While watching this the other day, the second part with the mother, daughter and son-in-law really bothered me and brought up feelings I thought I had overcome.
I have been with my husband for 7 years we have two children and are expecting our third this summer. When we first met in Nov. of 2000 and in Feb of 2001 we found out we were expecting our first child..quick..I know but we were excited either way! When we told everyone, we met with a little bit of opposition from my husbands side (too soon, too young (20years each) but regardless they knew we were happy so they were happy for us. My family decided to go the other route. From my stepdad saying I should have an abortion, to my mother saying leave him, live with us, go back to your ex. We were harassed constantly by both phone and email for the entire 9 months. My mother would say things like when you need me I won't be there since he is there to I think of you as dead since it is easier for me to handle that than to know that you are with him. They wrote letters to my husband's boss, high school teacher, pastor, parents and grandparents saying things like "he drugged our daughter and got her knocked up so she would stay with him" They made what should have been a happy time, very stressful. We had our number changed and moved and they still found a way to find us. When I was in labour I had my mother come (what daughter doesn't want her mother there) well she wouldn't come near me unless my husband and his family left, she made a scene in the waiting room and forced her way into the room as soon as she found out our daughter was born. Cut to our wedding, no one in my family showed up expect for my parents and sister they sat at the back, again caused a scene and then as soon as the ceremony was over (20 mins) they were gone. When we found out we were pregnant again the first words out of my mother's mouth were "don't you two believe in birthcontrol" yet another stressing pregnancy. I had a miscarriage a year and a half later and so I called my mother to try and lean on her for some help and advice and all she said was its better you two didn't have a 3rd child, you don't need one.
Now here we are 7 years later, pregnant for a fourth time, no congrats, just more bitterness. We recently moved to be closer to my husband's family and she has outright refused to come and visit even if my husband is not there. She calls only when she wants something and treats my son as if he isn't there (as he looks like his father and our daughter looks like me) I don't hear from anyone else in my family as she as made sure that everyone hates us. My sister, finally getting a little dose of what I have gone through has finally started talking to me again. I get a phone call once a year from my stepdad asking to talk to the kids on Christmas and that's it!
We have tried just about everything we can think of to try and make things right and good among us but nothing works and everytime a special occasion arises I get my hopes up thinking this time will be different and then I get crushed when we go out of our way to try and attend the occasions. I am tired of feeling this way and it has caused occasional agruments between my husband and I. I implore the mothers and fathers to please just let your children live their own lives, be there to support them through thick and thin sometimes they do know what is best for themselves. After watching, I am so glad that I have never vented to my mother about some of our arguments, nothing like adding feul to a fire-I keep a journal and it gets me through everything. I just wish my family would grow up and accept the fact that my husband and our children are here to stay, so my kids could know their only aunt and their other set of grandparents since they are not only hurting me, they are also hurting my kids and themselves, with all the stuff they have already missed out.
(Original Air Date 01/18/08) Do you have someone in your life who’s so annoying and frustrating that you just want him or her to go away? What do you do when that person is your ex and the parent of your children? Todd says his ex-wife, Nicholle, needs to butt out of his life, even though they share custody of their two daughters. He says he’s tired of her showing up unannounced, so she can be with the girls when it isn’t her time. Nicholle says Todd and his new wife, Michelle, fail to keep her informed about the girls -- like the time their little girl was in the emergency room. Both parents agree that the girls feel upset every time they have to go to their dad’s house. Cameras capture a typical custody exchange. What is the cause of the chaos? Dr. Phil points out the mistakes these divorced parents are making as he tries to get to the bottom of the threats and name-calling. Can these co-parents learn how to get along with each other for the sake of the kids? Then, meet a mother who hates her son-in-law so much, she refuses to have a relationship with her own daughter unless she divorces him. They face off for the first time in three years. Talk about the show here.
