Quote From: crysta555 My son of 26 is planning to marry next January to the most controlling, selfish, self centered, gold digger I have ever seen. I don't get the fact that he hasn't. They have a baby together which I feel was a trick on her part to get him. See they both met with each just ending another relationship that caused them to only feel sorry for each other. Her previous relationship consist of ending with her having an abortion. She litterally moved in my son's place with just a backpack. This was 2 years ago. No Job, NO drivers license, No vehicle! He has supported everything! He complained back in December and wanted out! That's when I got involved and told him I saw it from the start and gave him advice. Well he ended up going to his dad (who I've been divorced from 8 yrs) and heard a different advice. That he should take her back and continue to give her support and help that she needs. See my ex is the same...selfish, self centered, AND VERY controlling. Now because they are back together I'm the devil and that I caused them to break up. So SHE won't let him bring my grandson to visit me and my husband. I say he doesn't have the guts to stand up to her and just do it! Well my son just bought a house and announced the wedding plans through email to us. I know Jan.2009 is far away and a lot can happen between now and then. But what my son isn't seeing is "The Big Picture" of the future! He has worked hard for what he has and is a good man.
I'm afraid of what she can do after the marriage! So I have this email on my draft writing him giving him more sugguested and including how not just less then 4 months ago he text me "I want out, but don't know how" . I believe the excitement with getting the house has blurred his vision and mind of what she is all about! She is talking crap, her house her this her that! Anyway I really want to send this email but can't seem to click the "send" button. Any suggestions?
OH MOM>>>Listen carefully>>> I understand how you feel>>REALLY I do. I was going through a similar problem with my son. Not quite the same story, but my son met this girl after dating another girl he was seeing for 3 years. I LOVED HER!! I thought she was the best thing for him. Anyway, to make a long story short, they broke up and he met this girl now that he's with. She has a 3 year old son. She was VERY quiet when ever she came around. I spoke to my son about it. She was the opposite of his other girlfriend. ANYWAY, my son thought he would have his girlfriend and the kid to stay at my house every weekend because this girl didn't drive. I told him NO I wasn't dealing with that. A argument pursude and we were mad at each other for awhile. He ended up telling me that he really loves this girl. That he knoes that I liked the other one but he didn't!! And he claimed I wasn't too happy with her having a child. I told him that I was just concerned about his future. he's 23!! I thought he was jumping into FAMILY LIFE a little too soon. To make a long story short>>> I HAD TO LEARN TO MIND MY OWN BUISNESS. I don't mean that she could stay at my house now, I just mean that I had to mind my own buisness in the choices he was making on choosing girlfriends. Now they moved in together. My son is like yours. Very hard working and a devoted person. Look it, I KNOW IT'S HARD!!! We want too protect them as much as possible. BUT no matter how much we may not like their decisions, IT'S STILL THEIR DECISION!!! If things start to fall apart, all we can do is be there to lend a helping hand. Sometimes it's good for them to make mistakes because if they learn something from it, they'll be more careful the next time. How many fruitloops did we pick up on the way??? LOL Anyway, now me and the girlfriend get along fine. And I do like her little boy. Not that I didn't like him before. I DID. He's a KID. He's the innocent one. BUT things are working out for them, so why should I ruin it for them. PLEASE>>> AGAIN>>> I know it's hard to shut up about how you feel. But if you want a relationship with your son, your going to have to. Watch what you say about the girl if he ends up not being with her or being with her. If you need to vent>>.then find a close friend or someone that won't mind you venting and talk to them. I really hope everything works out for you. BUT try and get along for you and your sons sake.
GOOD LUCK TO YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wish you and your son well.
(Original Air Date: 05/01/08) When couples tie the knot, they don't just marry each other; they get hitched to their spouse’s entire family. But what would you do if your in-laws were demanding, condescending and sometimes violent? Bambi hasn’t spoken to her daughter, Kendra, for two years, and she blames her son-in-law, Adam. Bambi says she and Adam got into a heated argument in which she not only slapped him, but also went looking for a gun to shoot him! Kendra says her mother was way out of line for physically assaulting Adam and doesn't know if she can change her controlling ways. Bambi says Kendra is dead to her — and even built a makeshift gravesite in her yard to symbolize her grief. The irascible in-law says she's desperate to reconcile with Kendra -- but not Adam. Will the couple accept her terms? Join the discussion.
