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Topic : 03/18 Love Junkies

Number of Replies: 98
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Created on : Friday, March 14, 2008, 02:37:04 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Are you in love with being in love? Do you jump from relationship to relationship because you can’t stand the thought of being single? Dr. Phil’s first guest, Dawn, says she definitely fits this description. The 42-year-old says she’s been hopping from guy to guy since she was 14, has been married and divorced four times and is now in a three-year relationship and feeling the itch. Dawn’s current boyfriend, Paul, feels like he's being used and says he’s not ready to be her fifth ex-husband! Kurtis, Dawn’s 22-year-old son, says it’s high time his mom settled down. Is Paul really Dawn's true love or should he pack his things and hit the road? Then, Joanne says her cousin, Theresa, is obsessed with her boyfriend, Ken. Joanne and Theresa’s sister, Christine, say Ken is mentally abusive, but no matter what he does, Theresa keeps going back for more. They say Ken threw Theresa, her kids and all their belongings out on the front yard for the entire neighborhood to see, and she still took him back. Joanne and Christine aren’t the only ones who dislike Ken. Theresa’s mom says she can’t stand him either -- to the point where she hasn’t spoken to her daughter in nearly two years! Theresa says she just can’t live without her man, and her relatives will have to deal with their relationship. Don’t miss Dr. Phil’s plan for mending this broken family and talk about the show here.

Find out what happened on the show.

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March 18, 2008, 4:13 pm CDT

03/18 Love Junkies

Quote From: cuzican927

Why are men mentally/emotionally abusive? Reading this site-I thought I knew 2 of them--only to find it's a huge problem in todays society.

 Is it a bully thing?

Is it a to be a guy thing? 

Is it a guilt trip thing?   

How do we change todays boys into tomorrows men?

    The only answer for your last question that I can come up with is to work diligently on the younger generations to change attitudes. I think the problem stems from old old attitudes that are very slow to die. Basically that a  woman's purpose is to meet a man's needs and to please him. If she  doesn't,  he is entitled to "straighten her out"or "show her who wears the pants." I think that way of thinking  is fading but very very slowly..........
 
March 18, 2008, 4:15 pm CDT

03/18 Love Junkies

Quote From: justme245

 Dr. Phil, are you kidding me?  This woman is obviously suffering from no self-esteem.  She has been taken care of so much she doesn't have any strength in herself.  My advise is that she should be single, no dating for one year.  She needs to learn to be alone and take care of herself.  Her fear of being abandonded is screaming so loudly it overpowers her ability to hear that great guy telling her that she is loved.  .... and yes I'm divorced, for 10 years.  And would just jump out of my skin if I could find someone that would be so  loving and attentive to me.  Right now she just needs to heal herself, and if I could give advise to the guy... run don't walk there are a lot of good women out here that would love to meet someone so nice.

Well said!

 
March 18, 2008, 4:42 pm CDT

Dr. Phil, you nailed it!

Today's first half of the show was really interesting to me because I have been in Paul's shoes.  A decade ago, I met a wonderful man in his early 40's that had never been married and his longest relationship had been 3 years - same average years as Dawn's relationships.  As a little boy, he,  too, had the same foot problem as Dawn and had been hospitalized for treatments for long periods of time.  Deep in my heart I knew this experience had scared him emotionally and could of been the reason he sabotaged his relationships.   With me, he broke the 3-year record; we were together for 7 years, but eventually I needed a commitment.  In turn, he asked for a 50-page paper from me stating the meaning of marriage - I got the U-Haul.  I saw this request as his way of dancing around commitment.  Sometimes, we have to acknowledge that there are things beyond our control and move on.  Best of luck to Paul and even Dawn - maybe you can offer her the help she needs to help her get over the pain.

 
March 18, 2008, 4:53 pm CDT

"JUST A THOUGHT"

 

    Hello;

  When I heard the girls talk about their relation ships not lasting,

 and also I kept hearing them say they have never been on their

 own. I have been in some relationship's, but I was a codependent.

  I took a lot of abuse from different guts just for a place to live.

  I could not have real feeling for them due to the abuse. Also

 in my situation, I feel some of them also I felt when they wanted

  sex, that was a lot of it. And sometimes just could not do it just

 because it was more a duty. And after you are abused in any

 way, how can you have feelings. The worst position that any

 women can be in is a co-dependent relationship. That is just

 my view. I got some negative feed back about what I wrote on

 the 17th of March. I have been in some difficult relationships

 I would either be alone then to be living a life of shame.

 
March 18, 2008, 5:27 pm CDT

GOD!!!

WOW who knew that relationships were complicated. This two ladies have had something in their past to make them have complicated relationships. They don't seems to be bad women, but they need to be aware that they are hurting their famalies and themselves

 
March 18, 2008, 5:28 pm CDT

03/18 Love Junkies

They jst need professtional help and change their perception of love and relatiosships and change their out look on lives
 
March 18, 2008, 5:31 pm CDT

Ken and Theresa-just like me!

I have been off and on with an abusive partner like Theresa. I have also thrown him out and then asked him to come back, felt sorry for him, given him a soft place to land although he has never given me anything in return but more abuse. He is out now and refusing to get treatment so I don't think it will ever work out. The problem is that I'm pregnant and he keeps promising to get help. I keep giving him chances in the hope that we could somehow provide a family for the baby. What Dr. Phil said, something like "You should be kicking down the door to get OUT, not back in," really hit me hard. I'm enabling him to exist in this world without getting help, so why should he?

This show opened my eyes!

 
March 18, 2008, 5:44 pm CDT

Great Message

WoW! Todays show should open everyone's eyes! I believe that everyone in a committed relationship has said to their partner or at least themselves that they miss the 'honeymoon phase'... Well how true was it when Dr. Phil said that what Dawn was missing was what is one the other side of that high. It doesn't peak and then start going down, it just changes... There are still highs but what she was missing was the security of knowing that she belonged Somewhere WITH Somebody! Its the feeling that if ya don't show up somewhere there is someone in this world that would miss you, would look for you, and would care that you weren't were you were suppose to be. You have a sense of belonging, a sense of value, and a sense of contribution.  We need to realize that our husbands and wives don't love us any less it just CHANGES!!! So let's appreciate our companionship and be grateful that we do have someone that will love us, worry about us, and value us even if they didn't hold our hand that evening or give us a hug when we think they should have!! Accept change and for once lets take our marriages as serious as the vows we took!!!!!

 
March 18, 2008, 5:58 pm CDT

03/18 Love Junkies

Quote From: debeauvoir

I have been off and on with an abusive partner like Theresa. I have also thrown him out and then asked him to come back, felt sorry for him, given him a soft place to land although he has never given me anything in return but more abuse. He is out now and refusing to get treatment so I don't think it will ever work out. The problem is that I'm pregnant and he keeps promising to get help. I keep giving him chances in the hope that we could somehow provide a family for the baby. What Dr. Phil said, something like "You should be kicking down the door to get OUT, not back in," really hit me hard. I'm enabling him to exist in this world without getting help, so why should he?

This show opened my eyes!

You should run while you still can
 
March 18, 2008, 6:18 pm CDT

It's not cruelty, it's sadism

Children who bully in schools are not just cruel, they are sadistic. They derive pleasure in the suffering they inflict on others. Dawn is a result of schools that allow bullies to prey on the insecure. Schools need to stop bullies now, not say the bullies are going through a period, not say that it's part of growing up.

 

Children who abuse other children, have the mental mindset for growing up to become abusers. Nobody should have to be terrified of going to school. Put these sadists where they belong, in juvenile hall, or a specialized school where they can try to survive with their own. Maybe after being targeted they'll learn a lesson about what they do to others. Monsters don't deserve an education.

 
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