Topic : 03/27 "Get Your Act Together!"

Number of Replies: 231
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Created on : Friday, January 11, 2008, 01:06:43 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 01/17/07) Most kids dream of growing up and moving away from home, but what happens when your adult children still haven’t flown the coop? Amanda, her husband, Mike, and their baby are all living in her parents’ tiny three-bedroom apartment. Amanda’s sister, Heather, says Mike and Amanda are so disrespectful to her mom, Brenda, and stepdad, Mike, that they need to be kicked to the curb! Heather says Amanda is lazy, and Mike lost his job as a correctional officer when he was convicted of selling drugs to the inmates! Brenda says she can’t bear the thought of her daughter and grandchild living on the street. Can Dr. Phil get her to cut the purse strings? Then, Brianne has been with her boyfriend, Greg, for nine years and says he’s the biggest mooch she’s ever met. Greg has never paid rent and admits he’s had between 50 and 75 jobs in the last six years. Brianne’s Aunt Terri says Greg is a lazy loser, and she’s sick of his excuses. Will Greg be able to get on his feet, or should Brianne cut her losses and move on?  Tell us what you think.

Find out what happened on the show.


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March 28, 2008, 3:29 pm PDT

Time to grow up

 I'm a hispanic female, so I already have 2 strikes against me in the working world.  However, I've managed to put myself through college.   I currently work 3 jobs- 1 full time and 2 part time jobs, so that I can keep a roof over my head, food in my stomach, and clothes on my back.

 

Yet, these 2 white males, find it  beneath them to flip burgers or to ride a bus in order to get to work.  The one  male thinks that smuggling drugs into prison was not too degrading, but that  working for  minimum wage is.

 

As for the other man,  he excuse for not working is that he has ADHD.  Please stop blaming a learning disability as an excuse for your laziness and mooching off of other people.  ADHD does not stop people from getting a job!!

 
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March 28, 2008, 3:29 pm PDT

Much ado about a freezer

Quote From: babsmom3

Do you work, do you have an income, do you do anything else beside care for your parents and complain? You say you would not want to see your parents in an assisted living situation or in a nursing home, so then why are you complaining about defrosting a freezer? Goodness lady, get it together, they are your parents. if the freezer needs defrosted, do it. How hard is that? Unplug the stupid thing, clean it out and move on. Oh my, what a hard days work.

 

    

 
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March 28, 2008, 4:23 pm PDT

How some people can find the time . . .

Quote From: babsmom3

I have read many of the comments about this show that aired.  One that really got to me is from a woman that is caring for her parents and is 53 years old and whining about defrosting the freezer.

Listen lady, be thankful you still have parents.  I moved from TX to OH in 1995 when I could tell that my Mother's health was starting to fail.  I gave up my entire life in order to move to OH to care for my Mother. My daughter was getting ready to start high school and I wanted her to attend her full 4 years of school in one place, not moving from state to state. So the solution, move.

My Mother's health started getting really bad when my daughter was still in high school. Between driving to and from work everyday, a 1-1/2 drive each way (we lived in the country and it was definitely a long commute), going to my Mother's apartment in the city where I worked, to clean, do her laundry, get her groceries, take her to and from the doctors, specialists, emergency hospital visits and stays, etc., I was worn out. This did not include my responsibilities I had at my own home and trying to stay involved in everything my daughter was involved in at school, youth group, upcoming college visits, etc. You name it, I did it. I didn't care how much work it was, how tired I was, I managed. And believe me, I was no spring chicken.

I sent my daughter off to college at 17 years old in the summer of 1999. Finally, when my daughter went off to her second year of college in 2000, I had a serious discussion with my Mother about me moving to the city and us moving in together into a home. We rented a nice place together and I have been caring for her on a daily basis ever since. I am proud to say that my Mother is now 85 years old and still alive. And believe me, if I had not stepped up to the plate and took on the responsibility that every child should do, she would not be alive today. I am an only child, have no help with my Mother, but I handle it. Her doctors made me give her things to do at home to keep her active and moving around. Her chores are this - do the dishes a little at a time and run the sweeper when you feel up to it. My Mother is a CHF patient, has A-Fib, has had I cannot tell you how many life threatening surgeries over the years that I have been her caregiver. I actually lost a very good job because I had to choose to be at the hospital when my Mother had surgery or be at work. Jobs are a dime a dozen. Parents are not. Yes, we fuss at each other from time to time but that is because we are both stubborn.

I was just diagonised with a brain tumor that is inoperable. Do you think that is going to stop me from caring for my Mother? NO! Do think I came home from the neuro surgeon's office and laid this burden on my Mother? NO! She will never know about the tumor. What is the point? So she can worry herself to death about me? NO!

So stop your whining and get it together. Be thankful you have parents and are able to defrost the stupid freezer and be there when your parents need you. I do everything, the yard work, the laundry, the grocery shopping, the cooking, the gardening, the canning - EVERYTHING!  Yes, I have slowed down since the headaches started and the brain tumor was diagonised. Sometimes we eat frozen food. So what? I cannot do as much as I did before, but I will be darned if my Mother is not taken care of.

So my advice to you is to STOP WHINING, STEP UP TO THE PLATE AND BE THANKFUL YOU STILL HAVE PARENTS TO LOVE AND CARE FOR. You said you were 53 years old, well you are acting like you a 5 years old. I am almost 52 years old, have numerous health problems myself, but it is not stopping me.

When things get overwhelming, go see a friend, go to a movie, call a friend on the phone, talk to people in general, go for a drive, anything. But don't blame this on your poor parents. You should be ashamed of yourself. No if's, and's or but's about it. Just extremely ashamed.

 

   

        When you use the caps key on your keyboard for emphasis, you are trying to shout.   That is a lot of emotion for a person with an inoperable brain tumor.  You have enough problems of your own to dish out the insults at me.  (I counted four and then I lost interest)

        I never asked for your advice.  How do you find the time to insult someone you have never met?

          

         

 
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March 29, 2008, 9:56 am PDT

Disabled AND Homeless

         I cannot relate to people who don't want to work! I want more than anything to be able to but I have an illness that keeps me from it. I use to live on my own with the help of section eight. I had to move back in with my mother In 1999 due to her failing health. She died this past New Years Eve after suffering a stroke two days before Christmas. Holidays are ruined forever now.

         She left me HOMELESS in her will! I cannot rent an apartment because my income is far too low! In my state you have to earn three times the rent to get an apartment or house! So does anyone know where I can go for $200.00 per month? I sure don't! I have NO ONE to help me! I have NO FRIENDS and my "family" has disowned me. In order to keep my disability I MUST have an address so within the next few months I will lose that too! I have Diabetes, Heart trouble, Asthma and Depression! I have to stop my medications because I have lost my insurance that paid for it. I do have one tiny place the dog and I can go. MY CAR! So does anyone have any suggestions? My local resources are telling me too bad! I'm back on the section eight waiting list BUT that could take two or more years and without an address I'll never know when of if my name comes up!

 
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March 29, 2008, 10:02 am PDT

03/27 "Get Your Act Together!"

Quote From: naturesgir

True, but at least FDR's CCC required men to *work* for their bread-and-butter...  I say bring back the workhouses...  If it's starve or go to a workhouse, they'll go to a workhouse, but it won't be a nice subsidized apartment where they can do nothing all day in comfort...  Bet they'd "find jobs" real quick.

 

Yes, Huckabee had the right idea, and Ron Paul was the only one courageous enough to utter the word "Welfare"...  But who've we got running?  Two socialists and an old man...  This country is in BIG trouble.

Much of our national park system, including one of my favorites, the Blue Ridge Parkway, was built by CCC workers. My husband and I drive on the BRP every chance we get. And, go there every August to pick its wild blueberries.
You're right about Clinton and Obama being socialists. But, I don't considerr McCain too old. Reagan was almost his age. I do think, whoever is President, we need to pack congress with enough people to bring about some good legislation and over-ride a presidential veto.
 
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chillin'
March 29, 2008, 10:30 am PDT

Too lazy to work??

     Regarding the guy who has lost 75 jobs in the last 6 yrs.   He might be lazy or he might really have a serious problem working a job if he can't pay attention to detail,focus/concentrate,follow -through,short-term memory,multi-task,follow directions.  Employers won't put up with that and will probably label him as lazy,not team player,or stupid.  If his ADHD(or worse brain injury,seizure disorder,severe cognitive deficits.) I Have seizure disorder,and a brain injury from the seizures, I have not been able to hold a job and have lost every job I have ever had.(regardless of trying to help myself in every way possible.((meds,therapy,voc rehab,career counseling,etc)  I was called by many people lazy,stupid,liar.etc.  I know how it feels.  We shouldn't rush to judgement.  Dr. PHil should help him with therapy,ad testing,evaluation of his impairment and the severity.
 
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March 29, 2008, 12:25 pm PDT

Get Your Act Together

OMG........... Mike U better grow up buddy.  This show really got to me.  I can't believe the attitude this guy had.  He had a smurky smile on his face the whole show.  He sounds like the most laziest and unappreciative person I have ever seen.  Way To Go step dad.............. I know how the Mom feels because I use to do the same thing with my kids.  I had to learn the hard way.  I would do anything for my kids and they for me, But if they became the way Mike is they would be gone before they could blink their eyes.  If I were Amanda he would have been gone along time ago.  I think he would have been if Amanda was a stronger person, but I think she is afraid to tell him to grow up and get a job, because she is afraid to be by herself with no one.   I just want to say to her if he doesn't shape up soon she should get rid of him, and she will never be alone. She will always have her family for support and help.  My situation was different, I took my ex back 5 times before he left for good.  I was afraid to be alone with 5 little kids, but in the end he did leave and I couldn't believe the support and help I had from my family and friends. This is when you find out who your real friends are.  I was very grateful to have them all.
 
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March 30, 2008, 5:18 am PDT

to the two men that don't work

they are to much for the one that seems to have adhd bull you can still work and for the one that has a crimal record you can still work so what if u get a low paying job as long at u are working to help out why should any mom work and the so called father stay home and do nothing. if these men want to stay home then look after the kids so mom can make sure the bills are paid and food in the house saves on child care and for the grandparents they should beable to spend time with these children frome time to time as grandparents
 
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chillin'
April 5, 2008, 11:32 am PDT

Understanding Disability cituation

Quote From: itsme62

I cannot relate to people who don't want to work! I want more than anything to be able to but I have an illness that keeps me from it. I use to live on my own with the help of section eight. I had to move back in with my mother In 1999 due to her failing health. She died this past New Years Eve after suffering a stroke two days before Christmas. Holidays are ruined forever now.

She left me HOMELESS in her will! I cannot rent an apartment because my income is far too low! In my state you have to earn three times the rent to get an apartment or house! So does anyone know where I can go for $200.00 per month? I sure don't! I have NO ONE to help me! I have NO FRIENDS and my 'family' has disowned me. In order to keep my disability I MUST have an address so within the next few months I will lose that too! I have Diabetes, Heart trouble, Asthma and Depression! I have to stop my medications because I have lost my insurance that paid for it. I do have one tiny place the dog and I can go. MY CAR! So does anyone have any suggestions? My local resources are telling me too bad! I'm back on the section eight waiting list BUT that could take two or more years and without an address I'll never know when of if my name comes up!

 I can empathize with your situation.  I am sorry to hear that you are having to deal with the f***ed up system/government that we have in US.  I am also disabled and have tried everything to help myself/situation.  It is so frustrating/depressing.  The gov't doesn't care and makes it difficult to get any help.

Have you tried applying for disability(soc sec),and General Assitance from your state while you fight Disability??  You will also need to contact a disability lawyer in your state to help with it.  (they work on contingency)  You can also google disability resources.   Go to the CBS news website with Katie Cueric as she did a story regarding disability and there is a lady who runs a coaltion who has suggestions to help your situation.

Good luck to you.
 
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chillin'
May 26, 2008, 10:27 am PDT

so called adhd bull

Quote From: unsungkit

they are to much for the one that seems to have adhd bull you can still work and for the one that has a crimal record you can still work so what if u get a low paying job as long at u are working to help out why should any mom work and the so called father stay home and do nothing. if these men want to stay home then look after the kids so mom can make sure the bills are paid and food in the house saves on child care and for the grandparents they should beable to spend time with these children frome time to time as grandparents
     How do you know if his "adhd is bull"? are you a specialist?  Do you have it yourself?  ADHD is an umbrella term to describe cognitive problems that can range from light to severly afflicted(or be missed diagnosed as I was when I actually have an brain injury and seizures)  Not focusing,multi-tasking,paying attention,memory ,etc are big time problems which employers,other employees won't tolerate.  medicine sometimes doesn't help.   I don't know how terribly he is afflicted and neither do you so you shouldn''t presume that you do!!!
 

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