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Topic : 02/29 Follow-Ups

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Created on : Friday, February 22, 2008, 12:19:18 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
After six seasons and over 1,000 shows under his belt, Dr. Phil has met many memorable people. Today, he follows up with some of his most-talked-about guests. Rochelle and her husband, John, first met Dr. Phil nine years ago, when she became the poster child for controlling wives. She tracked John's soda intake, told him how to hold utensils and didn't want him to sweat while he slept. You won't believe the new demand Rochelle has for her husband! And, hear her message for all women who criticize her controlling ways. Next, the Dr. Phil staff traveled thousands of miles to the jungles of a third-world country in search of Mollie and Allene, who were taken by their father a year prior. Both girls were returned to their mother. Find out which daughter chose to return to the German Baptist lifestyle with her father and why the other is having a difficult time adjusting to her new way of life. Then, Shawn had earned one million dollars and spent it all. He was in debt almost $750,000 when his fiancée turned him in to Dr. Phil. Did he sell off his prized possessions, and did he and his fiancée finally tie the knot? Plus, 10 years ago, Jo Ann was struggling with the unsolved murder of her 18-year-old daughter. When she met with Dr. Phil during his appearance on Oprah, she revealed her plan to take her life. See how she's doing today and the surprises Dr. Phil has in store for her! Join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

February 26, 2008, 4:14 am CST

02/29 Follow-Ups

Quote From: janes518

I TOO WOULD LIKE TO SEE THE "FAMILY".  I THOUGHT IT WAS ALEX WITH DARK HAIR.  IF NOT, WHERE WAS SHE????  HAVE ALWAYS BEEN INTERESTED TO SEE A FOLLOW UP WITH THEIR LIVES.  ALSO STACI AND CHRIS.........................ARE THEY STILL TOGETHER??  ALEX, CATHERINE, MARTY AND ERIN WERE A PART OF DR. PHIL FOR MONTHS AND MONTHS AND WE DESERVE MORE THAN A QUIP SHOWING THEM, MINUS ALEX (I GUESS)

Do we really DESERVE more? I am curious about Alex also, but I can accept that she may not want us to be a part of her life anymore. She was very young when she first came on the show. She has probably changed a lot one way or another, and I respect her privacy.

 
February 26, 2008, 10:32 am CST

02/29 Follow-Ups

Quote From: janes518

I TOO WOULD LIKE TO SEE THE "FAMILY".  I THOUGHT IT WAS ALEX WITH DARK HAIR.  IF NOT, WHERE WAS SHE????  HAVE ALWAYS BEEN INTERESTED TO SEE A FOLLOW UP WITH THEIR LIVES.  ALSO STACI AND CHRIS.........................ARE THEY STILL TOGETHER??  ALEX, CATHERINE, MARTY AND ERIN WERE A PART OF DR. PHIL FOR MONTHS AND MONTHS AND WE DESERVE MORE THAN A QUIP SHOWING THEM, MINUS ALEX (I GUESS)

Dr. Phil has already done quite a few updates on this family already and they seem to be doing great.  What more can you guys possibly want to know?  Now, I do agree with those of you who want to see the other family with the woman who claims to be mormon and was cheating.  I think Dr. Phil forgot about that one.
 
February 27, 2008, 9:30 am CST

02/29 Follow-Ups

Quote From: a_mayost

Dr. Phil has already done quite a few updates on this family already and they seem to be doing great.  What more can you guys possibly want to know?  Now, I do agree with those of you who want to see the other family with the woman who claims to be mormon and was cheating.  I think Dr. Phil forgot about that one.
During all the pre-1000th show hype, promising up-dates on Dr Phil's most memorable guests, they kept showing flashbacks of this family during their original appearances. So, why wouldn't we expect another update? And, during the 1000th show, they also showed these same flashbacks. What's the point in showing flashbacks of quests,  without another update?
 
February 27, 2008, 10:27 pm CST

The couple Dr. Phil was off the mark with that I'd LOVE an update on NOW

Is the show he did a few years ago with Deanna & Mike.  The guy would would tell his wife how to take a shower & how to brusher her teeth!  Ther were many who felt this guy was some narcissistic manic & that' Dr. Phil was WAy to easy on him!  This was the guy who had been telling his wife to "shut your pie hole" and the kids would "cower" in the corner when dad was coming home.  

 

 

I don't think Dr. Phil was up on narcissists back then & was a therapist that was taken in by this guy.  it isn't until the cameras are shut off that they'll go back to their "true ways" & this guy was REAL pissed at all the people from the message boards telling his wife to "RUN, RUN, RUN Deanna" & so was doing the "turn around to prove the message board wrong.  Frankly I can't imagine it lasted long & imagine he'd resort back to his REAL colors before too long.  I'd LOVE to see where Deanna is now & if she finally got rid of him.  I hope those kids were finally able to get out from under their father's tirades. 

 
February 27, 2008, 10:36 pm CST

02/29 Follow-Ups

Quote From: housewife52

One couple that I wonder about is Jeffrey and Jennifer. Jeffrey was very controlling and had cameras everywhere in the house and worked at home making mascot costumes I think? The last time I heard anything Jeffrey was in jail.

I believe Jeffery is stuck in VA because he's on parole & he's not to near Jennifer either.  I think they're suppose to talk visitation with kids after that time but I'm not to sure.   I believe Jennifer is with family & friends in an undisclosed state "in hiding".  I can't say how because I wouldn't want to give it away (she's in hiding) but I do have a very small glimpse of her life from afar every now & then.  She seems happy & relaxed in her life & like she's a working mom with a real life now.    I've seen a pic. or 2 & she always has a smile now.  head & showlders above the old pic with her hubby & her child that looked like he was clingying in fear to her. 

 

 

Dr. Phil had done a follow up on her a few months back & had her speak real quick though a web cam or some thing like that & she said she was doing much better and was real happy.  She didn't wish her ex ill will but just wanted him to let her have a normal life now.  etc. etc.  I have a feeling at the 2 year mark it'll open a whole new can of worms. 

 
February 28, 2008, 6:51 am CST

Good to know....

Quote From: momakababe

I believe Jeffery is stuck in VA because he's on parole & he's not to near Jennifer either.  I think they're suppose to talk visitation with kids after that time but I'm not to sure.   I believe Jennifer is with family & friends in an undisclosed state "in hiding".  I can't say how because I wouldn't want to give it away (she's in hiding) but I do have a very small glimpse of her life from afar every now & then.  She seems happy & relaxed in her life & like she's a working mom with a real life now.    I've seen a pic. or 2 & she always has a smile now.  head & showlders above the old pic with her hubby & her child that looked like he was clingying in fear to her. 

 

 

Dr. Phil had done a follow up on her a few months back & had her speak real quick though a web cam or some thing like that & she said she was doing much better and was real happy.  She didn't wish her ex ill will but just wanted him to let her have a normal life now.  etc. etc.  I have a feeling at the 2 year mark it'll open a whole new can of worms. 

 

I remember Jennifer/Jeffrey, I'm so glad that creep is out of their lives.  I hope that she carries mace, a gun, or some way to protect herself, as restraining orders don't mean that much anymore. 

 

I agree with your first post BTW,about the narcissism.  NPD-ers change VERY slowly, if at all, making therapy with them frustrating because  they don't see themselves as the problem.  I hope Deanna stays away from him at least until he finishes his therapy, which may not be for many years.  The bully husband from last week did the same "message board" game, as if he could convince us that he wasn't the problem. 

 

 

 

 
February 28, 2008, 12:19 pm CST

I have wondered if Mike & Deanna was Dr. Phil's education

Quote From: gwarrior6

 

I remember Jennifer/Jeffrey, I'm so glad that creep is out of their lives.  I hope that she carries mace, a gun, or some way to protect herself, as restraining orders don't mean that much anymore. 

 

I agree with your first post BTW,about the narcissism.  NPD-ers change VERY slowly, if at all, making therapy with them frustrating because  they don't see themselves as the problem.  I hope Deanna stays away from him at least until he finishes his therapy, which may not be for many years.  The bully husband from last week did the same "message board" game, as if he could convince us that he wasn't the problem. 

 

 

 

into the world of abusers & particularly narcissists.   A narcissist can and does go to therapy/counsling & they "learn from it" how to manipulate *better*.  They can start to abuse & still "look like a great guy.  At the time there were many people coming on line just like they did the other day (or maybe last week) when it was that woman Karen with her husband.  Dr. Phil had called that senaro for Karen and her abuseive husband exactly what it was and he had the effects of the abusive narcissist on it's victim/prey.  He had the "why they stay" & how it's gradual & escalates etc.  But back when it was Deanna & Mike IMO it went very different & frankly I thought Dr. Phil was another counselor/therapist who'd been taken by a narcissistic abuser.  *they always have to be right* & if there is something they are doing wrong it's because *someone else made them do that*. 

 

I'm going to give you the links to the shows so you can read a bit for yourself the basics of what went on.  A big note here is that Deanna says she hates the look in her sons eyes when he knows he's going to get in trouble, but the recap does not recall the sons *anxiety* knowing his father was on his way home from work!  This is why Dr. Phil brings Robin on stage to speak of how she feels about "home life" & she speaks of how when Phil is home then it feels "completel" because all are there.  Deanna & her son would be feeling anxious & on edge as they knew Dad was on his way home & I believe her son would be going and sitting some where nearly catatonic.  Here's the link for the first show

 

http://www.drphil.com/shows/show/482

 

 

In the second show they say that they split after they went home from the first show & Mike had gone back to live with his mom.....   as you read through take note how all you hear is him speak about himself.......  "During that time I spent at my mother's house, I realized how much I missed my family"    It was Dr. Phil who'd pointed out in the earlier show that Mike acts the way he does because of the way he was brought up & (like most therapists in counseling a narcissist) gives him the theory & vocabulary to benefit him & so mike is able to shift the blame & of course is careful not to say this was *the only reason* but he says  "He realized that his parental legacy played a part in the way he treated his wife"  The term "parental legacy" came from Dr. Phil.

 

While Mike "looks to change" all he is doing really is changing his tactics.  His concern isn't how he treats his wife or even his kid.  He didn't see his wife with respect in that she just doesn't do  things the same way as him & still sees her as "inferior" but doesn't give into the "urge to correct her". 

To quote him from the 2nd show

"The couple decided that Mike would move back in. "As soon as I came home, I decided that some of my ways weren't working," he says."

 

I guess now that *he decided* his ways weren't working then it really was the case?  I mean prior to that with someone else saying this to him it was all in question?  And what about what Deanna had "decided"?  And now this was the "honeymoon phase" that many abuse victims experience when the abuser feels they need to change a stradige.  They will change things *for the time being* So they are looking great again & RIGHT.  Everything he saiys is I I I I me, me, me, I missed them, I did this, I did that,  in true narcissistic fashing it was *all about him*. 


The whole time they were on the 2nd show was basically on *Mike's* accomplishments And he didn't do any of this because he of his wife & son but when everyone on the *message baords* reemed him a new one he took the position OF THE VICTIM (classic for an abuser) & sets out to "prove them wrong"  & THAT is what the show was for!  It was the show of "You're wrong I'm right"  aimed at the people on the message board from a narcissist!  They are not ever wrong.....  here are his words from the next link I'll give you.

 

"I couldn't believe that anybody would think that about me. It hurt my feelings very bad. There was some good that came out of that because I was bound and determined to prove they're wrong."

 

Notice how  he wasn't concerned about loosing his family as people were urging Deanna to leave but how he was "very distraught that people would even say half of those things. These people depicted me as a villain.  I couldn't believe anyone would think that about me"   So he couldn't imagine telling his wife he's the "king of the castle & when she's told to shut her pie whole she should just do it" would make him look like a villian?  It wasn't "his words" that depicted him that way just all the people online!  LOL  THAT is a narcissist..........  never their fault & the blame is always passed onto others............. 

 

"the good that came from it" wasn't his family in a better place but all of the accomplishements *he's made*

 

Deanna as most victims of abuse had taken him back in & was defending him & this is actually very common with abusive marriage.   It makes it even more painful for the victim because if the "villian" was just a villian all the time it would be easier to think of him/her that way, but when they throw a bone to the victim every once in a while it gives that glimmer of hope that "maybe he can be that person I really love".   It's just part of the dynamics you know?  Deanna was confused at the time & thought that just because life hadn't "been like this for 9 years" it really hadn't beenlike that.  it was like that she just didn't see it escalating.    abusers can be very smooth when they want to be. 

 

There were many that just like we worried for Jennifer we all worried for Deanna.  That last show was in 2006 & now it's 2008 & I have to wonder if Dr. Jekyle hasn't turned back into Mr. Hyde.  And if Dr. Phil had started to check into some of the things that people were trying to educate with right here on the message boards & realized that the narcissist is a whole different thing when it comes to therapy.  I don't believe that any of the reference material was on his site back then like it is now......   Now he comes right out & says that the chances of changing a narcissist is next to nothing & that's because he knows it's true......  not because the people on the message boards are just being meanies.....   Now you'll hear Dr. Phil tell those viewers who use the message boards "We want to hear from you & know what you think".  We can all learn things when we're listening & on our toes...  

 

Anyway here is the link to the piece on the 2nd show. 

 

I'd love to know where these people are now & how things are going.  

 

 

 

 

 
February 28, 2008, 1:54 pm CST

Thanks...

 

Thanks, momakababe,

 

 
February 28, 2008, 4:31 pm CST

02/29 Follow-Ups

I saw the show with jennifer and Jeffrey. I hope when she got the devorice that she had a no contact order put up against her ex-husband. If I was her I would be packing a firearm and some peperspray, I hope she and her children are doing well in what ever state they are living in.
 
February 29, 2008, 6:31 am CST

02/29 Follow-Ups

I am curious about one thing. Since Rochelle has removed all of John's external genitalia, how does he urinate? I guess that answers the question as to why they have no children. He has the patience of Job.
 
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