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Topic : 08/04 Daddy Drama

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Created on : Friday, April 25, 2008, 03:00:17 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 04/29/08) Christina, 21, and her younger sister, Carlie, 13, say they had a close relationship with their father, Michael, until two years ago when he decided to transition to a female. Michael was a police officer, soldier and loving parent who lived his life as a male for 40 years. Now, he wants his daughters to call him Mom, because he says Dad is gone, but they refuse. Michael, who prefers to be called Kayla, says she wants to explain to her daughters why she's living as a woman, but they've never given her the chance. The last time Christina saw her father was two years ago when he showed up at her work in lace and blue jeans to break the news that he's transgendered. When she sees Kayla onstage, does she greet her with open arms? Next, Carlie joins her sister and father. She says she wants her old dad back, but will she feel the same after seeing Kayla? Can the father-daughter bond be turned into a mother-daughter one? Be prepared for an emotional journey as two daughters  struggle to understand how someone they say loved so much could hurt them so badly. Talk about the show here.

Find out what happened on the show.

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August 4, 2008, 3:13 pm PDT

Agreed

Quote From: pebblesb

 she's 13 how could you say that and feel sorry for HIIM. he's not hiding emotions he doesn't have any.
I agree that Karla is hiding her emotions, and it's sad that Dr. Phil didn't even recognize that.
 
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August 4, 2008, 3:14 pm PDT

08/04 Daddy Drama

Quote From: madeline1122

I definitely think its the girls who are being the most selfish here.  Their dad cant help what sexual orientation he is, how can they ask him to change that, just to make themselves more comfortable?  What if one of the daughters was a lesbian and the father wanted nothing to do with her because it made him uncomfortable, and because they were born with female parts and should be coupled with a male? It would be wrong to ask them to just stay with men and fake who they are just to make their dad happy. So how can they ask their dad to fake who he is? This is the only show i've seen so far where i have disagreed with almost everything dr. phil has said. these girls still have their father, he is just in a different skin. get over it!!!!
how can they ask their dad to fake who he is? well he sure didn't mind faking it when he married THREE women and no they don't have a father.
 
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August 4, 2008, 3:16 pm PDT

exactly!

Quote From: pebblesb

 she's 13 how could you say that and feel sorry for HIIM. he's not hiding emotions he doesn't have any.
the last response was correct.  Kayla is obssesed with his/her "feelings" and seems completely selfish. Dr. Phil should have told him where to get off.  Sorry buddy but you are a MAN and a father, do your job!
 
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August 4, 2008, 3:16 pm PDT

a rose is a rose

I have a feeling this father is narcissistic and selfish no matter what his gender.  If a woman and mother had shown that little compassion on stage with her children she would have been crucified.  Maybe he can't help how he feels, but he certainlycan help how he acts.  
 
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August 4, 2008, 3:16 pm PDT

Excellent point.

Quote From: utahmom63

It was so frustrating watching today's show.  Dr. Phil was not fair.  Those daughters only wanted dad to be a man - they didn't want any other conversation. Why would dad contact them - they would throw hatred right back.  I would have been just as "careful" as he was.  I was disappointed with Dr. Phil today (he is usually right on the money).  My 10 and 15 year old daughters even said those girls should support their dad in his new Identity.
The older daughter is being very difficult. The younger one I feel would be more understanding... she is just acting like her older sister now. I agree that Karla is feeling vulnerable. There should be effort to reach out on both sides.. if the daughter just treats her dad like crap when he calls, why would he want to call? I feel that unfortunately, Karla doesn't feel like she can have an impact. But she can, at least with the youngest daughter-- she just doesn't know that, and Dr. Phil made no effort to try to explain that. I felt very sad for Karla and angry at Dr. Phil while watching this episode.
 
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August 4, 2008, 3:17 pm PDT

They didn't have a choice either.

To me, it seems this father is more concerned with leaving his "male life" behind and everything that went along with it, including his children. Just as him being a woman trapped in a man's body was not a choice for him, these children had no choice in being born. He has a responsibility to be in their lives, especially the child who is still underage. If he felt as if this was something he would not be able to suppress forever he had the choice to not have more children. I don't think his transformation is wrong, but I think he should make more of an effort to make things as close to the way they were as possible for the children without going against who he is. Asking them to call him "mom" or "aunt" is very insensitive. They have known him as "dad" for most of their lives. I think if he were a little more compassionate about how they feel, they'd be a little more accepting. Right now, I see them as being almost discarded along with his old identity, and I think thats how they felt. I hope they all find a way to make this work. My heart goes out to the children.
 
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August 4, 2008, 3:17 pm PDT

Disgusting

First of all I do not like gender change.  Be that as it may,  that man is just that, he does not have the emotional nuturing that a woman has.  So as far as I am concerned he remains a man that has no clue about or understanding what a woman truly is.

There is no way that I would have made it through dry-eyed through that poem.  I would have been blubbering on the carpet and stood up and enveloped that child.  Also he does not get it, his kids are naturally reacting to this enormous change that they were never a part of and that was dumped on them.  "Take me this way or no way attitude."

I do not blame the kids, however I do blame him for not getting the psychological help he needed to make this change in their lives, but also in his own.

He needs to rethink his actions and begin again or he will die a very bitter old man in an old woman's body.

 
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August 4, 2008, 3:18 pm PDT

Daddy Drama

Quote From: superella

Whoa Dr. phil.

" you sit here and show no compassion for your girls and the hurt you are causing"
Is the older daughter 21 right? That is an adult. Where is her compassion for her own father.
She states " you don't look like a father, not mentally not at all" She is hostile and Dr. phil just allows her to vent on stage.
The mother of the eldest daughter has most definety poisoned her daughter with telling her about the child
support. That is a parental issue not to be shared with the children.
I feel for the youngest daughter but the eldest child is bitter, mean and hateful.
I do not agree with dr. phils approach with this subject. I am a parent and I do not believe that I should sacrifice my own identity to please my child. How would that teach my child to be her own person.

I agree with you! Was Dr. Phil seeing the same thing we saw on the show today?

 
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August 4, 2008, 3:18 pm PDT

Agreed

Quote From: superella

Whoa Dr. phil.

" you sit here and show no compassion for your girls and the hurt you are causing"
Is the older daughter 21 right? That is an adult. Where is her compassion for her own father.
She states " you don't look like a father, not mentally not at all" She is hostile and Dr. phil just allows her to vent on stage.
The mother of the eldest daughter has most definety poisoned her daughter with telling her about the child
support. That is a parental issue not to be shared with the children.
I feel for the youngest daughter but the eldest child is bitter, mean and hateful.
I do not agree with dr. phils approach with this subject. I am a parent and I do not believe that I should sacrifice my own identity to please my child. How would that teach my child to be her own person.
I'm glad to see people that support my view. After watching this show I was appalled at how Dr. Phil treated Karla.
 
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August 4, 2008, 3:19 pm PDT

08/04 Daddy Drama

Quote From: stevew

the reaction of these girls is perfectly natural.  this man/woman is a selfish and  sick individual who should renounce his so-called 'feelings' and get back to being the Father he should be, as a man!

he can't exactly be a man. he was born to be a woman and that is what he will be. he is still the same person on the inside. it is sad that he been forced to conform to society's standards for so long.he didn't do this to hurt his children. he did this because he NEEDED to.

 
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