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Topic : 04/15 "Desperate for My Daughter"

Number of Replies: 71
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Created on : Friday, April 11, 2008, 08:19:27 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Raising children is no easy task, and even your best efforts can backfire. Adrienne knows about this pain firsthand. She says her 17-year-old daughter, Angela, was an honor student with dreams of becoming a doctor, but she ran away and is now a prostitute. Angela has only attended school for four or five months since 2005, is now pregnant and says it’s better on the streets than at home. Bishop T.D. Jakes, author of Reposition Yourself, has a one-on-one chat with the troubled teen. Find out what Angela experienced on the run, and why she is so reluctant to reconcile with her mom. Then, Adrienne hasn’t seen her daughter in five months, and they face off on Dr. Phil's stage. Tempers flare, and Angela threatens to leave the show. Is their relationship ruined forever, or will the teen make peace with her mom? Join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

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May 16, 2008, 11:03 am CDT

To Angela

Quote From: webster77am

 Everyone,
    I am glad that you tuned in to the show.  I am not surprised at the emotions that flared from such a show.  However, let us all get something straight here.  I'm not sure what all went on in every home across America, but I have an Idea that my house is pretty average , just because of all the mail that we got about the show.   I am sorry for the young people that were abused as children, but I got my record straight with God. I spoiled that little girl, and people told me that I was going to feel that pain, with disrespect in time, I didn't listen.  She was caged as she says, from pedophiles, and danger, I just didn't let her go places at a young age to protect her.  Apparently that didn't work.  I gave her more than I ever had, and so what if I had pain too.  Is that not the reason that you better for your kids.  You don't have to feel sorry for me.  I forgive Angela, and she forgives me for the ISOLATED INCIDENT! with the belt. Trust me the wordings  were wrong, and she knows that, and I know that.  We were both nervous.  My daughter loves me, that show was taped almost 7 months ago.  When I found out that my daughter was raped, I felt sick, and still do sometimes.  How could my perfect protection, and guidance, allow this tragedy to happen.  I have blamed myself sometimes.  My daughter is fine, and we love each other more than ever now.  I feel, that the only reason why Angela never wanted to let me know about the rape, is because she felt like I would judge her, because of my high standards, as well as her own standards.  That is the way a child thinks.  Feel sorry for me, please, that is not what I expect from American's now-a-days.  People don't truly care like they should.  Otherwise you wouldn't have comments of hatred coming back from a show that was supposed to help someone.  I felt that these measures would help someone else, and Angela felt that way too.  She is moving back home, and is not pregnant, never was.  I think that Angela felt that I warned her about the danger, but she didn't want to take responsibility of saying her Mother was right.  We never want to say our parents are right, that hurts too, been there. All kids go through that phase.  The only difference is that today, people are more evil in this world, and our kids want to grow up, and grow up in rapid speeds, but in an unhealthy way.  Is there anything wrong with wanting the best for my kid.  Especially a black woman.  Black women are the backbone of our black men, and families and yes, she should be the best in life.  She is going back to school, and what you saw was rebellion.  I take responsibility for two things, and that is 1. Loving too hard, and 2. Reminding her of how, I told her so. I was wrong to stick it sometimes, but I learned the hard way too.  Could I have approached this differently, yes.  Angela still knew right from wrong, she took chances with her life.   These two things happen with mothers all across America, and by the way, I grew up Catholic, and in the past decade plus have given my life to Christ Jesus.  Just a reminder I was not the best listener to my mother either.  I am not perfect, but when I see families with weird things like allowing their kids to drink, and have sex at 13, and partying with their children.  I think you know, had it not been for that creep taking my daughter's innocence, we would be OK today.  Now for the record, Angela apologized to me, and I to her.  We are so cool now, like friends, mother, and daughter.  She is strong in the Faith of Jesus Christ, that is how she was raised.  The show helped us both to vent feelings, and emotions, and we will get counseling together real soon.  By the way I am not as heavy now as I was then.  I had an operation on my foot, and put on a ton of weight.  Angela and I really look alike now.  I love all of your comments, that is what America is all about.  I hope this bought some light and healing to someone out there.  And remember Jesus, will heal all wounds if you just believe He can. Like Bishop said,'" tomorrow is not promised".  Parents forgive your kids, and Children forgive your parents, it's all worth it, it really is.
Sincerely,
Adrienne and Angela      
 P.S.
Hi, this is Angela, and I did realize   I made mistakes.  My mom was right, and I almost lost my life very shortly after the show.  I have a good job now, and me and mom are great.  Thanks Dr. Phil.  And to all the ladies, and girls out there, mom's are special.  I love Mom.  i only have one, and we are alright.  As for the man that raped me, God's got that.  I am working on myself now, and I will be all that I can be.  I turn 18 in a few month's, and will start driving when I return home.  I am OK, hope you girls out there are too!!
GOD BLESS!!
Love Angela

I know this is kind of late but first of all I want to reach out to Angela. I was so touched by your story. When I first saw you, I thought you were such a gorgeous, lovely, intelligent girl with class who could go to the top, you definitely didn't seem like the average want to stay in the streets and hang out girl but I believe something happen in life that made you downspiral. I'm 24,  and I grew up in an abusive household, I am black too and looking back I feel my mother didn't protect me as much as she could have, no one believed I was abused because in our community its looked at as normal to get "beatings" but I know the difference and I believe it went too far many times with me. I went through a lot of grief and soul searching to try to better myself. Our parents make mistakes which sometimes can really hurt our lives but we need to talk it out. My mother didn't realize she did all the things she did until it was too late, she didn't know all the thiings that happene because I never told her, if she could do it all over, she would be a better mom. We just have to learn from our parents mistakes. Angela, you really have a chance in life, you got a second chance, which many don't get, take advantage of it. Get your diploma, go to college, and become the best, maybe you can do something to help other young girls who were in your situation. I believe from our own experiences and from what we learn from it, we can become better people and help others who are in the same situations. I like to see other black people get helping on tv, many try to act as though nothing is wrong or they don't want to change, so I know it took a lot of courage to go on national tv and "tell your business" but believe it or not many were inspired by your story and it let a lot in our community know that ain't nothing wrong with getting help or therapy, we don't know everything and were human beings with feelings too. I don't find too many people who've been through what I have within our community or maybe they are too embarrassed to talk about it.

 

I know I don't have the right but I'm gonna say it, leave those lowlife guys alone. You deserve the best and its worth waiting for. Get a guy who has something going for him, college or a good job. Please email me, my email addres is in my profile.

 
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