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Topic : 02/22 Hell Weddings

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Created on : Thursday, February 14, 2008, 03:54:15 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Every bride wants to shine on her special day -- from wearing the perfect gown to hosting the most extravagant reception. But what happens when the dream of the perfect wedding turns into a nightmare? Janae knows about this pain firsthand. Her husband, Michael, got so drunk before the ceremony that he passed out cold after saying “I do” and didn’t wake up until the next day!  Janae attended the reception by herself and spent her wedding night with her bridesmaids at a hotel. Their wedding from hell took place two years ago, but she still tears up at the memory of that fateful day. Can she ever forgive Michael's mishaps, or is he doomed to the doghouse forever? Then, Angela is a self-professed bridezilla who makes no excuses for her demanding ways. She even created a newsletter for her bridesmaids with the rules and regulations they must follow to participate in her wedding! Her sister and maid of honor, Vanessa, worries that Angela's nitpicking will cause her fiancé, Marvin, to run for the hills. What's behind Angela's controlling behavior, and is she headed for heartache on her special day? Share your thoughts here.

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February 17, 2008, 5:22 pm CST

02/22 Hell Weddings

This is a little off topic, but wasn't it awful about that bride that had a heart attack and died at her reception?(She wasn't elderly) I don't understand the "bridezilla" phenomenon. I never ever wanted or dreamed of a big wedding. We got married on an island on our nearby lake in blue jeans.(34 years ago in May.No reception) I certainly understand if women want a nice wedding, don't get me wrong. But, I don't think it's o.k. to go plumb crazy and be mean to the wedding party or get drunk before the wedding. There needs to be some restraint shown on everyone's part. The thing is, the reason to be getting married in the first place is far more important than the wedding itself.

 
February 18, 2008, 6:20 am CST

Chill out

Chill out. The wedding day is only the start of the marriage. Yes, it is important, but today too much time and money is spent on the "Big Day" The real wedding begins when the "big day" is over. A marriage is what you do after the wedding day.  Being together and building a strong relationship is what is important. Yes, I would have been upset with my husband if he'd gotton drunk, but I suspect he didn't just find alcohol on the day of the wedding. As far as Bridezillias, GROW UP.  No one wants to be with a ^&tch.  20 minutes after you are married all the "stuff" doesn't seem as important. You'd better figure out what the hell is more important, having a "perfect" wedding or having a good relationship with your family, friends and spouse.
 
February 18, 2008, 7:35 am CST

Bridezilla or Control Freaks??

Weddings are just a way of celebrating with friends and family your love and committment to each other.  I understand dream weddings, I had one myself. In fact, I had two weddings. My first one was absolutely beautiful, but 3 months later, the marriage went sour. My second wedding is still laughable till this day, but the marriage is wonderful. The wedding was plagued with everything imaginable. The cake was picked up by one of the bridesmaids in an effort to save money, but she left it in her car throughout the ceremony and it had to be rebuilt and refrigerated before it could be bought out. The musicians never showed at the church so we had to find a song for the procession. Try using the same song for the bridesmaids, bride and unity candle ceremony. The bartender forgot the date, so we had to get my son to tend bar. However, the food was awesome and the DJ magnificent, and the best part of the deal was the man I got. The best in the world. Moral...we put too much importance on the wedding and not enough on the marriage.

 To the woman whose groom passed out after saying "I do", well, he married you first (smile). So, go back and have another ceremony, now that the hard part is out of the way, have fun. 

 
February 18, 2008, 6:47 pm CST

02/22 Hell Weddings

Quote From: gctate

Weddings are just a way of celebrating with friends and family your love and committment to each other.  I understand dream weddings, I had one myself. In fact, I had two weddings. My first one was absolutely beautiful, but 3 months later, the marriage went sour. My second wedding is still laughable till this day, but the marriage is wonderful. The wedding was plagued with everything imaginable. The cake was picked up by one of the bridesmaids in an effort to save money, but she left it in her car throughout the ceremony and it had to be rebuilt and refrigerated before it could be bought out. The musicians never showed at the church so we had to find a song for the procession. Try using the same song for the bridesmaids, bride and unity candle ceremony. The bartender forgot the date, so we had to get my son to tend bar. However, the food was awesome and the DJ magnificent, and the best part of the deal was the man I got. The best in the world. Moral...we put too much importance on the wedding and not enough on the marriage.

 To the woman whose groom passed out after saying "I do", well, he married you first (smile). So, go back and have another ceremony, now that the hard part is out of the way, have fun. 

Your second wedding and mine both! LOL

 

My plagues included the original matron of honor cancelling out owing to personal reasons (luckily there was time to ask someone else), the mother, daughter, and niece of the bride all coming down with food poisoning the morning of the ceremony (my niece hurled in the church), and the wedding being delayed for an hour b/c the mother of the groom was involved in a car accident en route to the church. Fortunately, nobody was injured, the investigating trooper met up with my new MIL after the ceremony (he pulled in as we were recessing!), the reception folks were gracious about the delay, and all was well that ended well. Like you, the man I got was the best part of the deal. =)

 

ITA with your moral of the story.

 

Prof

 
February 18, 2008, 9:01 pm CST

If you need to be DRUNK to get married...

Neither of you should have walked down the aisle, if one or the other feels they need to be totally uninhibited to make the most solemn commitment of their lives.  Marriage is not to be entered into likely, much less DRUNK. 

 

In my opinion, this Vanessa girl has it all wrong, it is not the GROOM that ran for the HILLS, as he got married, it is the BRIDE; however, that should have run for the hills.  What possessed you to go through with a wedding to someone who was obviously in no condition to drive, much less get married?  What kind of love can you feel -- from a poor excuse of a man that felt the need to get drunk to marry you. 

 

Take if from someone who just recommitted to his wife, for our 10th anniversary, I would have NOT insulted my bride that way on our first wedding, nor would I have insulted my children like that during our renewal of vows.  Drinking for a social activity, has it's place, and the alter is NOT one of them.

 
February 18, 2008, 9:05 pm CST

Have a relationship with a DRUNK???

Quote From: anaj_67

Chill out. The wedding day is only the start of the marriage. Yes, it is important, but today too much time and money is spent on the "Big Day" The real wedding begins when the "big day" is over. A marriage is what you do after the wedding day.  Being together and building a strong relationship is what is important. Yes, I would have been upset with my husband if he'd gotton drunk, but I suspect he didn't just find alcohol on the day of the wedding. As far as Bridezillias, GROW UP.  No one wants to be with a &tch.  20 minutes after you are married all the "stuff" doesn't seem as important. You'd better figure out what the hell is more important, having a "perfect" wedding or having a good relationship with your family, friends and spouse.
These days it is hard enough having a successful relationship with someone with all their senses.  It is much harder, wait, impossible to have a relationship with a DRUNK.  This is then a one sided relationship, as the DRUNK, is really never there.  Please don't put this on the bride, if the groom could not accept a bride who obviously had high expectations he should have bailed out during the dating phase, not wait to emotionally detach by making himself so DRUNK, he could not even enjoy a wedding night. That is so sad!!!
 
February 18, 2008, 9:15 pm CST

Very good advice...

Quote From: gottoknow

I think I'd have given him the boot at the time he collapsed at the wedding ceremony.  However, I have a feeling that after this long, a few counseling sessions would be in order, and at the proper time, a renewal of the wedding vows would be in order.

If Angela sees something in this DRUNKEN fool, we don't know, then give him another chance and RENEW those vows under a more favorable, less stressful situation.  After counseling, and a successful completion of the AA 12 Step Program for him, and he stays off for at least a year and prove his Love and Dedication.

 

Angela, yes, if you are going to do this -- lighten up.  Take it from a guy that put to major weddings together in the same decade.  Yes our original wedding date was September 6, 1997, our renewal, because we wanted the kids to be out of school for it, and the date sounded cute was on July 7, 2007.  Get it 7-7-7, and yes our reminder magnets had slot machines with the 7 7 7 up on them. 

 

I love my wife with all my heart.  I would never do anything to embarrass her, or our children, And we BOTH enjoyed putting together every little detail of each wedding, from the cake topper, to the ceremony and all the way down to the wedding favor.  Oh and for a twist, I DJ'ed the renewal of vows, as I wanted to make sure our music got played.  Both wedding were remarkable, memorable, stressful for the desire to have nothing go wrong, but full of love, lack of liquor at least before the ceremony and we still are like love birds today. 

 

I pray you some day, feel what we feel, if now with the one you are with, then each of you with partners that could fully appreciate and understand who you are today, as that may never change.

 
February 19, 2008, 8:54 am CST

Great Point!

Quote From: gctate

Weddings are just a way of celebrating with friends and family your love and committment to each other.  I understand dream weddings, I had one myself. In fact, I had two weddings. My first one was absolutely beautiful, but 3 months later, the marriage went sour. My second wedding is still laughable till this day, but the marriage is wonderful. The wedding was plagued with everything imaginable. The cake was picked up by one of the bridesmaids in an effort to save money, but she left it in her car throughout the ceremony and it had to be rebuilt and refrigerated before it could be bought out. The musicians never showed at the church so we had to find a song for the procession. Try using the same song for the bridesmaids, bride and unity candle ceremony. The bartender forgot the date, so we had to get my son to tend bar. However, the food was awesome and the DJ magnificent, and the best part of the deal was the man I got. The best in the world. Moral...we put too much importance on the wedding and not enough on the marriage.

 To the woman whose groom passed out after saying "I do", well, he married you first (smile). So, go back and have another ceremony, now that the hard part is out of the way, have fun. 

 

 

"..put too much importance on the wedding and

    not enough on the marriage"

 

INSTEAD OF BRIDES THINKING ABOUT THE REST OF THEIR LIVES...

THEY CHOOSE TO CONCERN THEMSELVES WITH WHAT OTHERS WILL THINK?????????

 

SOME ACT AS THOUGH THEY'RE THE FIRST TWO PEOPLE - EVER- TO HAVE A WEDDING????

 

DON'T GET IT...

 

GOOD FOR YOUR POSITIVE ATTITUDE AND REALIZING WHAT REALLY MATTERS.

 
February 19, 2008, 9:09 am CST

Agree!

Quote From: anaj_67

Chill out. The wedding day is only the start of the marriage. Yes, it is important, but today too much time and money is spent on the "Big Day" The real wedding begins when the "big day" is over. A marriage is what you do after the wedding day.  Being together and building a strong relationship is what is important. Yes, I would have been upset with my husband if he'd gotton drunk, but I suspect he didn't just find alcohol on the day of the wedding. As far as Bridezillias, GROW UP.  No one wants to be with a &tch.  20 minutes after you are married all the "stuff" doesn't seem as important. You'd better figure out what the hell is more important, having a "perfect" wedding or having a good relationship with your family, friends and spouse.

 

Way too much time and money are spent on

"The Big Day' or actually "The Big Year" is better

suited after the bride bosses around family and

friends all year...telling them what they expect them

to wear, spent, sit, give up time off work etc...

 

ha ha it never ends......

 
February 19, 2008, 9:22 am CST

AN FYI FOR MY FRIENDS...

 

 

IF ANY OF YOU SHOULD EVEN THINK OF SENDING ME A NEWSLETTER

 

WITH "RULES"  TO FOLLOW FOR THE WEDDING,  WE WON'T EVER SPEAK AGAIN.

 

THOSE OF YOU PLANNING TO HAVE CHILDREN WILL MISS OUT ON

MORE GIFTS, MONEY ETC...THESE FUNDS WILL SIMPLY SHUT DOWN.

 

 

 
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