For the last couple who was on today, the smokers who are parents who were not interested in changing their lifestyles:
I understand the sentiment of living a shorter, happier life than a longer miserable life. I submit, however, that by making the lifestyle changes recommended to you that you would not only find the span of your life increasing, but the happiness in your life increasing as well.
I define it, in my life, as the difference between having a pleasant life and having a fulfilling, happy life. I don't smoke, or eat much fast food, but I have my own issues day to day making choices that are more pleasant in the moment, but unfulfilling in the long run (long run being as short as later that day), or choosing behaviors that for a moment seem harder, but almost immediately make me happier when I choose them.
When you are strong and healthy from eating well and being physically fit, your joy in all things increases dramatically. You barely miss what you have given up because you are substituting them for things that make you feel so good. Over time, you stop missing those things all together. You start with paying attention to how you feel after you have excercised versus how you feel after the Big Mac and fries. You give attention to the energy that you have not smoking versus the temporary 'fix' from the cigarette. You have security from having health insurance, paid for from what you have saved in cigarettes. (I pay for my own insurance, out of savings right now, and have just found a plan that I am SURE is less than what you are paying every month for cigarettes!) You have a closer relationship with each other and your children because you are walking together, or biking together, or lifting weights together every evening as a family. Making yourself go is not as pleasant at the outset as sitting in front of the TV with a bag of chips, a beer, and your cigarettes but within 10 minutes of starting, the endorphines have kicked in and you find yourself joking with each other and finding out more about your children than you ever did watching TV.
And those are just the immediate benefits. Long term, you get to dance at your children's weddings. (Ballroom classes is another way you could spend your cigarette money that would be great fun, bring you closer to each other and get you in shape.) You can play with your grandchildren. You can find new interests in a life which is so rich and for which you have new energy and new respect. You can get more joy from your sex life than you have in years! (Excercise increases your sex drive and ability.)
And for your children, you will be teaching them that they matter to you. That they should matter to them. Do you wish for your children to grow up with the same health issues that you have? You may be ready to die any day, but do you want your children to live only to 50? If that. You are teaching them that you are not important enough to you to take care of yourself and that they are not important enough to you to take care of yourself. What do you dream for their lives? Your behavior NOW can help make that come true or it can be an almost insurmountable barrier.
As a last thought: to the husband - I lost a fiance a many years ago to heart disease. He was 45 and his first heart attack was his last. Smoking and family history were his biggest risk factors. His eating habits weren't fantastic, but were not that bad. Smoking is huge. And to your wife - just because you haven't had the heart attack yet doesn't mean that it isn't on the horizan. You could leave your children orphaned. My cousin just lost his wife - age 44. She was having trouble breathing and went to the hospital. They suspected her heart and were going to do a scan, but while there, she threw a blood clot and was dead before anyone could do anything. My cousin is devastated and their two children are only 11 and 12. They now have to finish growing up without a mother. You look alot like she did - reminded me of her in face, body shape, expressions - only the hair was different. She had no previous symptoms. She nor my cousin took care of themselves, physically. Now her children are paying the price.
You can make it different. And you may be surprised to find that what you think you are "sacrificing" is really the anchor that was stopping you from living a truly joyful life! Feeling great is a better rush than a drag on a cigarette. Having the energy to play with your grandchildren (who you are alive to meet) will bring you more joy than the moments of dread when you prep for excercise. There are so many ways to be active, you can most likely find some activities that you actually enjoy rather than dreading - sports, walking or biking as a family, dancing, martial arts, weights, classes at a gym, etc. And it will bring you closer than ever as a family and nothing in a cigarette box or fast food bag can ever bring you as much joy as that!
GOOD LUCK - I'm pulling for you!
Steven Cojocaru, known to fans as Cojo, was the go-to fashion guy on the red carpet and lived a life of glitz and glamour. But that changed when he received the worst news of his life –- he was diagnosed with kidney disease and needed a transplant -- not once, but twice. Cojo chronicles his struggles in the book, Glamour, Interrupted: How I Became the Best Dressed Patient in Hollywood, and sits down with Dr. Phil to talk about his tumultuous journey. Then, Terri has been on dialysis for two-and-a-half years as she desperately waits for a kidney donor. She joins the show via Web cam to find out how Cojo maintained his positive attitude and how she can stay in the right frame of mind while waiting for a transplant. Plus, Alison and Danaye say their sister, Missie, has had two kidney transplants, and they’re worried she’s going to need a third because of her stressful lifestyle. The sisters say their mom, Janaye, is at fault for coddling Missie her whole life. What will it take for Missie to slow her life down and for her siblings to back off? And, meet a man who had a heart attack but checked out of the hospital so he could smoke a cigarette! His mom says she’s desperate to help him before he ends up in an early grave. Talk about the show here.
