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Topic : 02/28 Still Chasing the Crown

Number of Replies: 130
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Created on : Friday, February 22, 2008, 12:14:23 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Little girls often dream of becoming Miss America, but sometimes these dreams don't end when they become adults. Dr. Phil's guests are mothers and wives who have an insatiable taste for the tiara. Angela has competed in five pageants and doesn't want to stop until she wins the big one. Her husband is sick and tired of the biz and says his wife is so obsessed with it, she wouldn't even let signs of a heart attack stop her from taking the stage! Angela says she only competes to support her charity, but her husband is not convinced. Then, Karen is a mother and wife who admits she is obsessed with winning and has competed in over 20 pageants. She's even skipped making two mortgage payments so she would have money for a pageant gown. And, Christi appeared on Dr. Phil a few years ago and was determined to become famous as an actress. She has now turned her acting dream into pageant pursuits. Christi is eight months pregnant with her seventh child, and her husband wants to know if he's being selfish by asking her to hang up her pageant heels to focus on the family. Plus, other queens get a chance to ask Dr. Phil their questions. Talk about the show here.

Find out what happened on the show.

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February 26, 2008, 4:15 am CST

what is the purpose of these pageants?

Quote From: momof4nhawaii

Not one of you posters above me has even seen the show. You are basing your entire opinion of these three women on a single paragraph written by people whose sole job it is to get you to watch the show. Think about that.

Why did they not get Mrs. America to appear? Or even a state titleholder? Any of the hundreds of women that compete and have supportive husbands (or have husbands that are also involved in judging, etc. themselves). How about Mrs. United States: a beautiful, accomplished woman and advocate for children with rare disorders? I'll tell you why...because these women would have put the world of Mrs. pageants in a positive light and that just doesn't make for good TV.
I would like to know what the purpose of these pageants is.  While it is commendable  that Mrs. United States is an advocate for children with rare disorders, it appears that the PRIMARY focus is still very shallow, because it is on physical appearance.  This is not to say that beautiful people don't have talent or advocate for good causes, but let's face it.  The most talented and altruistic 250 pound plain-faced woman is not going to be selected for any title, let alone allowed to compete in a contest  that is really about looks.
 
February 27, 2008, 1:54 pm CST

though partially true, it isn't all correct

Quote From: juliebgg

I would like to know what the purpose of these pageants is.  While it is commendable  that Mrs. United States is an advocate for children with rare disorders, it appears that the PRIMARY focus is still very shallow, because it is on physical appearance.  This is not to say that beautiful people don't have talent or advocate for good causes, but let's face it.  The most talented and altruistic 250 pound plain-faced woman is not going to be selected for any title, let alone allowed to compete in a contest  that is really about looks.
I have to agree with 85% of your perception on pageantry. Though not entirely correct.

There are pageants that exists and crown titleholders completely on their scholastic merits, their community service, or for their "platform" (the social issue they feel strongly about and work in during their time as Miss or Mrs whomever). Pageantry exists in plus sized form and many of those title holders are VERY active in their communitites also.  Pageants exist where you submit only a portfolio or resume of your achievements, and pageantry does exist where the most talented and altruistic 250 pound woman DOES win the pageant. It all depends on where you look.  Mrs United States, though I believe to be an absolutely beautiful woman in her own right, is not the cookie cutter mold of beauty, nor is she a size 2 like you may be picturing. I suggest you take a look at her online or find photos of her somewhere before you assume that all women in pageantry win mostly because they are pretty. I would also believe that most title holders in pagent systems that really work for community service and the betterment of others, not just pageants where they stand onstage to be judged in a gown and nothing more, would really be offended that you belittle their achievements because they are pretty.  MOST of the women you will find in pageantry, can live well rounded and successful lives, unlike those represented in the trailer for the show tomorrow, and are much more wonderful beyond the makeup and rhinestones and need nothing of the crown to prove how great they are. Many titleholders take the crown to use as a tool to, indeed, be active in their community and to open doors to opportunities that they may not have had to be active in an organization,  the way they would like to have been, without being able to get their foot in the door with a title or a pageant name. 

No one will really look twice at a stay at home mother of two wanting to help organize a large community service event quite as quicly as they would if she were to introduce herself as Mrs BLA BLA BLA , who's platform is to raise awareness for......  Pageantry for a lot of people really opens up doors.

But I can't lie, pageantry is also fun and a nice way to be able to celebrate yourself and feel pretty. Again, a housewife and mother of two mostly gets dirt and spit up on her shirts and pants, it isn't exactly a business suit, or evening gown kind of situation, but pageants can give you a week where gowns and pampering are exactly what you get. AND pageantry can give you a day every now and again where you get to enjoy a parade or event that gets you out and dressed up  to have fun or lets you feel good for contributing to your community beyond the home.

 Now before you go assuming that all women who are 200+ pounds etc don't get titles and can't achieve top titles in pageantry I, infact, happen to be a 220 pound, plain faced, etc who spent about 40 dollars on my evening gown, made my own talent outfit, and competed in an international pageant in 2006 and came home with the title. I have since been able to raise money and awareness for breast cancer and many other worthy causes and have had the chance to break the perceptions of pageantry.

Every organization and every interest has a bad apple in there. It doesn't mean that the whole tree is rotten.
Time to re-think your learned belief on this one.
 
February 27, 2008, 2:47 pm CST

Pagaent Power...

 

Of course, youre going to see all the bad apples on these shows that are obsessed wih this.  With a title comes power that people feel that they don't have already.  I can be a passionate supporter of research towards some disease, raise awareness and funds.  I don't need a title to become a spokeswoman for it ,I can create that power on my own. 

 

If women want to do pagaents, fine.  However, the women on the show are addicted to it and what good does all that power/attention do if your personal life goes to crap?

 
February 27, 2008, 3:20 pm CST

thanks for the clarification

Quote From: bananamuffin

I have to agree with 85% of your perception on pageantry. Though not entirely correct.

There are pageants that exists and crown titleholders completely on their scholastic merits, their community service, or for their "platform" (the social issue they feel strongly about and work in during their time as Miss or Mrs whomever). Pageantry exists in plus sized form and many of those title holders are VERY active in their communitites also.  Pageants exist where you submit only a portfolio or resume of your achievements, and pageantry does exist where the most talented and altruistic 250 pound woman DOES win the pageant. It all depends on where you look.  Mrs United States, though I believe to be an absolutely beautiful woman in her own right, is not the cookie cutter mold of beauty, nor is she a size 2 like you may be picturing. I suggest you take a look at her online or find photos of her somewhere before you assume that all women in pageantry win mostly because they are pretty. I would also believe that most title holders in pagent systems that really work for community service and the betterment of others, not just pageants where they stand onstage to be judged in a gown and nothing more, would really be offended that you belittle their achievements because they are pretty.  MOST of the women you will find in pageantry, can live well rounded and successful lives, unlike those represented in the trailer for the show tomorrow, and are much more wonderful beyond the makeup and rhinestones and need nothing of the crown to prove how great they are. Many titleholders take the crown to use as a tool to, indeed, be active in their community and to open doors to opportunities that they may not have had to be active in an organization,  the way they would like to have been, without being able to get their foot in the door with a title or a pageant name. 

No one will really look twice at a stay at home mother of two wanting to help organize a large community service event quite as quicly as they would if she were to introduce herself as Mrs BLA BLA BLA , who's platform is to raise awareness for......  Pageantry for a lot of people really opens up doors.

But I can't lie, pageantry is also fun and a nice way to be able to celebrate yourself and feel pretty. Again, a housewife and mother of two mostly gets dirt and spit up on her shirts and pants, it isn't exactly a business suit, or evening gown kind of situation, but pageants can give you a week where gowns and pampering are exactly what you get. AND pageantry can give you a day every now and again where you get to enjoy a parade or event that gets you out and dressed up  to have fun or lets you feel good for contributing to your community beyond the home.

 Now before you go assuming that all women who are 200+ pounds etc don't get titles and can't achieve top titles in pageantry I, infact, happen to be a 220 pound, plain faced, etc who spent about 40 dollars on my evening gown, made my own talent outfit, and competed in an international pageant in 2006 and came home with the title. I have since been able to raise money and awareness for breast cancer and many other worthy causes and have had the chance to break the perceptions of pageantry.

Every organization and every interest has a bad apple in there. It doesn't mean that the whole tree is rotten.
Time to re-think your learned belief on this one.
Thanks, bananamuffin for the clarification.  And congrats on your title.  I am sure it is well deserved.!!!! I am glad to hear that pageantry has evolved since the 60's and 70's where just about everyone could be a part of it if they want to. And it is about more than swimsuits and evening gowns.  Best of luck to you in your future.  Julie
 
February 28, 2008, 7:23 am CST

02/28 Still Chasing the Crown

Quote From: anders1ca

It is time to grow up and accept your family responsibilities you are too old to attract other men. 

Look after your children; they are your number one responsibility.  You are teaching them to become self admiring like yourself .

Live like a normal person and do not dwell so much on yourself.  It is hurting your children not to mention your husband.

To the Husband:
If my wife was so inconsiderate of the family, I would restrict her access to family funds.

Anders Roald Anderson
Ha....not sure if she works outside the home or not, but if she does, she might decide to stop depositing her "funds" into the "family funds". I don't necessarily agree with the pageant thing, however, I have hobbies, as does my husband, and there's not a man alive who is going to "restrict my access to family funds" if I'm the one helping put them there. Not in this lifetime.
 
February 28, 2008, 9:43 am CST

02/28 Still Chasing the Crown

Quote From: gwarrior6

 

Aren't these pagaents really expensive?  I'd be worried about taking food out of my childen's mouth or foreclosing on the house from so much debt.  And then you spend the time you would have had with your children on a pagaent.

 

I think there comes a point where you outgrow them.  They're fine when you're in your late teens and 20's, but when you start a career and a family, you get too old for that high school prom queen stuff.  It's a waste of my precious time, IMO, to parade around for approval I may or may not get.  I'm all for self-preservation, taking care of and pride in yourself, but I don't make it a full time hobby.

 

 

 

 

gwarrior, who is that in your posting picture?  That's not you, is it?  heh heh

 

And, are you the woman who was on "Wife Swap" and called herself "God Warrior"?

Just curious. 

 
February 28, 2008, 10:38 am CST

Nah...

Quote From: cndrlla

gwarrior, who is that in your posting picture?  That's not you, is it?  heh heh

 

And, are you the woman who was on "Wife Swap" and called herself "God Warrior"?

Just curious. 

 

That's Leslie, the cross-dressing bum looking rat-tabulous.  He's a local eccentric and icon (sort of like Mickey Mouse, everyone wants a pic with him).  He ran for mayor here a few times and came in second at least once.  He's actually pretty smart when he's sober.

 

I've never been on wife swap, I use g as either God-warrior or Girl warrior or even Gorgeous warrior-tee hee.  I couldn't make up my mind, so I settled on G-warrior. :)

 
February 28, 2008, 11:16 am CST

How sad that they feel unfulfilled...

Pagents are SO EXPENSIVE. Our daughter will be competing in a Miss Teen USA (local) pageant in April. She's a 13-yr-old going up against girls as old as 19. She's an Honors student who is also a star athlete. She altar serves at church, volunteers at Catholic charities, writes poetry beautifully and is just a super kid (if I may say so myself:).

 

We've told her she may "do" one pageant as a "gift" to her. It will be a wonderful childhood memory....a fun time where she can be in the spotlight and make new friends while having fun. She loves fashion and makeup (although she doesn't wear the latter to school).

 

The gowns cost hundreds and UP! The cocktail dresses cost hundrerds and UP! The swimsuits cost hundreds and UP! The rhinestones can cost over $100. The rhinestone heels can cost over $100 and usually 3 pairs are needed. Then you have to pay for headshots, get ads, buy tickets, buy makeup, get nails and feet done, get hair done, etc. It's COSTLY! And if you win, you need more of the same stuff for future engagements!!! It never ends!

 

Pageants are not only draining financially, they are time-consuming. Wouldn't they rather spend all that precious time with their wonderful, growing children and their wonderful, loving husbands? I'm very sad for them that they feel so unfulfilled....

 
February 28, 2008, 11:39 am CST

Missing the point

Quote From: momof4nhawaii

Not one of you posters above me has even seen the show. You are basing your entire opinion of these three women on a single paragraph written by people whose sole job it is to get you to watch the show. Think about that.

Why did they not get Mrs. America to appear? Or even a state titleholder? Any of the hundreds of women that compete and have supportive husbands (or have husbands that are also involved in judging, etc. themselves). How about Mrs. United States: a beautiful, accomplished woman and advocate for children with rare disorders? I'll tell you why...because these women would have put the world of Mrs. pageants in a positive light and that just doesn't make for good TV.
It's true that I haven't seen the show yet.  But I don't need to to understand what the basis of the show is all about.  There are some women that have valid and reasonable expectations towards winning pageants.  This show focuses on some that have unhealthy and unreasonable fixations on them, and have so far gone nowhere.  For the woman with 6 kids and one of the way, she is WAY OVERDUE on hangin it up.  And for the women who skipped two mortgage payments... that is UNEXCUSABLE!!!  That is a bad mother and a wife right there.  So I have nothing against the women who actually make it to the Miss America and all that.  But the ones who keep coming back year after year and never win, and have families to support, those ones are the problems.  They need to get their priorities straight in life.
 
February 28, 2008, 12:29 pm CST

These Stepford Wives are SCAAARRRYYY!!!!

These women are frightening. They look, talk, act and dress like over-the-hill dolls.  I though Dr Phil made a v. good point when one said she just does this or charity and he showed that if she just donated all the money she put into this ridiculous crap she would be living a lot MORE to charity. 

 

She doesn't do this for charity she does this for attention.  How sad she is so insecure she has have a sparkly crown and have little catfights with other contestants in order to feel superiour.  I'm so thankful that I already feel secure, fabulous and wonderful and I don't have to lose all my money and self-respect just for some attention.

 

I think people that live beyond their means are missing some common sense and when they drag their families into the gutter with them they are being selfish. 

 

The mother that would rather spend money and time on her pageants than her children should never have had any!  I'm surprised she didn't pop out limited edition Barbie's instead of kids (that probably would have made her happier)

 
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