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Topic : 02/27 Internet Cheats

Number of Replies: 105
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Created on : Friday, February 22, 2008, 12:13:14 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Dr. Phil talks with an engaged couple who can’t agree on what is appropriate online behavior. Tameka wants her fiancé, Keith, to shut down his three MySpace profiles that she says he uses to flirt with other women. She says he’s addicted to the social networking site and has already cheated on her twice with women he’s met online. Keith says he uses his profiles to promote his business as an entertainer, and flirting is just part of the job. He says getting rid of his profiles would be like cutting off his arm! What happens when Tameka creates her own provocative profile? Will it give Keith a taste of his own medicine? Then, Dr. Phil follows up with this couple one month later. Tameka says she’s still suspicious of Keith’s fidelity. Keith says he’s willing to do anything to prove that he is being faithful, but will he take Dr. Phil up on his offer to take a lie detector test? Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

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February 27, 2008, 2:11 pm CST

02/27 Internet Cheats

Quote From: gwarrior6

 

If he cheated on you in the past, do you think he's not doing it online?  Especially if he' s changing his password to intentionally keep you out. 

 

I don't think you're "overbearing" at all...especially in light of his cheating past.  He's the one being inappropriate, IMO, NOT you.  I'd pack his bags for him and throw him out on the streetcorner where he belongs.  You're too good to be cheated on like that!

     He'll probably refuse to give me his password.  I've thought about hacking into it,  what do you think?

 
February 27, 2008, 2:14 pm CST

Typical Double Standard

Good ole Keith is suffering from the good ole double standard....

 

It's PERFECTLY okay for Mr. Man Keith to maintain not one but THREE pages on MySpace, but he has a hissy fit and demands that Tameka take her ONE MySpace page down. 

 

Nice Keith, are you some sort of caveman or something?  If you are going to keep your pages, then Tameka can also keep hers...if you are going to be a man and remove your pages (don't buy any of his cr*p about it being for business) then Tameka should remove hers...

 

You complain about her pages, but of course its OKAY for you to present yourself as SINGLE and having women fawn all over you, business my a**!!!

 

Tameka, leave this loser!  Don't marry him, he's a cheater, he's cheated before and he'll do it again.  He most definitely has a double standard, and of course for Mr. Man whats good for the goose (himself) isn't good for the gander (Tameka). 

 

He's not worth it!

 
February 27, 2008, 2:14 pm CST

Leave him Tameka!

Tameka should "dump this chump" and find someone else that is going to respect her and treat her as an equal. I had a similar situation with my husband about two years ago being addicted to myspace. Every night as soon as he would get home from work he would say hi to the boys and automattically get on his myspace account. I got suspicious after so many of his friends on myspace were girls. There were a lot of inappropriate comments from them on his account. I got so suspicious about it that I didn't trust him which lead to me looking through the cell phone bill. Come to find out he had been calling one of his friends, which was a girl, from highschool that lives in a different state and talking for 30 minutes to and hour each time. I asked him about it and he shrugged it off. This is when I got nosey and broke into his myspace and email account and read all of her messages to him that he hadn't posted and the messages to her from him. Come to find out he was feeling like I didn't communicate with him and he didn't feel "loved". Thank god though that he did not do anything but talk on the phone and through the internet to her. I woke him up at 1:30 am after reading the emails and messages. I told him right there that he would either call her and tell her that he could not talk to her anymore or I would. He called her right then and put her on speaker and told her that he would not be able to communicate with her anymore. He also removed her from his myspace account. He also doesn't get on myspace but a couple of days a week now and only for a small amount of time. I have forgiven him for this but still check up on the phone calls and messages. Anyway Tameka, if this "chump" is going to cheat on you over and over again before you are married he is going to do it after. You seemed like a nice person on the Dr. Phil show and deserve better. If he has three myspace accounts and will not reduce it to only one he doesn't respect you. Also, he has the option of what comments he receives gets posted and if he is going to let the dirty and disrespectful ones post he doesn't respect or care about your feelings. Not to mention, if he won't even put a picture of you, your kids and your grandkids on his account he doesn't deserve you. He should be proud to be with you and want to tell the world and change his single status to in a relationship. I hope that you move on to better people and away from this jerk. Good luck in your life.

Texas Mommy2  

 
February 27, 2008, 2:19 pm CST

02/27 Internet Cheats

Quote From: housewife52

Well, I would not be comfortable with a situation like yours. I have been married for almost 34 years and I am truly not a jealous person. But, I would be jealous if my husband had a Myspace and denied me access and was flirting with other women. Period. I think, in a marriage, there are certain boundaries and rules. And some things are just not acceptable. And for me, this would be unacceptable.
     When I confronted him about it he says he's always been more confortable talking to women.  He denies flirting.  But I know better,  he thrives on the attention.
 
February 27, 2008, 2:24 pm CST

I caught a MySpace cheater too

I accidently found out that my sister-in-law was using MySpace to cheat on my brother.  I was shocked to learn about her activities and what she had exposed through MySpace to her children, including a profile
listing her marital status as 'single' and inappropriate content, such as sexual content and profanity.  By MySpace snooping, I validated that it was indeed her.  I was very concerned about the impact to the kids and told my brother.  I worked with MySpace to delete the underage MySpace account for my nephew (she had displayed as a friend) and to delete pornography from her 15 yr old daughter's page.  Yes, I snooped, but to protect the kids.  I have created a website  http://catchingcheaters.wetpaint.com to help others to learn about social networking sites and how to catch online cheaters, plus share experiences of such tragedies with each other.  I hope that you don't have this problem, but maybe this new site will help you if you do.  Please be kind with the site if you visit, it's a wiki and always under construction. : )
 
February 27, 2008, 2:25 pm CST

His Private Space

I have had a Internet profile for a couple of years.  The original reason for setting it up was to keep in touch with my family that lives out of state.  Since then I have come into contact with a few people that I went to school with.  It's very interesting sending messages back and forth,  finding out how one another's lives have turned out.  I have also accepted friends requests of people I don't know.  But we never disclose any personal information.  We just sent comments and short messages, like:  happy holidays, have a nice day.  General stuff like that.  I have never kept my profile or the password from my husband.  I don't have anything to hide.

  Well a few months ago my husband had me to help him create a profile.  I enjoyed working with him on it.  I actually thought it was a good thing that we could keep working together on.  Well at first it wasn't too bad.  Then he and one of his female friend began to get a little too friendly.  It may have been just joking,  but still, in my opinion it was inappropriate.  I explained to him how I felt. He told her that I was making him delete her. (He sounded like a scolded child). He has made other female friends since then.  He changed his password. He told me to stay out of his profile.  I have seen some of the comments he sends to them, like:  "SENDING YOU HUGS", "HELLO TO MY BEAUTIFUL FRIEND". Those are just the comments that he posts on some of their profiles.  Some of them I can't see, because their profile is set to private.  And their is no telling what they write back and forth in messages. 

  Some may think that I just sound like a jealous over bearing wife.  But he has cheated on me in the past with women from work, so it's not like he's not capable. 

  I believe that his only contact with these women has been online.  I just don't feel right about the fact that he has relationships with these women, (even if it is just online),  and he denies me access.

 
 
February 27, 2008, 2:37 pm CST

Re: This is me

I've been with my husband for sometime now even before internet came out. But online cheating is not right. But I wanted to say my husband has like to what I counted he has 7 messenger ID's in Yahoo and two in MSN. He is addicted to online chatting and watching these girls get down and dirty. I never had a problem with it but I do have a problem with him forgetting who I am.. So yeah internet sux... Hahaha but I have my fingers cross that it wont ruin my life.
 
February 27, 2008, 2:57 pm CST

No....

Quote From: sweetpea513

     He'll probably refuse to give me his password.  I've thought about hacking into it,  what do you think?

 

No. Hacking into myspace is illegal and you could get fined.  You're better off recognizing the "red flags".  If he did this once, he's probably doing it now.  I say move his butt out and find yourself someone who'll treat you better.

 
February 27, 2008, 3:04 pm CST

Good luck to you both.

Tameka, Dr P is right - either Keith changes, permanently, or you must walk away from him and not look back. You might want to talk to someone about why you're attracted to a cheater... God knows enough of us are! :

Keith, I hope you get into serious counseling and figure out why you are addicted to cheating. Otherwise, the only women who will really grab your attention are ... cheaters. With all the diseases out there including hepatitis, with all the critters like lice and chiggers, with enraged boyfriends of the women who are cheating with you, you could easily end up very sick, even dead, if you keep playing around.
 
February 27, 2008, 3:06 pm CST

should I be mad

I caught my boyfriend of two years talking sexually with another girl on the evil my space. He has never done anything like this before and swears its the last time. But I don't know if I should still be mad or just get over it cause it was only talk. Can anyone help shed some light on this for me?! Thank you
 
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