Topic : 08/18 "Sober Up or Else!"

Listen Dr. Phil, I respect you very much and I see my last message was not posted about this show.  I will try again to say what I wanted to say.  I understand you need to be tough on the addict.  I went to 12 steps for my addicts for 5 years and learned tough love.  But when you called her "WOMAN" instead of her name it really stung me and many of my friends that watch the show.  She, at this point doesn't even know who she is, in the drunken fog at least show her the dignity to call her by her name...Joey...not WOMAN!  My heart goes out to that family, but I will say one thing, she must have done something right her daughters were polite, beautiful, articulate and respectful.  I don't believe anyone chooses that kind of life.  I pray that beautiful family gets peace.  By the way the commercials are getting me to not want to watch.  It is like a cliff hanger every 2 minutes. 

I agree there are too many commercials and too close together. it's like they say five words and then go to commercial, say five words, go to commercial. I love the show but cant this be fixed like other shows do?

I do not understand why you don't encourage family members to go to Al-Anon.  Having grown up in an alcoholic home with a drunk mother, the best advice I have ever gotten was to go to Al-Anon.  I noticed that on your resources that you mentioned AA and ACA.but not Al-Anon...please list Al-Anon.  Alot of small towns don't even have ACA meetings, but do have Al-Anon.  Is there a reason when you have a show on addiction that you never suggest to family members that they try Al-Anon?  Al-Anon has saved my life.

 your show brought me to tears. I am a survivor. I can feel the pain the daughters have had to endure. What people need to understand is how their decisions and problems affect the ones they love. When we are grown, our lives are affected in every aspect of what we do. How we handle things in our adult lives is a direct result of our childhood. I hope the daughters get as much help as the mom. God Bless everyone who has had to walk in the shoes of a child under the care of adults who can't get their act together and be responsible enough to care about the future of the precious gifts given unto them.

Thanks to DVR's I just watched this show and I'm sooo glad I could!  Every thing about the show affected me but I've got to say that I was most impressed with Heather, the oldest daughter.  Could I adopt this girl?  She is amazing!  It was so clear how very much she loves her mom but the pain was overwhelming as well.  My parents created quite a disfunctional family for me to grow up in and I've never been able to be as kind and loving toward them as Heather is to her mom.  Yes, her frustration and pain is very clear but what a mature, responsible, caring young woman she is!!!  I hope she has someone in her life that is proud of her and tells her that every single day of her life.  If not, let me tell her right now...she has LOTS to be proud of.  The people I think most of in this world are my daughters but aside from them, you are my absolute hero!  Amazing individual.  Good luck to you and may God Bless You. 

A few years ago, outside of my house, I saw a Jaguar just sitting in the middle of the road.  My house was for sale so I assumed it was a shopper, but the next time I looked, I saw a dazed woman sitting in the car with her door open.  I went outside to see what was wrong and the woman turned out to be one of my neighbors drunk as a skunk.  

 

I was going to call an ambulance for her, which is what I should have done because she ended up in the hospital 2 days later, but ANOTHER neighbor came along (her so called friend) and talked me out of it, so we basically just drove her home.  In her drunken state she kept saying "what's the big deal".....

 

  Now, in this high powered sports car along with this incoherent woman, was drycleaning she had picked up, and all sorts of other errand evidence.  She had been all over the place that very day.  It was a terrible thing to see, and I did make some phone calls regarding her, mainly to see how she was and to state that I felt we made the wrong decision.  The odd part of this story is that everyone I spoke with seemed VERY concerned about the fact that she would no longer be able to drive if I contacted anyone.  As it turned out, she was already supposed to have one of those breathalizer devices attached to the car, and she did not......why was everyone so willing to protect HER driving?    

 

well, I do hope this woman gets help but someone please TOW HER CAR.  Love, Luanne

According to the best estimates, about one in eight  Americans-more than 30 million-are products of alcoholic homes.  The National Institute on Alcohol Abuse & Alcoholism says that 6.6 million kids are living with an alcoholic parent now.

 

What's life like for them?  Growing up is a constant struggle to cope with disappointment and stress and embarrassment.  It's a place where a kid's needs are often downplayed or ignored, and the family life centers on the psychological "games" of the drinking parent. 

 

Until recently, children of alcoholics weren't even considered all that different from other kids with problems.  They were often ignored by treatment programs, which focused on the alcoholic parent.  In an alcoholic family, a child's need for love, support, and emotional nurturing is often minimized or forgotten altogether in the endless tug-of-war between the family and alcoholism.  For referral services in your area contact:

 

 

Children of Alcoholics Foundation

www.coaf.org

 

 

Common problems of children of alcoholics are:  guilt, anxiety, embarrassment, confusion, inability to trust, anger and depression.  Probably the most difficult step in the healing process is the first one--for the child to openly identify the problem and begin to talk about his or her sadness and anger. 

 

Hope it helps!

 

 

 i have been living with an acloholic for the last 20 yrs or more. when i watch the show the other day the story was me i have so many empty promises and told i am sorry so many times you do not believe them anymore it is hard to trust them. you feel sometime you are going to snap we'll i tried that just landed me in the hospitol i have a lot of compassion for the family that was on tv  hope it work for there mother

I have a drinking problem. My father gave me my first drink when I was 9 yrs old. I have 2 boys, 19 & 21 and they had to live with an alcoholic Mother. Not as bad asthe lady on the show.

 I don't know how to get help...how do these people afford to go to rehab? And the daughter said that lady had been many, many times. From what I've herd it's very expensive...I would love to go through a 30 day program but don't have the money. If anyone has any suggestion I would love to hear them.

Thanks, CJ

Why on earth would Dr. Phil allow anyone to tell another human being "I wish you were dead."  Was that supposed to shock her into getting help?  This woman is already exhibiting suicidal actions- driving drunk, drinking to excess, etc.  How will they feel if she ends up like Anna Nichole?  Why is it we can have sympathy for her- because she is famous? 

My father was an alcoholic.  My mother was an enabler, victim.  I had often asked my dad why he loved to drink more than us.  Why he liked his booze buddies more than his family.  I never said I wished he was dead.  (I used to think it at times.)   I would never have been able to live with myself if he drove off a road after I said something like that.