Topic : 04/10 Marriage Dilemmas

Hi all,

THis is Selena from the show today. It aired over a year and half ago and a lot of things have changed since then. First of all, we didn't take Dr. Phil's advice and we did have a child. She is 9 months old tomorrow. Our show aired in October. So we think she was actually conceived in CA!  Our fighting about cleaning isn't as extreme as it looked in the show. We have more of an understanding now. We both work, and take care of a baby so we have to be a little bit more flexible. We still both have our things we like to clean. For me, its the kitchen, living room and bathroom. Dan- he likes to do the bedroom, laundry (unless its Isabelle's- the I do it) and do the vaccumming. I still do the cooking and pay the bills. Dan just keeps the bills that are paid organized. All in all, I am very happy with my life.

I don't believe in "sin" and I don't believe in Santa, or the Easter Bunny, or the tooth fairy, and the Bible is a novel, written by who???  If being Gay is so "unnatural" then why have people been born like that, from the beginning of TIME, my dear???

BEING GAY IS NOT A "LIFESTYLE" AND IT IS NOT A "CHOICE."  ONE IS BORN GAY, AND THERE HAVE BEEN NUMEROUS STUDIES DONE TO PROVE THAT.  THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH BEING GAY, UNLESS YOU ARE WRAPPED UP IN THE "SINNER" CRAP, THAT CAUSES PEOPLE TO LIVE A LIE, AND GET MARRIED, AND HAVE KIDS, AND THEN FINALLY THEY CAN'T LIVE THAT LIE ANYMORE.  THE ONLY BAD THING ABOUT BEING GAY IS THE BULL THAT THE REPRESSIVE BIBLE THUMPERS PILE ON THEM TO FORCE THEM INTO THE CLOSET, UNTIL THEY EITHER HANG THEMSELVES, OR END UP COMING OUT AND BREAKING UP THEIR FICTITIOUS FAMILY (FICTITIOUS WIFE AND KIDS).  IT IS YOU REPRESSIVE TYPES THAT ARE THE PROBLEM!  YOU REPRESSIVE JUDGEMENTAL TYPES ARE THE REAL SINNERS!!!  SHAME ON YOU FOR CALLING GAY PEOPLE "UNNATURAL" AND ALL THAT.

 At  the first part of the show, when they were talking about the 2 girls,(daughters) the first couple, the wife and mother said that the oldest daughter first brought up about homosexuality being a "sin". So , no more was said about that. The daughter was worried about the implications to her family and her church. This to me, is very much something that could really affect her because her Faith is app. very important to her. She must be very confused. I wander how the parents can handle the problem the right way with out confusing her. I feel like she really is confused and from what little she said on TV, she is very upset. Maybe more then she is saying. Or maybe she has said more and it just wasn't shown. Anyway, just my thoughts were that it seemed ,well, I don't know, just confused.Just being a teen is enough, that has got to have a huge impact , finding out her father is gay.  Thanks

number one you are apparently about 10 years older than said boyfriend.

number two what on earth were you thinking having a child with said boyfriend specially when he cannot hold down a full time job.

you laid in your bed of your own choosing so now you have to deal with it on your own because trust me your said boyfriend will not help you and past performance is present performance.

oh yeah and as far as your sick child you will have to deal with that on your own also.

i agree whole heartedly with you.

the main thing wrong is so called christians who don't know the first thing about being christian!!

being christian is about loving,caring and not passing judgement. if yeshua was walking this earth today he would embrace everyone regardless of sexual orientation,creed,complexion or religion.

Some people are just born unorganized and don't get it.  I recommend a book called "From Pigpen to Paradise" by Pam Brace and Peggy Jones.  They are 2 sisters that came up with a way to organize their home and life that is very simple.  I attended one of the classes that they used to teach.  That was at least 20 years ago.  I don't even know if it is still in print.  But, a lot of libraries still have it.  This changed my life.  I later ended up teaching their classes.  It was a good time in my life. Once you are on the program it then becomes habit.  Pam and Peggy were from the Washington state area and used to be known as The Slob Sisters.  Hope this helps someone.  They would be great on the show.

The couple who is struggling with the husband's concern over his wife's not keeping the house clean may want to consider this option:  My husband and I have been married for 38 years and when I was teaching and later became a principal, I had less and less energy to clean the house the way I wanted it--and believe me--I love a clean house!  After struggling with this dilemna as a couple for several years (including my resentment towards him for not helping me more around the house), we came to the realization that we had to do something differently.  We agreed to sacrifice some of our "wants" and invest that money into a house cleaning service.  At the time, we could only afford this service bi-monthly.  It was amazing how much our relationship changed!!!  

 

 We now enjoy weekly cleaning services, but beyond that, we have come to realize that our marriage was worth more than to constantly be in a battle about a "clean house".  Our relationship is much bigger than that and from what I saw today, yours is too!

                          Randal why would you do this to your WIFE?

SHAM SHAM SHAM!!!!!

             How could you do this to your kids?

 

And what about AIDS???????????????

I would be so upset to think that my hubby was sleeping with a norther dam man.

And think about him putting his hands on me or even kissing me and thinking he had

some one other than me on his dam lips!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How sick and I would kick him out.

I am sorry it is a sin and and god will get you for this. 

                I have a brother that is gay and it still makes  me ANGRY!!

POOR KIDS!

                                    I would be upset ! it was bad when my real dad

was all ways sleeping with other women and he went to bed with a man.

I could never forgive him for that.

my mom did divorce him.

I hope that the kids will be OK but it really is not OK.

And Dr Phil and what are you thinking of?

THE KIDS ARE BEING HURT NOT THE PARENTS!

                                                                                     

If someone wants to be gay, fine. But there are people out there who are actually questioning their homosexuality. I can say that because I know of one RIGHT NOW. What do you say to that individual? "oh why are you questioning? You were born that way. It's okay. Even though your doubting, push it aside. You've been gay for 10+ years. Keep going."

What do you say to those people? What response do you have for someone who once was gay and now is not? As I said, when you are that deep in sin you don't see it as a choice. You don't recall that first thought you had that lead you down that path.

(how many people are hurting inside?)

There are many reasons men and women start down that path. Poor relationship with their fathers, they were sexually abused as a child or in some women's cases they were sexually abused as an adult. Others just started with experimenting. Again I ask, what about persons who are bi-sexual? "Well you're um... homo-hetero-morphosexual. It's okay as long as you're happy and you feel good about yourself." Where they born bi-sexual?

I want the truth. Even if it hurts at first.