Topic : 03/03 Teens and Sex with Bishop T.D. Jakes

 

It's wrong to keep people ignorant of their own bodies.  Sex ed is a must, but also keep that ongoing talk and expand on it as they grow.  Teens are going to have sex, it's pretty much a rule.  I'd like to think that knowledge is protection.  Doesn't the pastor want kids to be protected?  HIV/AIDS, Hepatitis, and Syphilis are 10x more horrible than premarital sex.   It's preventable if they have the info- and there is a myriad of it now- and info is control, control is empowerment. 

 

I don't think the stigmatization of virginity is fair, either.  You can focus sexual energy into immense productivity, which can help achieve your goals.   But it should be a personal, private, informed choice, not something you swear to in public.  It can be a beautiful, spiritual thing if it's kept a personal matter, IMO.  Don't share your sex status with a fundamentalist, NEVER a good idea....

 

If you only give them the "no sex" option and no education, they are going to learn it from someone.  Would parents rather have their kids learn it from each other?  Worse, learn how it's "evil" from some fundamentalist that probably barely knows what it is to begin with?   It's important to have a continuous all-inclusive, open discussion regardless of whether they choose to have sex or not.

 

Teen girls need to know how to take care of themselves with yearly gynecological visits, to catch Cervical, Ovarian, or other anomalies (cancer) early, as well as obtaining antibiotics/antivirals for STDs, condom use, signs of breast CA, etc.  It's a health issue more than anything else, and teaching teens to be responsible IS responsible parenting.

 

I don't think one should invite a pastor in to control your kid's sex education.  They should get the facts from the parents or the school or even a perspective on it, but I think it's a private thing.   Trying to get facts from a biased source isn't a great idea....

 

       When I was in school, we did not have sex education.  We had something better.  One day an obstetrician, a doctor who specializes in childbirth, gave us a lecture and answered the questions we had the nerve to ask him in a co-ed setting.

       He told us that there are times in our lives when we need a professional.  For this reason, I do not believe that schools have any business practicing medicine.  A 13-year-old girl has a big problem when she is pregnant.  I remember the doctor explaining that young girls have a difficult time carrying a pregnancy to term.  "The worst thing that can happen is not having a baby, it is suddenly not having a baby."  One of the boys asked him for further clarification.  And, we all learned that the miscarriage rate is much higher for girls under 16. 

     I personally knew a 13-year-old who discovered she was pregnant.  Her "boyfriend" told her to wait before she told her parents.  And, two months later, she had a miscarriage.  She was relieved, and happy.  She thought she had been unbelievably lucky.

    Two weeks later, she developed a raging fever--over 105 degrees.  The emergency room doctor asked her if she wanted to live.  "Then, tell me the truth:  Have you been pregnant?"  It was all she could do to force herself to nod yes.  And then he went into the waiting room, explaining to her mortified parents that either they would agree to an emergency hysterectomy, or he would be forced to obtain a court order.  (Their daughter would be dead by morning without the operation)

   No parents should have to face something like this.  It is almost cruel.

   Her "boyfriend?"  He was her 37-year-old married uncle, and their "affair" had been going on since she was five.

    

 I wish every parnet would read Girls Gone Mild by Wendy Shalit, who happens to be Jewish so we can't bash evangelicals here.  This book is eye opening regarding how messed up we've become with sex and sexual messages.  Before we start this sex no sex debate perhaps we need to take a look at the prevailing attitudes in our society, what they say about us and the 'logical' conclusions our teens often come to based on those attitudes.

 

    Life is tough enough without adding adult decisions before you are one.  If virginity is a choice, it should be a private choice.  Swearing in public to remain a virgin until marriage . . . is tactless and distasteful. 

     You are right.  Fundamentalists do not take this kind of information, well.   They tend to forget that Christ himself said, "Go, and sin no more."  And worse, some of them forget the passage "judge not, least ye be judged."

      My mother dragged my sister into the guidance office with the girls in my class.  She knew that I had ceased to be a virgin when I was 17.  My mother proclaimed this before my classmates.  She also proclaimed that my younger sister was not the "same kind of girl" that I was.  My sister was a sweet, pure little virgin.  She would never do anything wrong.

      And, my mother went on and on and on and on and on.  It was her Christian duty.

 

     

And Bishop D Doctor Jakes Phil Sex Teens T With. Well Well Well here we go again another round with----

Pastor Jake. When will it all end? I do not know. See you on Monday March 03rd, 2008. Sincerley Your.------

Russell Vlaanderen.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The wording of the promo  doesn't sound  quite right.  Sex with T D Jakes...should have been worded differently.

 I AM A PARENT WHO SENT MY DAUGHTER TO A PRIVATE CHRISTIAN HIGH SCHOOL AND THEY TAUGHT ABSTINENCE. A CROCK! 7TH GRADER PREGNANT BY A 12TH GRADER. THOUGH SOME MAY WANT TO ABSTAIN OTHER'S SHOULD BE GIVEN THE INFORMATION THEMSELVES, TO MAKE THE CHOICE. TEENS WILL EVEN HAVE ANAL SEX TO SAY THEY ARE STILL VIRGINS. GIVE ORAL SEX. ANYTHING BUT VAGINAL SEX TO SAY THEY ARE  STILL VIRGINS.. I FEEL IT IS UP TO THE PARENTS IN ANY TYPE OF SCHOOL TO TELL THE CHILD ABOUT SEX. IF A STUDENT ASKED ME FOR A CONDOM I WOULD GO BUY THEM. BETTER SAFE THEN SORRY. WHAT I SAID TO MY DAUGHTER WAS:   IF YOU THINK YOU ARE READY FOR SEX, KNOW WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT, ORGASM'S, BLOWJOBS, O R U GOING TO SWALLOW. SOME SAY ONCE BUT MEN WANT IT ALL THE TIME. BY THE WAY YOU SHOULD GET A VIBRATOR TO SEE IF YOU MISSED THE ORGASM DUE TO BOTH SHOULD PLEASURE. I WAS SO BLUNT I TOLD HER THAT WHEN A WOMAN HAS SEX MOM'S CAN TELL CAUSE THE GIRL'S WILL WALK DIFFERENT, SHE BELEIVED ME AND SO DID HER FRIENDS. I TALKED ABOUT EVEYTHING. OMG YOU HAD SEX WITH MARY WELL MARY HAD SEX WITH JOE AN  JOE HAD SEX WITH HEATHER AND WOW DO YOU REALLY KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE YOU HAVE HAD SEX WITH. WELL I TOLD MY DAUGHTER THAT IF SHE WAS READY I WOULD TAKE HER TO OUR DOCTOR OR THERE IS SUCH A PLACE CALLED PLANNED PARENTHOOD. PLEASE USE THESE PLACES FOR SUCH AS STD'S AIDS. ECT. BUT IF YOU ARE READY I CAN'T STOP YOU BUT I CAN PREPARE YOU. MOST KIDS IN HIGH SCHOOL WILL NEVER FORGET MY OPENNESSS CAUSE THE SCHOOL TAUGHT ABSTINENCE. SHAME BUT WHERE ARE THE PARENTST IN THIS. TALK TO YOUR KIDS THEY WANT TO KNOW. I SAVED ALOT OF KIDS WENT TO SCHOOL EVERYDAY AS A VOLUNTEER SINCE PRE-SCHOOL TO 11TH GRADE. THEY FOUND OUT I HAD SPOKEN TO A STUDENT ABOUT HER ACTIONS NOT MINE. GAVE HER WISDOM AND ADVISE AND WAS ASKED TO LEAVE THE GODLY HOUSE THAT GIRL WAS PREGNANT IN A FEW MONTHS. I LEFT STILL TEACHING MY DAUGHTER AND ALL HER FRIENDS FROM SCHOOL LOTS CAME OVER ON WEEKENDS. WE HAD DISCUSSIONS WITH CONSEQUENCES OF BEHAVIOR. THOSE PARTICULAR KIDS ARE 26-28 AND ARE NOT MARRIED, ENGAGED SOME TO BE MARRIED, NOT PREGNANT WITH CHILDREN NO HUSBAND. I MUST SAY HONESTY IS THE ONY WAY TO TALK TO A TEEN. VERY FEW DOES THAT PROGRAM WORK BUT THEY THINK IT 'S GOD'S WAY WELL TEACH BOTH THEY NEED THE EDUCATION IF NOT IN SCHOOL . ...... PARENT'S STEP UP SAVE YOU CHILD. TEACH TEACH THEM WELL. NOT A GRANDMA YET, TAUGHT MY DAUGHTER WELL W/O SCHOOL. AND TO MAKE HER OWN CHOICES BUT THESE ARE YOUR OPPORTUNITIES AND THE CONSEQUENCES OF YOU ACTIONS SO IT'S REALLY UP TO YOU. MY DAUGHTER FLURISHED DURING 11TH AN 12TH GRADE, CAME INTO HER SELF. I AM A PROUD MOTHER OF MANY MANY CHILDREN  1 MNE THE OTHER 200 YOUR'S.

Unfortunately we live in an age where pre marital sex is approved of.  The acceptable peer pressure of the time is " try out the merchandise before you get married". I don't know how many times i've heard this phrase over the years. In years gone by the peer pressure was those who did such were shunned.

Today there are many other problems that must be faced such as HIV, AIDS. It's time for the morality of this nation to turn around and stand up for what morally right. Diseases like aids and HIV show how the

steady moral decline of this nation and  it is now reaping the fruits of what it's sowed for many years. The only way to eradicate such diseases is to be tested fore such diseases before marriage and to abstain until marriage. Until the morality of this nation improves these diseases will always be a problem.