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Topic : 03/18 Love Junkies

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Created on : Friday, March 14, 2008, 02:37:04 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Are you in love with being in love? Do you jump from relationship to relationship because you can’t stand the thought of being single? Dr. Phil’s first guest, Dawn, says she definitely fits this description. The 42-year-old says she’s been hopping from guy to guy since she was 14, has been married and divorced four times and is now in a three-year relationship and feeling the itch. Dawn’s current boyfriend, Paul, feels like he's being used and says he’s not ready to be her fifth ex-husband! Kurtis, Dawn’s 22-year-old son, says it’s high time his mom settled down. Is Paul really Dawn's true love or should he pack his things and hit the road? Then, Joanne says her cousin, Theresa, is obsessed with her boyfriend, Ken. Joanne and Theresa’s sister, Christine, say Ken is mentally abusive, but no matter what he does, Theresa keeps going back for more. They say Ken threw Theresa, her kids and all their belongings out on the front yard for the entire neighborhood to see, and she still took him back. Joanne and Christine aren’t the only ones who dislike Ken. Theresa’s mom says she can’t stand him either -- to the point where she hasn’t spoken to her daughter in nearly two years! Theresa says she just can’t live without her man, and her relatives will have to deal with their relationship. Don’t miss Dr. Phil’s plan for mending this broken family and talk about the show here.

Find out what happened on the show.


 
cndrlla
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March 18, 2008, 10:10 am PDT

03/18 Love Junkies

I find it hard to understand why we women are so willing to accept such inferior and destructive men just to avoid being alone!

 

I have written several articles on the subjects in today's show and I'd like to share them with those who may possibly find some encouragement from them.

www.nononsensegrammytree.blogspot.com

 Relevant articles are in the January posts: "Maya Angelou's Best Poem Ever", "But I Love Him", Even A Turtle...." Sex and the Single Mom" and "In-Laws...And Outlaws."
 
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cndrlla
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March 18, 2008, 10:29 am PDT

03/18 Love Junkies

Quote From: cuzican927

Why are men mentally/emotionally abusive? Reading this site-I thought I knew 2 of them--only to find it's a huge problem in todays society.

 Is it a bully thing?

Is it a to be a guy thing? 

Is it a guilt trip thing?   

How do we change todays boys into tomorrows men?

Good question.

 

"We" can't change today's boys into tomorrow's men unless "we" are their Mother or father.

 

It starts by being responsible with our own selves, not having babies when we are too young to know how to raise them right....or, if we do, making sure we find the resources to help us along the way....and then, making our children our top priority, no matter what!! 

 

If we are single Mothers, we don't allow a boyfriend...or even a new husband...to take over our job. We make our sons accountable, teach them respect, EARN their respect as their Mother by not falling into addictions, whatever form those addictions take...being a good example, and teaching them how to treat women. As Mothers, we don't accept excuses for unacceptable behavior from our sons, and we teach our daughters love and respect for themselves and not to settle for anything less than what they deserve from a future partner!

 

We stay strong; we don't take the "easy" way out by letting some ignorant fool of a man near us or our children just so we won't have to go out into the cold, hard world and earn a living for ourselves and our children.

 

I've been there; I know what I'm talking about. It was hard raising my son and two daughters alone, but I did it and they are wonderful, successful, happily married people today. My son treats his wife like gold, and my daughters have each chosen a wonderful man to be their husband. It starts in childhood; it starts with dedicated parents, single or married.
 
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motomel3
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March 18, 2008, 11:40 am PDT

Need Advice... I might be a love junkie

I have 2 children from a previous marriage and remarried in July 07.  My current husband has 3 children from a previous relationship, so we have 5 kids total.  Prior to getting married, we did discuss having one child.  We agreed to get our finances straight and last month I was able to accomplish this task.  The topic of children has come up again and he has changed his mind and no longer wants another child.  I understand that I can not force him or trick him to have one.   If we don't have a child between us, I feel like part of me will hate him for the rest of our marriage.  If we do have a child, he might hate me and the new baby.  I feel like I am in a "no win" situation.  Both of us have even discussed leaving one another (divorce) because we feel so strongly about the topic. 
 
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ramair
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March 18, 2008, 11:58 am PDT

03/18 Love Junkies

Quote From: flthomcat

And we must NEVER forget that men and women in this country were often raised by their mothers.....mothers who chose the men who lived in the homes where these children grew up.

 

 I wish more women would take responsibility for the choices they make; many of those choices have lasting, sad impacts on their kids. Men often abandon families, which is horrible, but many women often move men in and out of homes/beds and it's the children who suffer. Too often we blame the men and forget about the other half of the equation.

Good observation. How can boys, growing up under such conditions, learn how to treat  women? Other than with disrespect? Boys learn, from their mothers, how women expect to be treated. If their mothers settle for a parade of abusive men, they can't learn to treat women any other way.
 
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farmerswifeny
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March 18, 2008, 12:15 pm PDT

Dr Phil looks cute in brown:)

I think I'm very used to the blacks & greys.  Nice job Robin:)
As for Love Junkies...I've seen them.  Hopefully he'll get her some self-finding counseling...she's missing something.  You don't need a pushoever, you need a man.  I'm so glad my fiance doesn't back down, he tells me how he feels and we've gotten through a lot of different "issues" so much easier because we can talk about things. 
I think she's confused about the definition of love....
I love Dr Phil...
 
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ramair
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March 18, 2008, 12:16 pm PDT

03/18 Love Junkies

Quote From: willvan

I can remember when I was a child that I was always looking for someone to love me. Then, when I grew up I realized that the only one you can control is yourself and the one thing you absolutely cannot do is make someone else love you. The only thing you can do is love others and hope that someone will come to love you. If that happens, you will be lucky and if you recognize it, hold onto her with everything you have. Dawn's problem is that she wants someone else to love her but she is not willing to love someone else. In all those years with all those men she was never willing to commit herself. Why should anyone else commit to her when she is unwilling to reciprocate? You have to be willing to take a chance and hope that you can work it out. 
"...that she wants someone else to love her but she is not willing to love someone else " hits the nail right on the head. The "unconditional love" she demands from men? The question that kept coming to mind throughout the show? Where the hell is her unconditional love for them? If her man-du-jour leaves the toilet seat up, or a pair of socks on the floor, she throws him out like yesterday's news.
 
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ramair
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March 18, 2008, 12:33 pm PDT

03/18 Love Junkies

Quote From: nperry123

I listened to a little bit of her crap and just think that after that many men in her life and all the failed marriages the only common denominator is her. Call it a disease or a disorder or just a problem but quit ruining peoples lives and quit trying to make people think you are the victim. It is only you that causes these issues in your own life. JUST GIVE UP and no more people will get hurt. It is not the end of the world to be single. I have been single for 3 years after a 9 year marriage and I was cheated on several times by my wife. I have never been more happy and now realize that happiness is an emotion that can only come from you. No one can ever "make" you happy. Men are being hurt all over this world because of women like her and to them it is just a problem that they need to work on..blah, blah, blah. If you want men to act like men then stop acting like a highschool girl at a party with a list hidden in her jewelry box of how many guys you bagged, and start acting like a woman whom should be the foundation of love and stability that the family structure is missing so badly in modern times. If you want to know where society has went wrong it is with women like this. Disorder...Please, just give up your childhood and you will be fine.
I'm getting so weary of sorry behavior being excused as diseases and disorders. Or, blamed on someone else. I wish Dr Phil would quit buying into this crap. Whatever happened to "taking ownership" of our behavior? On today's show, it's blame 28 years of treating men like yesterday's news on some kids who teased us 35 years ago.
 
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juliebgg
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March 18, 2008, 12:38 pm PDT

afraid to love?

Quote From: ramair

"...that she wants someone else to love her but she is not willing to love someone else " hits the nail right on the head. The "unconditional love" she demands from men? The question that kept coming to mind throughout the show? Where the hell is her unconditional love for them? If her man-du-jour leaves the toilet seat up, or a pair of socks on the floor, she throws him out like yesterday's news.

I think that she is afraid to love anyone because of the early rejections she experienced. And it also seems as if no amount of love from others is enough for her. She is a bottomless pit right now.

So this does pose a dilemma, doesn't it?  She wants the love of others but will not give it in return.  I believe that the only solution is for her to learn to love herself first, then maybe she can give love to another; and receive as well as be happy with the love from one special person.
 
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summettime55
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March 18, 2008, 1:51 pm PDT

love junkies

wow, this lady.. she seems proud of her 3 marriages and several relationships, as if she is HOT, and she is not. I wish that she would have done more listening to Dr. Phil and less talking. If she had listened to Dr. Phil, she would have done less grinning, she would be a bit less proud of her track record.

this man in her life, is too nice for her, she is going to get tired of him, because he is not a challenge for her. I hope that he don't get ruined, because the next person he meets will pay the price for the pain she put him through, this is true for men or women that treat people good, they end up with someone that is only there for the thril.

 
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poppyseed454
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March 18, 2008, 2:12 pm PDT

DR PHIL Dr Phil DR PHIL

   Dr Phil can you get some better show"S ON PLEASE

WHO CARES IF THEY ARE GOING IN AND OUT OF SO CALL LOVE!

  GET SOME HAPPIER PLEASE AND GET SOMETHING BETTER
 
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