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Topic : 01/24 "I Want Out!"

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Created on : Friday, January 18, 2008, 02:26:08 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
When couples tie the knot, they vow to stay together "'til death do us part," but what happens when a marriage takes a few bad turns, and one partner desperately wants out? Dr. Phil's guests are at a crossroads in their marriages. Hector and Nicole have been married nine years, and Nicole says she's done with the marriage, no longer loves her husband and has a boyfriend to prove it! Hector says he loves his wife and is desperate to save his marriage. He's even paid thousands for Nicole to have plastic surgery! Can Dr. Phil convince Nicole to give up her lover and give her marriage another shot? And, Shaun wants to dump his wife, Nancy, for good because he says she stalks him and throws herself in front of the door to keep him from leaving. Nancy is convinced Shaun still loves her, and she's hoping they can resurrect their union. Is there hope for this couple, or should they walk away? Tell us what you think.

Find out what happened on the show.

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April 6, 2008, 6:19 am CDT

CRUELTY - MANIPULATIONS - HATRED - RAGE - REVENGE

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is a psychological disorder characterized by pervasive instability in self-image, behavior, moods, and interpersonal relationships.  This instability often disrupts family and work life, long-term planning, and the individual's sense of self-identity. 

 

While less known than schizophrenia or bipolar disorder (manic-depressive illness), BPD is more common, affecting 2% of adults (1-33), mostly females.  Some of my favorite books that provide a great introduction and insight are:

 

 

Emotional Blackmail:  When the People in Your Life Use Fear, Obligation and Guilt to Manipulate You by Susan Forward AND Why is it Always About You?  The Seven Deadly Sins of Narcissism by Sandy Hotchkiss

 

Get Me Out of Here:  My Recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder by Rachel Reiland OR Girl Interrupted by Susanna Kaysen OR Stop Walking on Eggshells:  Taking Your Life Back...by Paul Mason and Randi Kreger

 

Understanding the Borderline (Parent) Mother:  Helping Her Children Transcend the Intense, Unpredictable and Volatile Relationship by Christine Ann Lawson OR Surviving a Borderline Parent:  How to Heal Your Childhood Wounds & Build Trust, Boundaries and Self-Esteem by Kimberlee Roth and Freda Friedman

 

Overcoming Passive-Aggression:  How to Stop Hidden Anger from Spoiling Your Relationships...by Tim Murphy and Loriann Oberlin

 

High Conflict People in Legal Disputes by Bill Eddy OR Divorce Poison:  Protecting the Parent-Child Bond from a Vindictive (Relative) Ex by Richard Warshak  

 

 

Some of the story is typical:  feelings of insecurity contributing to destructive behaviors such as promiscuity, manipulations, self-abuse, rage attacks, revenge, addictions, and eating disorders.  The extreme behaviors of BPD constitute the high drama in the stories of those who endure its ravages.

 

Though harder to spot, emotional abuse is easier to deny.  But just as physical abuse has signposts to mark its presence, emotional abuse, being a systematic attack on one's sense of self, has common traits.  Physical abuse comes in degrees of severity - emotional abuse also runs the gamut of intensity and damage.

 

Hope it helps!

 

 

 
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