they want the most accomplished or desirable employee, one who has top rate skills, then they have to deal with outside personalities.  I think a great show that demonstrates this is CSI, where the girl with the alternative lifestyle and look happens to be the best forensic scientist and in demand, so they hire her even with the differences.  That's creative thinking and what spurs success in industry.

This idea that we have to prostitute ourselves for our employers is archaic.  If you are a competent employee with an abundance of offerings, then your private life should be inconsequential.  And for many employers, like mine, that happens to be the case.  People shouldn't subject themselves to any other type of employer on a long term basis.  If they are that superficial, use them and move on when you find an employer with a more stellar approach.  If everyone did this, employers would change their tune very quickly!  People have to believe in themselves!
 
August 7, 2008, 10:39 am CDT

Just seen the show

I just saw this show on Dutch TV,  I  been  on the internet since my 13th already and have seen a lot of things.  I been  moderator, operator, administrator, head admin, co-owner and currently owner of a chat site. I have a lot of experience if it comes to internet communities, I do actually not want to say or imply that i'm a pro or anything. I just say I have experience, period. Okay, now to the topic.

Since it's about doing stupid things on the internet I can be very clear on it. Yes, there are a lot of people that actually don't think before posting anything. Video's, pictures, sounds based things and more. A lot choose to do tricks that fail horrably or choose to show them selfs getting drunk or using drugs. It might seem funny at that moment but I agree in this age we living in it is a horrible mistake. I can't say I always do the right thing, it's only human to make mistakes. Only thing you really can do is think about what you doing and what it might do for short term and long term. Is it really that good to have fun if you get in trouble later on in your life? I believe it is not a good thing. Specially for teens that already are out of control or having problems. I know a lot that did simular things and ended up really bad. So please people, I mean all people from all ages, think before you post things!

I do not say anything about not taping it, if you want, please do and have fun. Just make sure it doesn't get posted on the internet and/or on any other way getting public. It will end up hurting you eventually even though you personally don't see a problem with it. I believe people should make fun but I do also believe people should not make their "fun" public and tell others they should not tell them they are wrong in any way or even hear they are messing with their own futures.

I do have a feeling, sorry to say this, that people with the english language as first language and specially people from the US are the most likely to do such things. It is a finding that I found over the years of experience on the internet, also my findings are that when ever you try to help out for the better that this is not apriciated at all, again the US people seem to be having a headstart on this unfortunatly.
 
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