Topic : 04/24 A Boy in Trouble

Number of Replies: 391
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Created on : Friday, April 18, 2008, 03:25:01 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
What if you found out that your own child was molesting other children? Sherie-Lynn says her 12-year-old son, Parker, has been acting out sexually since he was 4 years old. She always suspected that he had been molested, and now that he’s been expelled from school for violent behavior and inappropriate sexual conduct with another student, she’s confronting her family’s dirty secret. Could Sherie-Lynn’s father, Al, whom she claims molested her as a child, have violated her son? And what does Sherie-Lynn’s mother, Elaine, say she witnessed? As Sherie-Lynn faces her painful past, will her father give her the answers she’s looking for? Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.


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May 16, 2008, 12:16 pm PDT

Ohh you, I sympathize so much

Quote From: anniekc

I have been there. My grandfather molested me at a small age into my adult hood. He always was very relgious. Plus told me that all grandfathers love thier grandchildren they do this. My family doesn't know this. I am 30 years old now. I don't have the tools yet to forgive, and forget it. I have talked to a counsler about it all. My husband knows what happens. I hope this mother and child can go on and they need support from friends and family not looked as evil people
Hello.

My nam eis Synthia.

I am really sad with you, or for you when you just get angry or scared I guess sometimes, or plain ol' numb it to not think about it at all!

Wow, I would like to touche your hand and say everything is going to be all right...

Hum... It is now maybe the time for you to accept the tolls Doctor Phil offers. I myself am becoming stronger in the grace of integrating Dr Phil's teachings, with some external minimal support.

How are you today?

I care and hope youu can feel this really. Your grand father comes from a time of deprivation, obligation for the nation, and total manipulation time from all types of authorities.

His mind his screwed like that, so in fact, maybe he does not suffer... Because of his level of unconscience, or closedness, or rigid structures favorising the hidden treasures or truths.

Anyways, I just want to tell you that I am far from perfect. I have destroyed myself alot even if I have may sensitive gifts. I wish you to get out and share and learn from tools on your way.

Much much of a kind of friendly spontaneous, with no back idea, support and I wish you all to feel good and loved.

Synthia
 
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May 18, 2008, 10:07 pm PDT

help never came

Quote From: anon_slc

Probably one of the most disturbing facts about child sexual abuse and incest is that in 80% of reported cases, the mother of the victim was aware of the sexual abuse inflicted on the child, yet did little or nothing about it.  Just how responsible is a parent for failing to report or stop the sexual abuse of a child or family member? 

 

If the sexual assault has occurred within 72 hours of a physical examination, forensic evidence collection should be conducted.  A complete physical examination, including careful documentation of any lacerations (a torn or jagged wounds), ecchymoses (skin discoloration caused by the escape of blood into the tissues from ruptured blood vessels) or petechiae (pinpoint size flat round red dots under the skin surface caused from hemorrage - bleeding into the skin), is critical. Physical examination of the oral cavity includes inspection of the hard and soft palate for bruising or petechiae, and inspection of the frenulum (the membrane that attaches the tongue to the floor of the mouth) for any lacerations that can result from forced oral penetration. 

 

Rape evidence collection kits are available in the emergency department of most hospitals. Evaluation of acute sexual assault may be conducted in an emergency department setting or, if available, at a children's advocacy center. In nonacute cases, the office of the family physician has the benefit of being a familiar location for the patient.  The physician should maintain a gentle and calm demeanor and be considerate of the apprehensive child. It is helpful to explain the examination beforehand to the patient and caretaker.

 

Medical problems include anogential (anal) trauma, bleeding, irritation or discharge, dysuria (painful or difficult urination), frequent urinary tract infections, encopresis (repeated passing of feces into places other than the toilet), enuresis (repeated passing of urine into places other than the toilet), pregnancy, diagnosis of a sexually transmitted disease (STD) and oral trauma

 

Children may present with somatic (muscles and nerves) complaints such as recurrent agdominal pain or frequent headaches resulting from the psychologic stress.  Sexual acting-out behavior is the most specific indicator of possible sexual abuse.

 

Child sexual abuse generally refers to sexual acts, sexually motivated behaviors, or sexual exploitation involving children. Child sexual abuse includes a wide range of behaviors, such as: 

  • Oral, anal, or genital penile penetration

  • Anal or genital digital or other penetration

  • Genital contact with no intrusion

  • Fondling of a child's breasts or buttocks

  • Indecent exposure

  • Inadequate or inappropriate supervision of a child's voluntary sexual activities

  • Use of a child in prostitution, pornography, Internet crimes, or other sexually exploitative activities

Sexual abuse includes both touching offenses (fondling or sexual intercourse) and nontouching offenses (exposing a child to pornographic materials) and can involve varying degrees of violence and emotional trauma.  

 

The most commonly reported cases involve incest, or sexual abuse occurring among family members, including those in biological families, adoptive families, and stepfamilies. Incest most often occurs within a father-daughter relationship.  

 

Mother-son, father-son, and sibling-sibling incest also occurs. Sexual abuse is also sometimes committed by other relatives or caretakers. In fifty percent of reported child sexual abuse within families the perpetrator was an older sibling.

 

Consider the possibility of sexual abuse when the child

  • Has difficulty walking or sitting

  • Suddenly refuses to change for gym or to participate in physical activities

  • Reports nightmares or bedwetting

  • Experiences a sudden change in appetite

  • Demonstrates bizarre, sophisticated, or unusual sexual knowledge or behavior

  • Becomes pregnant or contracts a venereal disease, particularly if under age 14

  • Runs away

  • Reports sexual abuse by a parent or another adult caregiver

Consider the possibility of sexual abuse when the parent or other adult caregiver

  • Is unduly protective of the child or severely limits the child's contact with other children, especially of the opposite sex

  • Is secretive and isolated

  • Is jealous or controlling with family members 

The presence of a single sign does not prove child abuse is occurring in a family; however, when these signs appear repeatedly or in combination you should take a closer look at the situation and consider the possibility of child sexual abuse. 


Search State statues for issues related to child abuse and neglect, child welfare, and adoption:

www.childwelfare.gov/systemwide/laws_policies/state/


Hope it helps!


 

I learned last summer my 11 year old son was digitally molesting my 3 year and 5 year old girls. We took them to the hospital. Saw a hospital social worker, we were very honest about everything.

 

The POLICE and CPS did NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!

We were left pretty much ALONE to pick up the peices. Don't say parents don't do anything! I have some colorful words come to mind when I hear that. We did everything we could. But NOBODY helped us. I had to give legal gaurdianship of my son to a relive that lives about 700 miles away.

 

My son is also bi-polar. He was getting proffestional help. He had theropy almost weekly and had a phychiatrist. NOBODY saw this coming.

 

There are no support groups for parents of perpatrators and victums. Now my young daughters are well aware of genital sensations at such an inappropriate age.

 

What makes this story so appauling to me, is I was raped as a young teen. I swore I would do ANYTHING to protect my daughters from anything even similar to that. I failed. I didn't protect them from my son. I had no idea he even knew about such things.

 

Everytime I tried to have "the talk" with him, he was grossed out. I would only get as far as pubic and armpi hair and he would act grossed out. I had no idea he knew of female genitals.  He never even talks about body parts.

 

Lets face it folks there aren't always warning signs! If trained proffessionals couldn't tell anything was wrong, how was I supposed to?

 

Also he was never molested. We made sure to ask him that, after we learned what he did. Even the proffesssionals asked him. He had NO introduction to his crimes.

 

I would like however, people to be aware, it isn't always the parents fault.

 

Don't put the blame on all of us!!! That is unjust and ignorant.  Personally I would like some copywritten information on what this bulletun has posted. I am not saying its wrong, but I would like to see information to back this up. I would also like to know who was taking the numbers on the study.

 
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May 18, 2008, 10:28 pm PDT

It is NOT the MOTHER's FAULT

Quote From: sami0811

Im just curious as to why the mother of the little boy deeply felt that she was molested by her own father and new it , then knowing that information from her own experience then WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD YOU LET YOR SON STAY WITH THE GRANDFATHER KNOWING THAT HE DID THAT TO HER!!! that just doesnt make any sense to me....if it were me and my daughter....if i was molested as a child by my father and new there would be no way in HELL that i would let my father be near her for even a moment.......thats just CRAZY she's almost as quilty as he is.....he is such a liar, he knows what he did he just doesnt want to get into trouble for it like most pedifiles do......He needs to be in jail and she needs therapy!!!

If this man, that was supposed to such a bible thumper, put any doubt in her head, it was about THE TRUTH!!!!!  You guys seem to forget about brainwashing!!!! Who would beleive her in the first place people? He was a man of GOD. He had many people fooled.  That is the only reason. Haven't you heard the expression how can 1 million people be wrong?

 

She was a victim also. Who did she have to turn to? Stop thinking so narrowminded!!!

 
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May 19, 2008, 2:36 pm PDT

The Grandfather From Hell

Hello

I couldn't believe this Man.. He couldn't even make his religious convictions sound convincing.  He  didn't make any sense. I hope the Police in his jurisdiction are looking into this.. Just admitting to the fact that the attempt molestation of his infant daughter on nation wide television. His wife is like a deer with her head in the head lights.  Obviously there has been abuse in her life by her husband flake husband.  How can any mother or grandmother allow any children to sleep with him.. IE Grandson.  And frankly I don't understand why the daughter would allow her son to have sleep overs or  unsupervised visits based on her feelings that she was molested by her father as a child.  

 

 

 
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May 19, 2008, 3:11 pm PDT

The Father-Grandfather From Hell

Hello

I couldn't believe this Man.. He couldn't even make his religious convictions sound convincing.  He  didn't make any sense. I hope the Police in his jurisdiction are looking into this.. Just admitting to the fact that the attempt molestation of his infant daughter on nation wide television. His wife is like a deer with her head in the head lights.  Obviously there has been abuse in her life by her flake of a husband.  How can any mother or grandmother allow any children to sleep with him.. IE Grandson.  And frankly I don't understand why the daughter would allow her son to have sleep overs or  unsupervised visits based on her feelings that she was molested by her father as a child.  

 I hope he has come clean in the next show, and the proper authorities are involved as mentioned at the end of the last segment. They really don't like child molesters in maximum security facilites. Perhaps if he was to be convicted of what he has done by the proper authorities, he would then understand why he is asking God for help.!!! 

 
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May 21, 2008, 2:51 pm PDT

04/24 A Boy in Trouble

Quote From: navyfamily

If this man, that was supposed to such a bible thumper, put any doubt in her head, it was about THE TRUTH!!!!!  You guys seem to forget about brainwashing!!!! Who would beleive her in the first place people? He was a man of GOD. He had many people fooled.  That is the only reason. Haven't you heard the expression how can 1 million people be wrong?

 

She was a victim also. Who did she have to turn to? Stop thinking so narrowminded!!!

So it seems to me that you think victims can do whatever and it's not their fault. My child was molested and the person who did it to him was a victim also. Even though he was 30 when he did this to my child it's not his fault huh? He knew it was wrong but he's a victim so he shouldn't be blamed for what he did to my child? She is to blame as much as grandpa!
 
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May 21, 2008, 3:48 pm PDT

04/24 A Boy in Trouble

What I would like to know is why isn't that disgusting man in jail. Not only should he be in jail as we speak but so should that mother. She was it happen when her daughter was 2 weeks old. They should both me in jail. There both sick.
 
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May 21, 2008, 5:20 pm PDT

04/24 A Boy in Trouble

I can't believe that he was trying 2 hide behind God. His daughter needs some healing n he won't even do the right thing he makes sick 2 my stomch. Sherie-Lynn be strong I know u can get through it. I am here if u need 2 talk.

 

Johanna

 
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May 23, 2008, 9:08 pm PDT

Boy in trouble

Quote From: blind_knoledge

I would like to know how many of you know what its like to be raped. Well I do. I was repeatedly raped from the age of 7 until i was 12 by my grand fother on my dad's side. I showed no signs of being abused my grades stayed the same i didn't act out in any way. Why didn't i tell he thretened to kill me even showed me what he what he would do it with. All 3 women in my family have been raped 2 of us repeatedly. So please think before you just say some thing or judge some one.

I don't understand why the mom of the "boy in trouble" stayed close to her parents for so many years after being physically and sexually abused by her father or why she let her son be alone with him. I can only assume she mentally blocked it out of her head until her son started showing signs of abuse. I don't understand how the grandmother could stand by her husband after what he did to his daughter either. Perhaps now she will be strong enough to get out of the marriage and get help and also to be there for her daughter and grandson. I believe that the grandfather molested his grandson but he probably will never admit to it for fear of going to prison. I wonder if he was ever molested as a child? It will be interesting to see what happens with this family.

 
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July 23, 2008, 8:59 pm PDT

04/24 A Boy in Trouble

Quote From: stephic15

I was going to post that same question.  As a parent myself, the very first thing I would do is protect my child and keep him away from them.  Grandmother to because she has allowed it to happen.  Very first suspicion I would be gone.
I was going to ask the same question as well and why didnt Dr Phill ask?. Iam a mother of 5 and i know of an uncle that has touched his daughter and she did the same thing leaving her son and daughter over her fathers house over night (lots of time), Knowing to well that he touched her when she was a girl, i dont understand why a parent would do that (unless they are lying or attention seekers) I would never leave my children in his care ever . What the hell is Sherie-lynn thinking.
 

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