Topic : 08/19 Tired of Being a Mom

Who ever said this child from UKRAINE was a RAD kid anyway? Dr Phil even had trouble believing it and expressed it as such. You might want to play the  disorder activiist part and that is fine but I am am right on with my Asssessment. Some parents use their children and and it doesnt appear you know much about that side of the issue, or even seem to recognize it even happens. You are JUST going to  believe EVERY PARENT that brings up a mental illness diagnosised child and jump on it like a ambulance chaser. Some mothers either by muchousins or some other  self serving mental disorder just make it up, and if you didnt see her talk about only her  interesets than you missed the show. And for her to describe her daughter the way she did without anybody ELSE seeing any of her daughter is asking  too much from any kind of audience to make a welll informed decision on the Ukranian girl.  And to  have to believe only what the mother is saying is asking a audience to judge one side of the story only. I judged the mother to be too shelfish period and havent seen or heard from the daughter so i and  even you dont know if she is RAD  or anything else because you or I didnt see any thing more than a small clip which isnt enough to go on. All anybody got from that part of The show is a one sided story from what I guarantee is a very shelfish lady. Never mind mother or type of mother or type of child she CLAIMS she is raising. It looks more like the child has a DUTY to RAISE her. 

Anyway, these unanswered questions is how  is how dr.phil gets these message boards so hot. He leaves one side of story out and leaves that up to his audience to battle over. Like you and me.. This mother is what she is period. I wont even talk about the child other than what she must be going through because of it. And all you talk about is RAD. You got to see the  kid to know that and you havent and if you want to  take the  believe everything you hear route, go ahead., but dont borher me with that approach because it is too shallow for me to bother with. Sorry , but I know A phoney when I see a phoney. And I hope this phoney doesnt take anything away from  REAL (boy and that word just kills some people) Mothers of RAD or otherwise dependant children but if you couldnt see this lady for what """SHE"" REALLY is Then that is on you .

On RAD,, just like adhd, autism, and other issues sometimes the parents cant bond like this mother of Ukranian girl. Maybe the mother grew up  with a  cold  parent and is looking for love from the child. It happens ALL THE time. If you read the rest of my messages you might have noticed that .It goes both ways, beliveve it or not, but do parents ever  get  diagnosed as ill. NO.Never. So answer that question as to why not, if you know so much. Lot more to these issues that dont get told to you  that do exist none the less. I am sorry you choose to live in your bubble ,and again, let OTHER people tell you what  illnesses are like.It almost makes me think maybe there are beneficiariers that come out  of these sick children.NEVER  any directed at the children though i have  truly noticed.Politics and money. Some message  for another day.  Some of these cases are literaally  MISDIAGNOSED and we never hear anything about it. Do you have the answer as to why? I do. Good P.R. brings in the money. Never mind if it isnt accurate .And with Liberalism, women get attached not to their children but to the (I am A) victim mentality. Turn activist for their OWN good only. Yup . Welcome to America.Spolied women and rich  medical industries, On the backs off suffering children this time .If it isnt free labor from blacks or cheap labor from illegals    it will be the children that pay the price. It is a called capitolism. Some call it democracy . The result is always the same . A victim and a person who capitolizes on it. ALWAYS. Some things in America Just never change . Hate to venture that far around this issue but it is all RELATED when you do the math.  Some mothers just like to take advantage of children believe it or not and this case looks like one of them. (victim syndrome) (dont know what they call it that in the medical disabled section, but I do know it EXISTS )..Again, not all  mothers who make claims are 100% corrrect. You might want to take another look at this one. All mothers arent victims. And ALL claims arent authentic. Fake ones like this one make the real ones look bad. You should be writing this mother and not me, that is where you anger should go, if it was to go in the right place,But that takes work you would have to do and  playing a victim would only get in the way.    

If a friend of mine came on national tv and said she was tired of being my friend and was stressed out all the time, I'd be SUPPORTIVE of her and give her all the time in the world away, even if it meant the end of our friendship.  I dont take it personally, that's just how she feels, and I respect that.

If my mom went on national tv and said she was stressed out and spent the night at a friend's house.  Fine.  At least she went to get help- and guess what?  She CAME BACK!   Voila!  All she needs is time away, time with friends, time to talk with other adults, maybe time to pursue a degree online and fulfill some of those dreams or even get a part-time job and still be there to pick me up in the afternoon if it makes her feel fulfilled and "alive".  I'd be SUPPORTIVE!  She didn't throw her kids under the bus at all, she's saying she was overwhelmed. At least she's working on being a good mom by taking breaks and working on being an even better mom, how is THAT bad?

Connie,

I understand your pain. No matter how much you prepare, you still never know the final outcome. I have 6 kids in all... 2 blological, 2 step and 2 adopted from Ukraine. They all have their problems, but the pain of a child hurting that you can't help with love... well, it tears you apart.  You can't relate unless you've been there. I went into this Eyes Wide Open am well educated and obviously have a variety of experiences with my 6 kids. I love all my kids deeply and would do anything for any one of them. Sometimes though, "there's just not enough chocolate."  I am mom to Alyssa on Tuesday's show and wounld be happy to talk to you. God Bless, Robyn 

What's the difference?  Are you playing the semantics game here?  Why do you need to keep picking away at this?  Are you feeling insecure, or what?

Bottom line:  These kids are probably not hurt by this.  Charity is becoming a better parent now, why dwell on the past?

I agree with you. The disorder you're thinking of is Munchausen's Syndrome by Proxy. I became rather interested in the psychology behind it, after seeing The Sixth Sense, which has a story in it that involves Munchausen's Syndrome by Proxy. You see Munchausen's Syndrome, is when someone makes themselves sick for attention from the hospital, or whomever. Munchausen's Syndrome by Proxy is when someone makes another person sick, usually a child, for sympathy and attention from people.

I don't know what the clinical term would be for victim's syndrome. My guess, based on what it says in a Abnormal Psychology book I own, is it's either Histronic or Narcissistic personality disorder. I'm thinking it's Histronic personality disorder, since it is exhibited by people who belive there's alot of drama in their lives. Also, it's more prevalent amongst women.